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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think my sister should come to collect my DDs?

54 replies

sillyoldfool · 27/09/2013 22:39

I'm 39 weeks pg with dd3. My family are pretty rubbish, my parents have gone on a holiday which was booked after they knew I was expecting, my sister hasn't given either of my dds even a token birthday present this year (she's a childless high earner so not short of cash) and hasn't seen them in months.
We both live in London, her centrally, us in the 'burbs. For ages she's said she's going to take the girls for the day this Sunday as DH works most weekends, so I can have a break, dd1 adores her aunt and is v excited.
Turns out though that dsis thinks I should be dropping off the dds at hers, which would mean 4 40min tube journeys for me, she won't come here because it'll eat up the day and she's doing me a favour already by having them (she suggested it!)
Aibu to think that the sister of a 39 week pg woman should be bending over backwards to genuinely help, not making token gestures which actually cause more hassle?

OP posts:
canyou · 27/09/2013 23:04

what is her HSE like? when I was childless and took my Dsis DC to give Her a break she would come to mine with them, wallow in my bath free of boats, frogs, dolls heads and eat nice biscuits not ginger nut or custard creams she would watch my DVD,s /soaps better then a spa Wink , she runs a mile from my now far more child friendly houseGrin .
She used to lock us out of my HSE by putting the key in the back of the door to ensure maximum child free hours.Hmm Could you do that? because if you stay at home you might start nesting and wash the floors or do some ironingWink .

Donkeyok · 27/09/2013 23:06

itsaboat she said 4x 40 mins journey. And she'll have to get them ready.

Original poster
sillyoldfool · 27/09/2013 23:06

That sounds wonderful , unfortunate dsis lives with a rather grumpy boyfriend who would not be keen on me wallowing in their bath!

OP posts:
Original poster
sillyoldfool · 27/09/2013 23:08

Sorry donkey, no, the journey is 40min(if dd2 cooperates) but I'd have to do it 4 times.
I could, but I just cba now, she's been so stroppy, I can't be bothered with it!

OP posts:
Donkeyok · 27/09/2013 23:09

or having a water birth Haha Grin

canyou · 27/09/2013 23:09

Sad at grumpy old boyfriend. Dp used to leave the house in case Dsis went into labour and he had to deliver the baby, he used to stay in barracks when she was heavily pregnant and visiting Grin

Original poster
sillyoldfool · 27/09/2013 23:12

Grin canyou. A wise man!
The thought of going into labour with dsis's boyfriend present is really horrifying, it would turn into an episode of a sitcom.

OP posts:
ravenAK · 27/09/2013 23:16

Just say: don't be ridiculous dsis, I can't travel, I am 39 weeks pg & have your dniece3's head firmly wodged in my fanny. If you CBA to schlep over here to pick up dd1&2, it's just not workable for you to have them for the day. Another time?

& then go about your business & leave her to it. She just doesn't get it.

Original poster
sillyoldfool · 27/09/2013 23:16

Good to know I'm not being precious, thanks all, was beginning to think DH had been pandering to me too much and turned me into a softie!

OP posts:
Donkeyok · 27/09/2013 23:17

Don't take this the wrong way MN ers but is she your baby sister? Or is she just not a grown up?

Donkeyok · 27/09/2013 23:19

raven wodged in my fanny Grin

Original poster
sillyoldfool · 27/09/2013 23:23

She's 31...

OP posts:
Hellonewworld0 · 27/09/2013 23:24

YANBU she is being a tad wanky.

MoominsYonisAreScary · 27/09/2013 23:26

Noo she just doesnt have a clue does she

Donkeyok · 27/09/2013 23:27

I hope you remember how helpful she has been when its her turn.

ChippingInNeedsSleepAndCoffee · 27/09/2013 23:32

She's a twat! Has she always been so stupid and selfish?

Wibblypiglikesbananas · 27/09/2013 23:36

Exactly what Raven said.

Like you need all this extra stress and hassle right now - FGS, she should take the kids and help out, or back off graciously, not be going all teenager stroppy as you don't want to do the journey from hell for anyone pregnant so she can play fabulous aunt for the afternoon (fellow pregnant lady here and I feel your pain!).

Itsaboatjack · 27/09/2013 23:38

itsaboat she said 4x 40 mins journey. And she'll have to get them ready.

I know she did Donkeyok hence my suggestion of a compromise so only doing 2 x 40min journeys instead of 4.

Donkeyok · 27/09/2013 23:43

She can't compromise, the only compromise she'll be making is of herself when she wets herself. That journey will be a killer. Anyway I hope she's not going to do it.

Itsaboatjack · 28/09/2013 00:27

Why can't she compromise? Fair enough if she doesn't want to, but many pregnant women are still able to use the tube without wetting themselves. Anyway it was just a suggestion, I'm not quite sure why it's offended you so much.

Donkeyok · 28/09/2013 00:47

itsaboat no offence taken why would there be? Compromise is good but the op shouldn't be doing this. Of course pregnant women travel on the tube without wetting themselves. It was meant to be a joke. Based on my own experiences of both tube and my desperate urge to go 39 weeks in. Going to bed now.Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Original poster
sillyoldfool · 28/09/2013 09:48

When I was 9 days overdue with DD2 I did go abit mad travel across london on the tube with DD1 in tow to meet some people for lunch. I know it's something I could possibly do, but I just don't want to, and this was meant to be something that was going to give me a rest.
I'm waaaay more of a wreck this time than I was with DD2 as well.
They're staying home with me btw, Dsis is sulking...

OP posts:
elcranko · 28/09/2013 10:32

So glad you told your sister no OP. Hope you still manage to get some rest ThanksBrew

Wibblypiglikesbananas · 28/09/2013 14:05

More childish behaviour from DSis then? Oh well, her loss. You've got enough to deal with right now (and when/if she ever has her own children, maybe, just maybe, she'll look back and cringe at her selfishness). Good luck with the birth.

Donkeyok · 28/09/2013 14:13

Glad your putting yourself and your imminent arrival first on this one.
Dsis is a prize plonka.
Hope you have a long memory when she wants help.

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