to be shitting myself about starting full -time University next week at the age of 42?

[TerribleTeenTweenTwinsTantrumm]

Am bricking it.

I am a fat, old boring mother of 4 who has extreme anxiety issues (panic attacks and OCD). I see myself running out of the lecture theatre in panic .

I am going to be a laughing stock aren't I? No one will want to sit with me at lunch. What the hell have I done???

I'm 31 and have two children - I start uni at the end of the month too! Nervous but excited - remember, everyone else will probably be feeling the same way. Take it one day at a time and you will love it! :)

I'm a mature student too with anxiety and MH issues. I just wrote out a massive post and it disappeared!

I have my first lecture tomorrow and I am also shitting myself. Turned 40 last month and only found out I had a place last week! Doing mine part time as I am a lone parent and run a small business. No idea how I'm going to manage but read lots of positive stories on here from people in similar situations.
Besides it cant get any worse than my induction day last week when I walked up 3 flights of stairs with my skirt tucked into my pants!

just wanted to say well done and congratulations. You are obviously clever and interesting & making great things happen for yourself. You will have a great experience. Everyone will be feeling apprehensive just now & you will take it in your stride once you get going - any new experience will give you plenty to chat to your fellow students about. Enjoy .

I'll try again! I'm 34, starting my final year next week - yay! I have long term MH and anxiety issues.

These are some of the ways I manage them:

One of my triggers is feeling trapped and not able to leave a room easily. In lecture theatres and seminar classrooms I try to sit on the end if a row and near the door.

Part of my course involves giving presentations (not in the first year though!) and generally we're expected to contribute in class discussions. I went to my tutors personally and explained my issues, they were very understanding.
I find it less anxiety-inducing to be as prepared as possible before a seminar, if you can't get all the required reading done at least Google and know roughly what the jist is.

Your uni will have a Disabled Students' Service. They're available for help and advice, you may even be entitled to Disabled Student Allowance (DSA).

Enjoy it! Going back to education is seriously the best thing I've ever done. Good luck :)

I ran out of several exams having panic attacks while at uni. I still ended up with a degree. In fact, I ended up being a university lecturer!

So, a couple of points:

First, you can do this. As others have said, find out what support services are available from your uni and use them. I ended up taking the rest of my exams in a room on my own to avoid that horrible "oh god, I'm panicking and everyone's going to notice" feeling. My tutors did other little things, like arranging me to do in-class presentations first so I didn't spend the whole class period getting more and more nervous before doing mine

Secondly, I promise you that we lecturers are human, we get the impact that anxiety issues can have on students, we want to help and we may well have been there ourselves.

I am starting uni on Monday too!

Social work, I have similar worries about being 'the old one' though i am told there are lots of mature students who take this course so thats good.

I have 2 young children that i will be juggling also, good luck with your course! It will be exciting and fun and hard all at the same time!

P.s i also suffer with anxiety and take medication for it.

I'm in my third year (I'm 31) and I love it! Granted I don't really get involved in the social things, but having two dc's and being 10 years older than everyone else, that's to be expected ( i do always get invited though, which is lovely). I've made lots of friends, some young, some old...being older has its advantages too as I was made a supervisor during our digs. They usually call me the 'mum' as I always have baby wipes/plasters and other sensible mum things that these young uns don't think about ;)

It won't all be 18 year olds. There are a couple of students in their thirties on my course, and more who started in their twenties. We often invited one of the ladies in her thirties to lunch with us, and she came to my best friend's 21st birthday party.

However, university isn't like school, and you don't have defined "lunches". We often walked into the city centre for lunch when we had an hour's break at around the right time, but sometimes you will only have lectures in the mornings/afternoons anyway.

Once you get a personal tutor, hopefully they will be able to signpost you towards the support you need for your OCD/anxiety. You might also be entitled to some support from DSA, which the disability services should be able to advise you about. You might also be allowed to sit exams in a smaller room, and other reasonable adjustments.

No-one will think this is weird. Universities are generally quite good at supporting additional needs, and plenty of people will have assistance and special exam arrangements due to all sorts of needs.

University isn't like school, and there isn't the same level of cliquishness. You won't get people making fun of you in lectures- people are there to work and will usually be concentrating (or at least quiet). Bullying/meaness does happen in universities, but in my experience it's mostly confined to halls.

