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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think showing video footage of 9/11 is suitable for yr7 and yr 8?

81 replies

BizzyLizzy70 · 11/09/2013 17:36

In assembly today at our child's school they showed a video about 9/11 including footage of the twin towers burning, planes etc. There was a photo they showed of a woman curled up throwing herself out the top of one of the towers that particularly affected my child. Am I being too sensitive or is this really appropriate to be showing 11 and 12 year olds this?

OP posts:
BrokenSunglasses · 11/09/2013 17:44

There is a lot of footage of 9/11, some will be suitable, some won't be. I think showing a woman throwing herself off the building is pushing it, but unless ou could see a close up of her face, or of her when she landed, I think it's ok.

I think it's around this age that children become aware of the reality of the horrible things that happen in the world. It's always been taught at a safe distance before. Unless your dd is especially sensitive, I think it's ok to show it, and it's ok for her to be upset by it.

It happened, and it is upsetting, but we can't shield them from reality forever. They have to know about these things sooner or later, and personally I'd rather they were given an opportunity to see these things with responsible adults present rather than them looking it up with their friends on YouTube.

As long as it was handled well, I think it's ok to show these things.

MADNESSislikeGRAVITY · 11/09/2013 17:46

I think YABU, to an extent.

9/11 happened. People died. Yes, it is horrific, but I'd rather not shield my kids from the truth. The world is a dangerous place and there are some evil people in it. Kids have to learn that life isn't a disney film.

It's hardly as bad as my old school, where they thought it was appropriate to show anti-abortion films with graphic images and a totally biased agenda to Year 8 classes, without the knowledge or consent of their parents.

WorraLiberty · 11/09/2013 17:48

YABU

I don't think I know a single child aged 11 to 13 who hasnt' seen some sort of footage.

CoffeeTea103 · 11/09/2013 17:49

As horrific as it was it is the truth and reality. They will see much worse on the Internet. You can't shield them from everything. You can however talk them through it, to prepare them for other situations they may encounter like this.

Fleta · 11/09/2013 17:50

I agree with both posters so far. I think you'd be surprised at what our children are exposed to - I would far rather them be exposed to things in a calm environment where I presume they're going to get explanations.

My daughter is 6. Last December when Sandy Hook happened I was so, SO careful not to let her see/hear the news. Except driving through our village she read a newspaper advertising board and asked me "mummy what's a school massacre" (damn advanced readers.....) So I had to give her a potted and appropriate account.

YouTheCat · 11/09/2013 17:50

It's part of history.

I remember the realisation of what went on during the holocaust. I was 12 and was looking through a Daily Mirror that my Grandad had kept from 1945.

I don't think children of that age should be shielded from facts.

TheProsAndConsOfHitchhiking · 11/09/2013 17:52

Yabu. There is a big bad world out there beyond the comfort of your home. Children need to be aware of this.

homebythesea · 11/09/2013 17:52

Except for the "jumper" I think our kids need to see this- so much foreign policy has stemmed from this event it needs to be understood by the next generation. We took kids of similar ages to the 9/11 memorial in NYC 2 years ago and looked at footage beforehand so they could put it in context

Fairylea · 11/09/2013 17:56

It's history. It needs to be shown and understood. I think it's about the right age to be exposed to some of the darker aspects of history.

My year 6 ten year old has been learning about it today. I sat with her last night as she was asking about it and we watched some clips on you tube and talked about it.

freddiefrog · 11/09/2013 17:56

Is there ever an age when it wouldn't be upsetting?

12 years on and those images still have the power to shock and upset me. It was horrific, so savage and shocking, but it's part of history, and I don't think our children should be shielded from it.

CoolStoryBro · 11/09/2013 17:57

I think it is right to teach the kids about 9/11. It's a crucial part of modern world history. However, I am firmly against using images of the very private last moments of people's lives as educational tools.

MrsMook · 11/09/2013 17:58

I started teaching 10 yrs ago when it was all very fresh in the minds of y7 and 8. Some boys were very imaginatively obsessed with the hunt for Bin Laden etc. It was a massive event that altered the direction of society since y8 and y7 were born. It is still influential with soldiers in Afganhistan and affecting our decison making towards Syria. It affects attitudes towards communities in our own country. Secondary pupils are too young to have their first hand memories now, but it is something they need to know about. They will learn about the holocaust around y8 and y9. As long as the footage chosen is appropriately chosen, and it does need to reflect the shocking nature of the event within reason, then yes, it is an appropriate subject matter.

