AIBUI I dont allow grandad unsupervised access to our three small children

[bekywig]

At least 3 beatings with cane in my pre teens. Sexual inuendos in my post teens. Now I have my own children at 42 but don't want him unsupervised with our children. Any thoughts? And does anyone know of any legal issues should he take it that far?

Is he your granddad or there's?

Either way, it doesn't matter. Your reasons sound entirely fair. I doubt there's anything he can do.

Jesus no you are being totally reasonable.

And I don't think grandparents have any legal right at all to unsupervised access however I am no expert.

They're your children not his and he has absolutely no legal right to see them at all.

You can put whatever restrictions on it you like. He has no automatic rights in law.

He can apply to the court for "leave to apply for a contact order". This is a bit of a convoluted process, but if leave is granted he can apply for a contact order in the same way a non-resident parent can. If he has had regular contact with the child it is probable it would be granted.

If you think there is any chance of him doing this, I would seek advice from SS. Get your concerns on record. If there is a documented trail before any court involvement, it will be taken far more seriously and would lead to restrictions (such as supervised contact) if he were successful in his application.

ynbu

i belive grandparents can go to court for contact, BUT only if they have had a big part in their lifes up untill the no access, i also think it only happen with the mothers side?

but in this case, even if he did try he wouldnt get any where.

Don't leave my children alone with my father as he is bitter and twisted. Was manipulative to those he saw as weaker and mentally and verbally abusive. Just don't trust him so make sure I'm always there. Luckily we live far away so visits are infrequent.

They are your children, you get to decide.

YANBU at all. Does he expect unsupervised access? If he's their grandfather (as opposed to yours), is your mum still married to him?

Regarding the legal issues, I can't imagine that a grandparent is legally entitled to unsupervised access. And as long as you allow him to see them, why would he even consider this?

thanks so much for replies. He's my father and him and my mum are divorced. I just dont want the same heartache that I had, to be put on my children by this 'father' of mine who is manipulating and controlling.

Why let him have any contact. Children don't need to be exposed to someone just because they are blood related. He doesn't sound nice so why bother.