Don't forget all the 18 year olds will be feeling exactly the same, with the added worries of leaving home for the first time. I bet you'll end up really enjoying it and having lots of fun!

I am 46 and started uni on Monday!! I love it!

I am having the time of my life. I have three children, two of them still young (7 and 8). I have to come to a different city and leave them with their Dad to come here. I miss them like crazy but will go home every weekend.

There are loads of mature students too but the youngsters value our life experience, so I chat to them too. I am going to a freshers party (my only one, I promise) tomorrow night, with a 24 and 25 year old as well as my more mature friend of 31.

First of all well done! Good on you for going :)

Please dont worry, when i was at uni there were loads of mature students on my course. It was actually a good thing as they had different opinions, more life experience etc and could often contribute a hell of a lot more than us hungover 18 year olds. Made things more interesting as they would be able to offer different perspectives.

I also had anxiety through uni and coped by making sure i sat near the doors, etc. you will get through it honestly. Dont worry about making friends, it will happen naturally, and there will probably be other mature students feeling the same who you can buddy up with.

Im sure you will be fine once you have done the first couple of weeks and got into the swing of it. Good luck!!

I was 42 when I went .it was fab, quite a few mature students but also loads young enough to be my daughter. They were great fun ( and some are still close friends) but also used to entertain me with their drunken adventures. Funnily I am back ( very part time) to do an additional module, love having my student ID again. Good luck.it
Will fly by

Well done & remember that student support services offer lots of help & support for students so do take advantage of whats on offer.

Go and speak to them BEFORE you experience difficulties as they will be able to help you put measures in place to help you cope. For eg. Lots of unis have an online coursework submission system so you can avoid queueing up at the office to hand in youe essay.

You maybe able to enrol online so again you can avoid crowds. If you know what to expect you are halfway there to managing your schedule at a pace which suits you.

Lectures are large but anonymous as tbe lecturer is delivering the lecture & students just listen and take notes. The tutorials are smaller groups of about 10-15 students taking part in discussions ablut the the main lecture & related topics. Depending on the degree, it might be practicals (science & engineering) instead lf discussion groups. The key is to be prepared & do your reading and you will be fine.

If there are workshops on public speaking, social interaction skills, I would strongly recommend that you take some. You need to take control of your anxiety rather than allow the anxiety take control of you.

good for you!

re the 18 year olds - be prepared for some of the young males to take some time to cope with you: you aren't their mum and they don't want to have sex date you, which means you don't fit into any of their pigeonholes. The smarter/more interesting ones will work it out.

the girls will think you are their mum for a while, then again will work it out.

but as others note, there will be plenty of older people too.

There's a diverse assortment of people at university. You're very likely to make some good friends and find people you get on well with. Your coursemates will be interested in the same subject as you, so that's a great start. University is all about opening yourself to new experiences and meeting a wide variety of people, whatever age/size/background/religion etc. So usually most people are friendly and open-minded. It's a great suggestion above to find out if there's a society for mature students or other places they're likely to gather. But you may also find you make plenty of friends without age coming into it.

I'm 38 and also starting next week! Whats worse for me is that I get direct entry onto the 3rd year of a degree course due to my job/experience, so those cocky youngsters will all know each other, and I won't know anyone!

I can't wait to get started despite that. I will also be continuing to work 30 hours a week in my job (police officer) and am a single Mum to 2 teenagers, so its going to be pretty full on.

Good luck to anyone starting next week.

Good luck to you as well, Fluffy.

You will be very popular the minute essay titles are handed out! You will also do the work in plenty of time and to a very high standard, earning the awe and envy of your younger counterparts.

That's how it went on the psychology degree I finished last year. All of the mature students got firsts, and jobs in the field. Keep your eye on the prize! You will love it, it's life changing.

Thank you LChammer!

I am starting a Masters at the end of the month as well and I am 41. I finished my degree when I was 38. I studied part time for my degree and there were loads of mature students. It was the best thing I ever did. It's really natural to be nervous but keep your eyes on the prize. I bet you'll be more focused than the 18 year olds who will be dealing with living away from home for the first time, socialising etc. make the most of it because it goes by in a flash. You'll love it.

You are AWESOME and I am dead jealous!

FWIW I did a post-grad course at 25 (got in through work exp, didn't actually have a degree). The students ranged from 21 to mid-forties & no-one batted an eyelid or treated the older ones any differently.

Good luck!