DS is nearly two and the tantrums have started. Yesterday he had a full on one. Luckily he was in the buggy, because I couldn't have gone near him without getting hurt. He was screaming and shaking so much that he almost looked like he was fitting.
So, were I to have done this at the same age, I'd have been told to be quiet, shouted at and/or hit (or had my face shoved under a cold water tap, effectively water-boarding me).
I'm trying to do things differently with my children. So back to yesterday. I brought the buggy to a quieter place, knelt beside it and talked calmly to DS - just like I've read about - told him I loved him, i couldn't give him what he'd been wanting, and tried to figure out a solution for him, told him it was to feel so angry and upset, but I was there with him and wouldn't go. At first he continued the screaming, but then the look in his eyes changed and he realised I was trying to help. Gradually he calmed down and in the end he just wanted a cuddle and then to go and look at lorries on the road.
I'm SURE it won't always be like this, that I won't always have the time to do that (it wasn't quick!), but it did occur to me that I'm probably the first person in my family to do that and more specifically to not hit the tantruming toddler and to listen to him..
And then I felt a bit proud of myself. I don't know if I should really, but I can't really tell anyone all that in RL.
To be fair to DS, he's feeling under the weather, which is probably why the tantrum got so bad.