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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Is this wrong or am I being too pc...

81 replies

sillyoldfool · 21/09/2013 09:02

Dd1 (6-Y2) did an assembly yesterday for 'jeans for genes day' all lovely, school raised money for a good cause, brilliant.
The assembly was about genes and what they are/how they affect us.
They explained genes as being like a recipe, then said 'sometimes someone has the wrong ingredients and the recipe goes wrong, if a person has the wrong ingredients they might have to use a wheelchair or a hearing aid or take lots of medicine'
I thought that was the wrong way to teach 6/7 year olds about disability, I'd be mortified of dd told someone in a wheelchair they were made with the 'wrong ingredients' it's just not true!
I feel as though I should say something about it, but am I overreacting?

OP posts:
fanjoforthemammaries7850 · 21/09/2013 10:51

I just don't know tbh..it is indeed a tricky issue and needs some thought. My brain isn't working well today

mrsjay · 21/09/2013 10:51

I know but I am trying to think of an alternative I guess the school was just trying to expalin it to young children and this is how they did it, maybe we are over thinking it

sillyoldfool · 21/09/2013 10:53

How about 'everyone's recipe is different, some people's recipes might mean they need extra help, they might need to use a wheelchair/hearing aid/take medicines'
???

OP posts:
sillyoldfool · 21/09/2013 10:54

Well I won't be saying anything till Monday obviously, so do come back and say if you can think of a good way to express it.

OP posts:
MrsDeVere · 21/09/2013 11:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

DancesWithWoolEnPointe · 21/09/2013 11:03

I think that is very good silly

valiumredhead · 21/09/2013 11:14

Silly, much better!Smile

sashh · 21/09/2013 14:54

How about 'everyone's recipe is different, some people's recipes might mean they need extra help, they might need to use a wheelchair/hearing aid/take medicines'

Some recipes mean people have blue eyes, and some that they have brown.

Some recipes mean people have straight hair, some make it curly.

Some recipes make people good at doing somethings easily, such as if you are tall you can get things from high shelves, sometimes the recipe makes it harder to do things, small people find it harder to reach tall shelves.

Ellie Simmonds is a good example of having genes that make it harder to win swimming competitions but that doesn't mean it is impossible.

Sometimes the recipe makes it easy for things that are not very nice to happen, such as making people break bones easily, or makes it easy for them to get ill.

I don't think age 6 need more than this, I think disability awareness is a different topic and I think it is too much to go into detail about genetic and or congenital illnesses. Or genetic predisposition to illnesses.

I've done an equality and diversity presentation comparing people to fruit that could be changed for this.

All fruit is fruit, just like all people are people. But fruit is all different shapes and sizes and the shape, size and taste is because of the tree it was picked from.

Different fruit is better at different things, if you want to draw a yellow fruit then a banana or a mango but not a strawberry.

If you want to eat a fruit with the skin on then an apple is better than an orange.

That sort of thing.

junkfoodaddict · 21/09/2013 15:13

The children are actually saying the gene make-up is wrong - not the child - which biologically is absoutely correct. For any genetic disability whether it is physically obvious or not, it is due to genetics going wrong i.e. genes missing, extra genes etc, etc and I think this is perfectly reasonable for a 6 year old to understand at this point in their learning. Children with downs syndrome for example have an extra chromosome which is NOT what nature intended - it happens, we know and most people accept this. BUT if in a cake mixture you put an extra egg in, then the cake won't turn out the way it should. It sounds crude, I know, but that is how it is!
Jeans for Genes Day raises money for research into curing genetic conditions like this as well as caring for people who 'suffer' from them and by raising money for it you are, in effect, accepting that genetic conditions are something we prefer not to have in our lives and accept that these conditions are 'wrong'.
I think YABU (not in a horrible way) and I can see your point of view but look upon this as little children trying to make sense of their world. As long as they are taught that the child with the genetic condition is not wrong and their condition is the result of something happening to them that they had no control over, I think what they said is fine.

namechangesforthehardstuff · 21/09/2013 17:10

Wheredoallthe - I was talking to OP about the PC comment, sorry if that wasn't clear.

OP I'm not sure you have to rewrite it for them, just tell them it wasn't great and why.

footphobic · 21/09/2013 17:39

I struggle to get annoyed or insulted with the wording used, assuming it's quoted accurately. It's an explanation of genetic make-up, not the actual person and their ability.

I have a severe genetic condition, also very rare. In regard to the analogy, my recipe is essentially correct, but a faulty gene mean I don't make enough of one ingredient. My recipe is not different, it does go wrong. I'm not an insensitive person, far from it, and I agree it's important to explain appropriately and sensitively, but it also has to make sense and it just doesn't bother me to say I have a faulty gene, or it doesn't work properly or it's gone 'wrong'.

I have children with the same condition - but unlike ReindeerBollocks I don't believe this description would have made them feel inferior or upset, in that context. I've had to explain it to them at a young age obviously so have given this some thought in the past and they in turn have talked to friends and adults.

