AIBU to be annoyed with DH over consistent lateness?

[Monkeyandanimal]

It doesn't matter what he is doing, he tells me he'll be back at x o'clock and is invariably 20 mins up to 2 hours late......i really wouldn't mind if he just told me the real time to start with. Making me angry and resentful, and i have told him this many times, he just gets all defensive. that's off chest, feel better, and there he is at the door.....

Dp is like this. He doesn't get that I worry! Funnily enough he's only ever late home from football or a night out... Yanbu

My dad is like this. We've learnt now to add on at least half an hour to what he says. And if we invite them for a meal, we tell them 7.30 when we're planning to eat at 8, so food is ready when he's late!

It's rude and inconsiderate and no reason for it apart from laziness and can't be arsed !!!!

It is rude. YANBU.

I wouldn't wait for him.

Mines the same and now if I have to be somewhere I just go it bloody rude does he see it no but then takes the hump when I go, well waiting on him for an hour when he said he'd be 20 minutes is taking the piss in my book. So ynbu.

I can't stand lateness it is rude and unnecessary. fair enough it happens sometimes with genuine reason but 9/10 times its poor time management or just a disregard for other people

Is he ever on time for anything-work, appointments?

If so, why are you so unimportant?

Someone once told me that the message they are giving you is my time is more important than your time. Ex-H used to do this. It drove me mad.

yes, he is on time for appointments etc; its not that he's late when we have plans, its more when he's coming home from work/play and the kids and i are looking out of the window every five minutes expecting him any minute....which gets really irritating after a while. i hope he doesn't think i am unimportant though....

'You not turning up when you say you will makes me feel as though I am not important. It makes me think you do not care about me and being on time for me. If you cannot realistically say you will be with me for 7 pm, do not say it, say the more realistic 8pm. I so not mind what time you say but I do get upset about how late you are'

This is the speech I gave ExH after a few dates. He changed his ways sharpish, not turning up any earlier, but being more realistic about his arrival time! We got married a few months later and managed 10 years of married life on this basis, so not too bad!!

Thinking you are unimportant is part of it!! Tell him that is not acceptable!