to think that 11.30 isn't an "early night"?

[Justforlaughs]

My DH always says "lets have an early night", (euphamism for sex) but he takes so long getting ready for bed that it's always 11 - 11.30, and after being in my feet from 7 am I am knackered by then. ANd how long do you take to get ready for bed, and what about your DP? I take about 10 minutes, tops, to have a quick wash (shower in the morning), clean teeth and go to the loo, he takes well over 1/2 an hour, is that normal?

Gosh! I haven't even had my dinner yet.

Pre kids, 11:30 was early, and would be up till at least 2am most nights. However 2DC (2yo and 4mo) 10:30 is late for us!

11.30 is regular night here. 10am would be early bedtime, anything after 12.30am would be late.

We don't eat until 8-9pm most nights as not home until 7.30pm ish

Pre-kids we would stay up all night having sex, talking, having more sex, talking some more until about 5, sleep for 2 hours and be up for work - not any more! Obviously getting old now

Grarrr, my DH is like that! Even if I try and usher us upstairs at around 10 o'clock it's almost 11 by the time he's in bed, faffs around downstairs endlessly and then takes ages in the bathroom! Gets my goat, YANBU

11.30 is late. I'm in bed by 930 asleep by 10. If we get an "early night" that means 9pm in bed... But then we both get up around 6am most days

11.30 is an early night for me. I couldn't even contemplate going to bed with the intention of sleeping at 9!

11.30 is about my usual bedtime, I would call any time before 11pm an early night.

It takes me 5-10 minutes to get ready for bed- loo, teeth, moisturiser etc.

What is your DH DOING for all that time?! Is he pooing? My DH spends a good 20mins or so in the bathroom when pooing, although about 18mins of that are spent playing games on his phone

I came on to advise you 'I think you'll find he means "a shag"'. But you'd already worked that out! Tell dh to stop using that fucking annoying euphemism unless he can learn to actually get his arse in bed while it's still early! There's no need for that much fannying about surely, what is he doing for all that time?!

Oh forgot to add- YANBU! If your DH wants you to still be awake when he finally comes to bed then he needs to make his bedtime routine quicker IMO!

I am with you OP.

I am actually a night owl, but I am also a person who needs her sleep (so ideally I'd go to sleep at 1-2am but get up correspondingly later). I have a standard office job, so I like to be in bed by 11ish and asleep by midnight at the latest (because I also don't sleep brilliantly).

DP is actually less of a night owl than me naturally, but it seems like he just cannot get himself sorted and upstairs early. I don't even hint re: sex - I just tell him it's too bloody late (unless we've been on the wine ) and that he ought to start 'wooing' at 9pm if that's his intention (this isn't sexist, I do the same if I am feeling in the mood). This hasn't had any demonstrable effect, though fortunately we are both happy with our level of intimacy.

Partly though we eat very late and both have delicate stomaches, so a 9pm meal (not unusual) and a 10pm bed isn't reasonable.

I went to bed at 7.30 last night

That would be early for me, as I rarely go before 1.

We both have a shower before bed, and another in the morning.

We like to be in bed by 10.30(ish). Takes us about 3-5 minutes each to get in and then we have a little read. We can manage an "early night" on a Sunday when we have had a bit of a rest on a Saturday and Sunday but depends how much work DH brings home at the weekends.

DH is up at about 5.45 and likes a slow cup of tea and a bath in the mornings and is usually out before 7 to avoid London traffic; I am usually up by 6.30 - consequently we are pooped by 10pm (ish).

10pm is bedtime. Before is early, after is late.

My dh and I regard an early night as 9-9.30 a normal night is 9.30 to 10 and late is after 10.30.

Admittedly it's more difficult to have an early night and have sex with teenagers in the house

I start thinking about bed at about 12.30am, usually. Go up, do usual messing about - 15 mins maybe - teeth, mouthwash, wash, brush hair, check on the DC, get into PJs. If we both go up at the same time a shag is pretty much inevitable unless one of us really isn't in the mood. Only one of us can be in the bathroom so if I've done bathroom stuff we'll often get down to it then DH goes and does his bathroom stuff after while I read. Or vice versa, if he's already ready for bed/in bed we can have a roll in the hay and I'll brush my teeth after! I often read for half an hour or so and lights go out around 1.30-2am depending. Youngest DC is a baby and not a great sleeper so will usually be up once or twice in the night, if it's twice we'll share, then up at about 7.30am or whenever the baby shouts at us.

My DH does bathroom faffing as well, takes him ages to actually get into bed from saying 'let's go to bed!' On a work night I try to have lights out by 10pm as I have to get myself and toddler DS out of the house and on the road by 6.50am... Weekends or otherwise I try to be asleep by 11pm because of toddler who always wakes before 7am... I have always needed lots of sleep, but am incapable of lying in in the mornings so early nights work for me.