Reading this post, I realise I'm not as sensitive to certain language and terms used as some here.

I wouldn't choose this analogy myself, but I can accept an explanation of my something in my body going 'wrong' without feeling like I am being described as abnormal or wrong as a person. I just don't automatically relate the two - but I do appreciate that others may see it differently and more negatively, it's a very personal thing for those with personal experience.

saggyhairyarse · 21/09/2013 19:02

I like the recipe analogy but think they should substitute the word wrong for different. Different recipe = different cake.

Viviennemary · 21/09/2013 19:09

I agree with you OP. It was very thoughtlessly presented at best. I don't think this has anything to do with being PC or not.

hazeyjane · 21/09/2013 19:26

Was the wording something like this?

the thing about recipes is that you have to follow them very carefully. Otherwise they don't work properly.
Genes are similar.
If one of the ingredients in someone's gene recipe is missing or if they have the wrong ingredient,
then it could mean they have to use a wheelchair, or only eat certain foods,
or take special medicines or all kinds of things like that.

But, differences in your gene recipe are not always bad news.
Sometimes they just mean that someone's eyes are blue instead of brown, or that their hair is straight instead of curly.
I guess we're all special and different in some way. Imagine what a boring place the world would be if everyone was the same.

This is from a 'for schools' video from Jeans For Genes.

When we had a genetics nurse visit us wrt ds, and being part of a study into genetic disorders, she used the recipe analogy when talking to us, i think it is quite a popular one to use.

To the person who hates Jeans for Genes day, i am curious as to why, their aim is to raise awareness of the lives of those with genetic disorders and raise money for a variety of support groups who help families affected by genetic disorders - what is wrong with that?

Thymeout · 21/09/2013 19:48

i have a friend who had a son with a genetic condition. The operative word is 'had'. He died, aged 12, after spending most of his life in a wheelchair.

She would most definitely say that there was something 'wrong' with his genetic makeup. To say that his recipe was merely 'different' would be a gross minimalisation of his condition. She would have given her life to have been able to 'fix' him.

And all the social accommodation in the world could not have changed the outcome.

Genes for Jeans is trying to raise money so that other children and families do not suffer as hers did. Keep it simple. I think the 'social model' is relevant to attitudes to disability in general. But this is specifically related to medical issues, caused by faulty genes, and the medical approach makes more sense in this context.

Thymeout · 21/09/2013 19:52

Sorry - Jeans for Genes.

parakeet · 21/09/2013 20:14

Isn't the whole point of Jeans for Genes to try to raise money for people who have, yes, faulty, or "wrong" genes?

So yes, OP, I think you are being too PC, for want of a better word.

MrsDeVere · 21/09/2013 20:21

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

hazeyjane · 21/09/2013 20:33

Jeans For Genes no longer funds research into genetic conditions, the money raised goes into practical support (respite, equipment etc) and specific support groups for a variety of genetic conditions.

MrsDeVere · 21/09/2013 20:39

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SarahAndFuck · 21/09/2013 20:57

I am deaf in one ear and one of my eyes is split into two colours.

Waardenburg Syndrome has been a suggested cause for this but I've never had an official diagnosis for it.

DS doesn't really understand when I say my ear doesn't work so I've tried to explain genes and DNA etc as lego bricks, we are all made up of little bricks and that sometimes people get a brick that doesn't match the rest.

I said that sometimes people can't see the difference, like they can't see that my ear doesn't work, and sometimes they can see the difference, like the colour of my eye, but since everyone is different anyway it's just another thing that makes each person unique.

Then I had to explain unique. I'm not a scientist or an expect, but I prefer my explanation than the word 'wrong' in the OP.

DorisIsAPinkDragon · 21/09/2013 21:14

dd2 has a hidden genetic condition (which hugely impacts on her life) She would be devastated to be told she has the 'wrong' recipe.

Because of her genes her body works differently to her sisters and she needs extra help to do things others would take for granted.

(incidentally her condition and the trust that support us is not affilated to the jeans for Genes day- and it's one of the larger genetic charities)

JumpingJackSprat · 22/09/2013 10:13

going back to an earlier point, i can understand that some people may have a genetic condition and may not be hankering for a cure, being content to live with the condition. seeing what a person with cystic fibrosis has to do every single day to just stay healthy and stay alive basically prevents a normal life as most people would know it. i would have thought even if just one person wants to live a normal life free of all the physio, appointments and medication then genetic research is a good thing. im a bit off topic sorry, but heres an article that explains the difference gene therapy can make : www.express.co.uk/life-style/health/418468/Cystic-fibrosis-wonder-drug-can-give-my-girl-a-future

TheSporkforeatingkyriarchy · 22/09/2013 12:56

Silly - I think your rewording is lovely, far nicer and suitable for the age group.

magicberry · 22/09/2013 12:59

OP I expect that is just your DD's recollection of what is probably carefully crafted wording (eg hazeyjane's example).
I would not get too hung up on it.