Collect and drop off dcs

[everycloudhasasilverlining]

Am I being unreasonable in not wanting to drop dcs at and collect them from stbx h front door(used to be my home:() when he has them for the day??

7,5 and 4. It's just been taken for granted by him that I drop and collect:( not doing it, why should I run around after him still? Sorry, that was a bit of a rant:(

Why don't you talk to him and arrange an alternative?

You both doing one "run" each would seem the fair way. So you drop them with him and then him bring them back to you.

Tell him you're not happy with it and suggest putting new arrangements in place.

no yanbu - and why is he in the home and you and 3 kids had to leave?

I am firm - If he wants to see them then he comes to get them and drops them off too. That said a) he pays no maintenance and b) he lives 55 miles away!!!!
I guess you could share the runs at the very least. But personally I'd make him do the running.

Finding it difficult to communicate-its me, I just can't face him:( I filed for divorce, he didnt like it, spent two weeks being verbally abusive and nasty to me-no holds bared he said what he thought:( finally one eve he pushed me over in front of dcs and I called police and left. Know you are not supposed to leave but I just couldn't do it anymore:( he made it quite clear he was going nowhere and on hindsight I think he forced me out. Now he is seeing dcs which is fine but I don't see why I should take them there when he is not helping me in the slightest with anything:(

Everycloud - you do not need to communicate anymore face to face. He is not your friend. Set up an email address and use that for all communication. I found this immensely helpful and several years on I still use this method only. It works for me. Do not engage in any conversation - just repeat 'you can email me' until it sinks in.

That's what I have done on advice from solicitor, have mailed to say will be in a certain place at agreed time and will be there at collection time. You have a point when you say 'he is not your friend' he isn't, not thought like that but its true, must bear that in mind, thank you:)

Keep strong x

Thank you - your advice and words are much appreciated:)