Miserably · 11/09/2013 18:00

I was in year 8 when it happened and I remember seeing the footage on the news at the time. I was definitely old enough to understand and found it no more upsetting than I do today aged 24. At that age you start being exposed to a lot more about the world, good and bad, so in agreement with the point made by BrokenSunglasses better to show it in a controlled environment.

Lj8893 · 11/09/2013 18:02

I was in yr8 when it happened. I still remember watching the news and realising what had happened.
It's a major part of history and is so relevant to our life's now so yes i think children need to be educated about it, and if showing footage aids that education than so be it.

ihearttc · 11/09/2013 18:03

DS2 is 8 and has been watching stuff about 9/11 for a couple of years now. It all started because me and Dh went to New York on our honeymoon in 2004 so obviously post 9/11 and we were talking about it and showing him pictures.

It actually never occurred to me to not show him? It happened and its important to be talked about with children of all ages to a certain extent.

MrsOakenshield · 11/09/2013 18:04

I think it needs to be seen because it needs to be remembered. And next year (100th anniversary of the start of the First World War) they may well be seeing some more pretty unpleasant things. Much as it's natural to want to shield our children, some things can't and shouldn't be hidden and I think, with an adult to hand to explain, that they aren't too young.

Lest we forget and all that.

buttermellow · 11/09/2013 18:06

YABVU. I watched 9/11 at age ten, as it happened live, on the news, as did my entire class and 2 others as our teachers wanted to watch.

We discussed the jumpers in school the next day from memory as pupils were affected, but it was seen as a bit of a lesson in understanding human suffering.. The underlying message was that we should feel sad for those involved, and thankful that we were fortunate enough to not have been involved.. It was disturbing but it was real and it personally affected tens of thousands of people, if not more, including many many children. To protect our children from it, whilst thousands have zero choice, would be wrong, but we should always be mindful of what's appropriate.. Explaining that people jumped if they ask - fine. Explaining that people jumped and what happened when they fell etc - no. Supporting them in understanding what can be upsetting and scary - yes. Discussing it as matter of fact with no support or compassion - no..

Incidentally we covered 9/11 in secondary barely 3 years later and went into far more depth, including analysing the thinking behind it and all sorts. We were only just thirteen then and as a whole were expected to cope with it

MurderOfGoths · 11/09/2013 18:07

Showing it to them in a situation where they can talk about it is probably the best way.

Tee2072 · 11/09/2013 18:10

YABU it's history. It's fact. When should they watch it?

BackforGood · 11/09/2013 18:11

I think you are being oversensitive (I have a dd who is in Yr7). It's part of history - she's seen bits of various documentaries already. It's a massive event (just) in their lifetime. It's the breaking news the world was being stunned with on the day I brought her home from hospital. My friends' twins arrived on that day.

wigglesrock · 11/09/2013 18:12

I don't think it's inappropriate at all. I think 11-12 years old is fine. Kids need to learn, appreciate and understand the world - however sad it might be.

My then 7 year old covered WWII last year in school. They learnt about the Holocaust, about death camps - I didn't feel that was inappropriate either.

Idespair · 11/09/2013 18:12

I think that generally it would be appropriate to this age group. It was horrific but part of history and should be remembered. I think the photo of the woman jumper was possibly a bit scary without warning, perhaps this could have been described rather than shown.

Sirzy · 11/09/2013 18:15

I agree with the majority here. We can't, and shouldn't, hide children from things like this.

Bowlersarm · 11/09/2013 18:19

Sorry but I think YABU.

It happened. As someone said, children of their age couldn't have escaped it from all the news at the time.

It's appropriate to show it on the anniversary, although truly horrific, and gives you an opportunity to talk it through with them and answer any questions or try and help them with any worries.

Like other posters i remember learning of the Holocaust. I felt depressed and sick to my stomach for weeks afterwards that humans could be that vicious and violent towards other humans. I wasn't able to talk to anyone about it.

Unfortunately all these truly horrendous things happened, and really, there's no hiding from it.

Hulababy · 11/09/2013 18:20

DD is 11y and has seen images and news footage from 9/11. She has also been to the WTC site three times and seen the site in varying states of rebuilding, including seeing the new buildings this summer. At each time - she was about 7y the first time we visited NY - I talked to her about what happened. It is upsetting. I remember seeing it, as an adult - incidently a secondary school teacher too - at the time. It was horrific then, still is now. I remember assembly the following day inc Y7s in there, fresh in their minds. It is our modern history now - it is important for it to be known.