To be fed up with my friend thinking she is the centre of the universe

[MoveYourArmsLikeHenry]

A friend of mine, Jane, recently broke her arm and two of her fingers in a horse ridding accident. Because she lives in the country side and I in the city, we have to drive a few good miles to each others houses.

We are friends with this other girl, lets call her Ann. Jane is more friends with Ann than I am. I would say hi to her at social outings and the occasional message on fb, but that's it really. But the two of them would go out together sometimes. They have known each other for years.

Last week I arranged to go and visit Jane, as she obviously can't drive with her arm. All went well. Fast forward to Wednesday when I received an angry text from Jane. Apparently she was annoyed because Ann really wanted to go and visit her as well last week and I never bothered to say to her so its my fault she never went . Last weekend Jane was complaining to me because Ann hadn't been texting her asking how she was or arranging to visit her. Jane is now miffed with me and not answering phone calls/ texts. Ann has her own car and has driven to Janes house many times before so it's not like she doesn't have a way there or know how to get there.

I am fuming about this. I have done so much for Jane over the years and I fail to see why Ann needed me to ask her to go and visit Jane.

AIBU to assume that if other people want to visit Jane it's up to them to sort it out with her?

Why doesn't Jane complain to Ann? Why are you in the middle?

Get rid of both of them. Who needs friends like this?

Yanbu. What a pair of nobbers.

yanbu. though ye all sound like a bunch of teenagers. don't keep trying to contact her she is a grown woman. wait for her to. maybe she is having a shit time at the moment but she is hardly fuckin house bound! give her space. sounds to me like she wont be long about contacting you for the attention.

and if you really feel like this why are you bothering with her ...

yanbu are you sure you have the full story and ann has not been strring things with embellishments that you refused her a lift or some such nonsense?

What a strange reaction from Jane. Very rude. The other friend can easily sort out visiting herself if she has a car.
I would be very cross too.
Don't really know what to suggest!

Thanks for replying. Jane and I have been friends for years and I have no idea why she is blaming me for another person not visiting her.

Are the pain killers sending her a bit funny or something? Definitely seems very unfair attitude to take towards you, and very immature reaction.

Jane sounds like an arse. I would just say 'i didn't ask Ann if she wanted to visit you as I have not seen or spoken to her for some time. As she has her own car she could come and see you any time she likes so it is not my fault if she hasn't'
Sounds a lot like Ann is making excuses of why she couldn't come and Jane I'd just avoiding seeing the obvious - Ann can't be arsed!

Meganorks thank you. I told jane that I didn't think to ask I just assumed that of Ann wanted to visit her she would arrange to do so herself.

YANBU - how odd to think you have any control over whether Ann texts, calls or visits?

I would point that out to her and based off her reaction would either drop her or brush it off as frustration with her injury.

YANBU

How strange. Ann can arrange seeing Jane herself if she wants to, why would you need to be involved at all? Just ignore both of them. I'm sure Jane will recover from her strop soon and realise that she's being ridiculous.