To not want the Council to make my son late for school?

[JKSLtd]

OK, it's not quite that straightforward but...

DS2 gets a bus to his SN school.
(Originally they picked him up last)
Then they changed to pick him up first as they realised I was always ready & waiting for them, with DS1 (now 7) & DD (now 2.5) in the car. They asked if it would be better to get DS2 earlier, it was, so they did.
All was fine.

Now they've had the rules 'tightened' and they must pick up in order of 'near-ness' to school. DS2 is closest to school so must be the last pickup. This means that DS1 will always be late for his school. DD doesn't have to be in until a bit later (pre-sch) for now but will eventually be made late too.

We've asked if they can't do like last year and been told it's against the rules, and meanwhile the (lovely) driver is in trouble for changing her route last year :(

They think that DS2 will be on the bus for too long if he's picked up first (max is 45mins, and it would be about that).
But...he was perfectly happy with this last year.

We are happy for him to be on the bus that long.
He is happy to be on the bus that long.
The driver is happy to pick him up first.
The bus company is happy to pick him up first.

The Council seems to be in charge of the transport and refuses to change the order.
We can appeal (and in the middle of loads of paperwork) but have already been told it probably will be refused as it's not on medical grounds.
Also told that 'it's a free service, you don't have to use it, you can take him to school yourself or arrange childcare/breakfast club for the other children'
(DS1 & DD's school do not have a breakfast club and anyway even if it did, I would have to take DS2 with me to drop them off then home for the bus, which would be ridiculous and have him in a car/bus for longer anyway.)
I can't take him to school myself as the times are the same as DS1.

So, the Council are determined to make at least one of my children late for school every day.
(Oh, btw DH is away with work most of the week, of course on the rare days he's here/still here at sch run time he will help out).

What can I say to help them change their minds??

Sorry this is too long, I hope you've made it to the end!

You could ask social services for an assessment for direct payments to cover someone being with your DS2 whilst you leave the others to school. I suspect someone higher up would have words with the SEN transport department to avoid having to pay DP's?

Totally ridiculoys you should find yourself in this situation.

I have no practical advice except...... if this is s policy that has been instituted to save money, can you do some digging? FOI request to ask annual cost of "compliance cars [WTAF?]" and savings from changing route guidelines?

I think the chair of the council's children's services committee would probably be a good person to contact?

Isn't it obvious? You just need to move house so you are the furthest away from school. Then move back next year, when they change the rules again. And then back the other way...

OP, snap! We too have a DS1, DS2 with SN, and DD. And we also had a big headache last year with his non-mainstream school and getting there. Not helped by the fact that it feels like DS1 and DD are ALWAYS having to come second to DS2's needs, not that it is DS2's fault of course, but it is upsetting, because as you say, I didn't bl&&dy volunteer for this.

If it makes you feel any better (it won't I fear), oddly, our school situation is mirror-image to yours: owing to unforgivable, unconscionable foot-dragging by LEA years ago on the Statement, it's DS2 who's in an independent school. And yet we had all sorts of hassle with the private company running the school's private bus. As you note, the bus driver himself was absolutely lovely and completely logical about the route. But the jobsworths (in a non-council bus company) set new lows for general idiocy. Things finally got sorted out when I led a splinter faction of us parents into basically setting up our own, separate bus company (I kid you not) at which point the school's contractor suddenly caved in.

Don't you find you get this in all sorts of ways? As in: we've never had a bad experience with an actual GP, specialist, ed psych, surgeon, or indeed nurse in the NHS. But the bureaucrats regularly, despite 10+ inches of documentation in their files about DS2, decide to dig in their heels and re-re-assess DS2 before approving this or that referral, which inevitably then does take place and as I say is lovely. It's just such a waste of their time let alone ours. I've seen doctors and teachers reduced to tears by the jobsworths so no wonder if we are sometimes too.

Have a .

LOL Exexpat that's more like it, proper sensible MN advice

I know I have got myself totally wound up over this, mostly because I don't deal with stupidity well. I want to bang heads together!

We do, vaguely, have a social worker, somewhere...think they took us off the official SW books as 'in need' not 'at risk' or something last year so who knows if anyone has us on their books anymore

FOI requests would be illuminating for sure! I'd love to know the cost of these compliance guys and their cars, do they do anything else all day when the kids are in school, follow someone else? fascinating!

Vivienne - thing is, being late is a major stress for me, I hate being late, I don't appreciate other people being late. I know some people don't worry about being good time keepers but I do and am trying to teach my DC that too. I think it's about respect for the person/place you're going to. But i know i'm probably old-fashioned about that.
To DS1 personally, no i don't suppose it matters if he's late. But I'd hate for the other kids to make comments about him being late when it's totally out of his control. And we try never to make our family life all about DS2's SN if that makes sense?

I have temporarily sorted it, for this week anyway. Our usual babysitter can leave her house early on the way to school, stop off here, I can go with DS1 & DD and she'll see him onto the bus.
If it works ok for him...DS1 normally stays up to see her for a treat when we go out but DS2 is in bed before we leave so not sure how it will go, me heading off & leaving him with a stranger but can only try and see...
If it works well, we may have to carry that on for now, costing us obviously in babysitting (though she is very nice and would probably do it for nothing, but i'd feel bad).
But she is in Y13 and v annoyingly & selfishly probably heading off to uni this time next year (grr!) but who knows what will be going on with buses by then...

