To think PT working is more stressful than FT when a parent?

[MortifiedAdams]

Not a WOHM/SAHM debate.

Friends and colleagues who work PT seem to have so much more on their plate and seem more stressed than whose who work.FT. THe PTers still seem to have to do.most if not all of the childcare arrangements, the housework etc.

A few work shifts and one, when on days, literally does.not see her child all.of fri sat and sunday due to the way the hours fall (compressed over three days). Another has totally sporadic shifts so as soon as the rota comes out, is calling round the parents/ILs and babysitting circle to arrange cover for her shifts.

In comparison, the FTers (admittedly not many), have full time childcare in place, or have a more equal split of the domestic chores, and seem a lot less stressed.

I imagine the reason PTers do fewer hours is to make more time spent with their LOs, but they seem.to have to cram.so so.much more into that time that it must detract from the fun time.

Aibu to think that PT is the hardest set up with LOs?

YY to all who said it depends on what level of help and support you get at home and how many days work. This thread came along at an 'interesting' time for me. I've recently gone up to 4 days/week but because I can only do exactly my contracted hours because of school pickups etc, I work through lunch, rarely stop for breaks etc. (It is normal in my industry to work longer hours)

DH works 5 days and slightly longer hours so I do literally everything round the house and with the 3DC, including early morning feed for baby and all night wakings. We do have a cleaner and DH does a lot with the DC on weekends otherwise I would otherwise have gone under already, but trying to fit everything else in and not drop the ball is proving beyond me.

I do a little more than DH in terms of hours spent WOH, commuting, housework which sometimes bugs me, but mainly it's the stress of being responsible for EVERYTHING as well as never having enough time to do anything properly. Frankly, I'm starting to feel utterly desperate.

Its because backforgood the more hours you do the less there is to do at home, as dh does a lot more, things like childcarers and clubs are doing a lot of cooking, homework etc. If everyones at work there is minimal mess so hardly any cleaning. I much prefer doing 50 hours to when I was doing 25.

I guess then, it depends on your job.
I would leave work at 5, pick them up, do all the things that needed doing, then start work again in the evenings. None of my childminders have ever done homework with the dc or fed them, that's always been done at home in our own time.
For me, having 2 days off a week means I don't have to start working in the evenings, I can get it done on one of the days off.

Meant to say, so I suspect it's something that can't be generalised, it depends on so many other things.

Funny that roughtyping I am a teacher too!! My childcare costs are high and full time is just that bit extra money ; ( saying that, struggle to make ends meet), and working after children have gone to bed means not much time for housework!! Can't pay for a cleaner so it's me and the children that do it!! My standards at home slip until half term when I try to get on top of the chores (not always done!!)

Linroz my house is a tip all term too, I do have DH who works shifts so often home alone but needs lots of instruction re tidying - he does do it just needs me to direct. Grr!

Oh and meant to say, when I was working PT and receiving WTC, I was doing admin for NHS so much much lower pay than teaching. Also I only have 1 DS to sort childcare for which obv eats up a lot of wages if you have more than one

I honestly prefer working FT because you can't memtally leave things to your day off, meaning your day off ceases to be your day off and you spend it doing bitty things. It forces me to be organised and plan ahead, plus we had a nanny which meant the child-related household stuff was under control. I now do PT and DS is in nursery and it's much more stressful.

The thing I find stressful about working PT is the fact that my colleagues think I work at home on my days off (I don't !) and that I am subject to constant snide remarks about not being in all the time. I hate it. I do the job of three full-timers in three days but it is never enough. I have a relatively senior position and my managers have no problem, but the rest of the department are awful to me.

Manchester. Do you ever just point out to them that YOU ARE NOT IN ALL THE TIME BECAUSE YOU'RE A PART TIMER AND GET PAID ACCORDINGLY! Whilst looking at them as though they are thick as pig shit for needing this explaining!

They don't believe me. They also think that my 2yr old DD2 is in FT childcare and I do nothing all day!

Do you work with a bunch of incredibly stupid people? They actually think you get paid full time money but just lay about all day?

Is it one of those companies where everyone is unhappy and resentful and they all turn on each other? Been there done that.

I would talk to your manager perhaps.

You shouldn't have to be explaining yourself to other people.

I have similar but its relations who think that when Im working its easy, i do nothing, i don't have a proper job, Im not setting a good example to my
children etc. Its them that have the problem. They are clearly bitter and resentful about something! I've tried explaining that its not easy and that i do work hard but they've made up their minds. I've decided to ignore because who cares what they think. Your situation is different because they are in your work place and might be bad mouthing you to others and creating a resentful environment. For that reason i would speak to your superior about it.

I work PT hours, work every day but only four hours, 30 mile commute on buses each way and am home just when school is out.

I like it. I am here for DS, I get to spend the day working/having time to get out-of-house errands done and it's pretty flexible if I need it to be.

I can do homework as soon as DS gets in then do housework and dinner while I still have energy. Evenings can be slow and chilled.

I'm a single mum and don't have to split housework, I just do it all :o

Working FT would be much harder for us.

So in my case PT is still every day but without all the hours. I wouldn't like PT with some days on/some off or shifts but nor would I like FT hours with DS at home.

Am going to tackle kitchen cook dinner and do some work now. (Will feel virtuous then ) nice to chat to all x good luck to all of us part and full time ( and of course Sahms )

As a single parent who has worked between 16 to 37 hours since DS was born, I can assure you FT is much harder, but it is better for my career. I'm always tired and a tidy house is a long forgotten memory.

depends on the job and what support you have at home. I have worked FT, PT and been a SAHM.

PT for me was 4 days a week. I invariably did the equivalent of 5 days work across 4 days, and got paid for 4. It wasn't PT enough to warrant employing someone to cover the day I didn't do, therefore I had to do it all, just in less time. It was very pressured. And also I got overlooked for all the decent clients that came through the doors (I'm a solicitor) and got landed with all the dross.

At home my DH (who works 6 days) left most of the childcare/ house stuff to me because in his head I was working PT.

Working FT was easier for me because DH HAD to pull his weight. I brought home the lion's share of our household income, I was out as much as he was.

Now I am a SAHM. I work harder than I've ever worked before, the difference is the pay and the fact that my grey matter is shrivelling up. I'm currently considering my options, work-wise, and will not consider PT unless it's 2/3 days a week.

I think it can work but it depends on the job, the employer, how you split the chores/ childcare stuff with your OH.

Dh and I work FT. Later this year I will go on ML.

In terms of housework, there is obviously less to do when the whole family are out of the house all day. However, since dd started reception the paperwork/homework/involvement from us as parents has been overwhelming. We have to fit in these things around our working day.

I would like to return to work for three days a week.