LittleWhiteBag I wasn't being exactly serious about sending it to them no! I went off on a cathartic dream rant where people could be forewarned / trained to behave in a way that is humane or even slightly kind.
of course I wouldn't send them that list but I wish there was a way of ensuring their behaviour fitted into them.
It's not like I'm asking much is it? Don't threaten, bully or abuse your position. Don't do illegal things and do fulfill your legal obligations. Don't discriminate, make stereotypical and discriminatory assumptions, don't abuse or instill fear to get compliance in order to cover up your own incompetence. Just please give me basic dignity and treat me like I'm a human, not a piece of inconvenient garbage.
This is what the people I've been dealing with need to know though, from my direct experience.
And so yes, I do think social workers should come prepared to be professional, non bullying and work to actually help me.
Im sure as someone who does treat people in a nice and professional way, my 'list' would be shocking and you do appear to have taken offense at it and immediately leapt to the defense of people you've never even met not heard of!
But what if you and members of your team routinely treat people like that? What if this was your normal mode of interaction, and when asked, genuinely cannot see what theyve done that is wrong. And what if there was plentiful evidence to demonstrate that this is the habitual way a team behave?
the fact is that all these things have happened to me on a regular basis. And just as workers on trains / gp waiting rooms etc are allowed to put up posters saying they won't tolerate anti social behaviour, I wish I could do the same! I wonder if you'd still find it offensive if I wrote one in the same manner and tone as those. I suspect you would actually. An interesting thought.
That I feel genuinely terrified of having to meet these people again should speak volumes about their behaviour. That I need to tell people that I won't tolerate abuse should speaks volumes about the non stop joys of the interacting with that team.
The sad truth is though, that I have to tolerate whatever shit they throw at me, and rely on my friends intervening on my behalf. That's what being very physically ill is about. It means you don't have the strength to keep insisting on basic courtesies. It means having to rely on people's good nature, and then not bring able to stop them being cruel, or get them to adhere to even basic procedures they have a statutory obligation to carry out.
I have always treated sw and other staff with politeness, courtesy and respect. This is the world i come from, blth professionally myself, and personally. And in return have been systematically bullied, threatened and ill treated. When I made an official complaint they then started to protect themselves by doing some pretty outrageous things. my legal advisor was really keen to take it forwards as it was such a clear case for her. Unfortuneately I said no as I didn't want to cause trout, I just wanted them to do their jobs. And it would make me iller going through any legal battle.
I obviously touched a neerve with my post, and you don't appear to have read or believed any of it, which seems about usual in my experiences I'm afraid. I know it was a late at night ranty post, with lots of emotion in it, but that's how people feel when systematically treated like, well, like scum.
You may indeed be a wonderful social worker, but why do you find it impossible to believe others have not been? And why write me off as 'disgruntled parent' before even seeing of that label can be stuck on me?
It's also interesting that you have only picked up on this one complaint I'd written amongst many. As I said, it's really easy to slap a 'we're doing it for the children's label on someone than contemplate anything else isn't it?
You seem to be confused about the remit of an adult social worker. Their job doesn't actually involve using the threat of taking my child unless I agree to everything they do or say.
That is illegal on the grounds of discrimination, and is not in the bests interests of the child therefore isn't even in line with the children's act. I know that now, having had legal advice, but I spent a year not daring to say or do anything because I thought they could just walk away with my child.
For example, they refuse to follow their own procedures, and will not finish their assessment nor create a care plan before issuing their hours based on their own internal budget. I ask them to follow correct procedure. They threaten to take my child. They assess me as needing X hrs of care which they then refuse to give. I tell them I need to complain if they won't provide that, they say fine but you'll find for child will be taken away if you keep pushing for that much care. I don't complain. Etc etc etc.
I'm afraid that kind of behaviour is not covered by your rather smooth statement of " i have a legal obligation to protect children so will make difficult decisions going against a parents views if it is in the best interests of a child. "
It's really sad as that's absolutely true, and yet used as a way to make sure parents aren't listened to and are immediately put in the wrong. Even when I'm talking about a completely different part of social services!
I had to insist (to their confision and denials) that they cannot just decide - with no evidence, procedure or remit - that a child is at high risk of neglect. I also said I'd welcome an official investigation as truth speaks for itself. Strangely that never quite happened though.
They decided to continue to use that terminology even though...
A, they are adult sw
B. they've not even met my child
C. . No investigations have ever been done and Ashen child services were contacted, they refused to even get involved as there was no reason for them to!
D. There are absolutely no 'red flags' that the child is being neglected
When asked to justify their statement they said 'it's because I'd you are ill you must be neglecting your child. That's what happens when people are disabled.' I dug deeper, but yes, that's it. I am disabled therefore my child must be neglected.
I wonder if you still believe that the poor dear social worker was just making decisions in the best interests of the child? or in fact in my interests beings as their remit was to provide care for me! They then moved over to the next strategy for silencing an awkward person... Declaring me mentally incompetent. If it wasn't true it would be funny.
I have never had a social worker who has been in the slightest bit professional or wanted to do their job. As i said begore, im sure they exist, but i have yet to meet one.
I approached them as I needed help as a disabled adult. They have absolutely not done that. They have made my life hell from the moment I met them and I'd love to be able to remove their discriminatory and bullying influence from my life. Unfortuneately I need the direct payments they provide. This is the intolerably high price I have to make in order to get the care I need to survive.
To get back to the OPs point. If you don't treat people in the way I've been treated, then you'll make a good social worker! Although if you do alot of the things I've mentioned above, you may fit in better (at least into the team working in my council).