Oh CHJR thank you so much, you are so right! (And I love cake!).
It's the over and over yet another battle, and the battles are all nonsense but so wearing.

I had a few experts in GOSH tell me various things about what DS2 should be getting which he isn't, at our last appt, sigh, more to chase up as I'm the one that looks bad when I say I don't know what happened about the OT referral (that I never saw/made/etc)...for eg.

It really is about how the other DC (& us too of course) have to come second to DS2, not his fault, not ours, not any individual specialist. But the admin, the bureaucracy...it grinds you down :(

but if all the dc are on the bus does that mean they are all late for school?

The ones on the bus (ds2 only one of mine on there) go to the sn sch and are not late. But by waiting for that bus to get to my house and ds2 to get on, I am then late getting ds1 to his non-sn school.

are you able to get a taxie to drop your son of at the school, instead of getting a bus?. the council still pay for it but would mean you have a set time that works for you?

our council does it, may be worth having a word?

It's an interesting question that one. Tey have said we could claim for some mileage if we drove him or take the bus. No mention of getting a taxi to take him there.
Would obv be great for timings though the taxi would have to drive in circles for a while or something as he'd be too early for sch!
I think the main prob would be him - he wouldn't get in a car with strangers and go off.

my dad has school runs as a taxie driver and its the same children so wouldnt neserly be different person each week, he has my mum come along to as a "carer" too.

if it was possable, and your son could meet them before hand a few times (which my parents have had to do before aswell)
your council may be different, but it could be worth having a word?

it just seems so silly, they are to support you and your family, not trying to make it harder.

A friend's DS goes to his SN school in a taxi. AFAIK it's the same car and driver every day. Would he be able to cope with that do you think?

If the school don't mind type son being a bit late then what its the problem.

Your not type

Ok it's prob just me but I mind!

Plus it's so unnecessary!

He would learn to cope with a taxi I'm sure. But I'm not sure it's an option on the table anyway.

useless information the OP has explained how she feels about being late ^. For what it's worth, I totally agree with her. It's really unsettling and distrubing for the rest of the class to have a child late every morning, and not fair on that child who misses out on what's happening first thing, and is singled out as being 'the one that's always late' and who doesn't get a nice calm start to the day with everyone else.

JKS I so feel for you. As CHJR says, the professionsal that actually work with the children - that know them as a person, not a number are almost invariably great, but it's the 'systems' they have to work in that drive you to distraction.
Yes, you can see it's a logical starting point that the child who lives nearest gets collected last, so as not to spend a long time on the bus, but it's the inflexibility of it that drives you mad.

Do you have a Family Service Plan (through Early Support) ? They are supposed to deal with situations like this where a family can't get some immovable "system" to work with what the child or family actually need.

would you be able to hire some help? like a sort of morning babysitter? Not ideal I know. Bah!

All three of my niece's children go to the same school a mile away. One of the children had to have her hips and legs encased in plaster (cerebral palsy correction) for 3 months. The council offered this child a taxi to and from school but..........get this........they wouldn't bring the other children too. So niece had to wait for taxi in the morning, put daughter in, then rush a mile to school (walking) with the other two.

In the evening the taxi would pick up child and niece would then have to rush home with the other two where the taxi would have been sitting waiting for 20 minutes for her to get home.

Stupid Council decisions, or what?

Jskltd - I have had similar problems for the past 2 years. I have sent you a PM as it is very long winded.

I work for a council. The way to get action is to a) complain to your councillor/other councillors/MP/MSP - if your own councillor can't help, find out what committees there are dealing with children/families/education and bombard the head of the committee with emails; b) complain to the head of department directly, in writing and by phone if you can; or c) go to the local paper. The first two options involve wearing them down and can be very time-consuming, but they do work.

Sorry to hear about this - it is madness! It doesn't matter that your DS1 is at an independent school that doesn't mind if he's late - it is ridiculous that he has to be late every day. It is just not on.

Oh, and d) if they use FB/Twitter, complain there. In public. That gets them jumping too.

It's nuts.

I have a child with SN. Just recently diagnosed. I am finding the beurocrocy astounding.

I hope you can appeal & get something sorted.

I work in Children's services and agree that its ludicrous.

Going to the paper sounds like a good idea but put an FOI in first. Find out:

The additional annual cost to the tax payer of your DS being picked up first rather than last.

The cost to the taxpayer of the compliance cars and how much they are likely to save by doing their job. If the council pay a flat rate to the bus company then the pick up order should be irrelevant.

Lots Of good ideas thanks.

Have submitted our paperwork for the sen panel which won't meet til next wed so quite a wait now.
I'm drained and feel like we're onto a loser anyway.
At least I have sorted out the mornings for now, though we haven't discussed costs yet with the sitter.

Thing is.... if you don't know the other children and families on your son's route, how do you know resolving the problem for YOU wouldn't cause another family the exact same problem?

It's a common problem for parents of children with SN who qualify for transport who also have children going to m/s schools. I can sort of see why the council won't bend for you in particular; the logistics of then having to bend for every family in the same position would be crazy.
Why don't you ask other parents at your son's school how they deal with it?