To think my boss really needs to chill out!

[LadyMedea]

I'm currently signed off sick. I fully admit that since starting my new job 18 months ago my sick record has been an unmitigated disaster, but that's just bad luck as I've been really ill with chronic health stuff and then pregnancy stuff. It's crap, i feel crap about it, but stressing about it just makes it worse.

I am however generally hard working and reliable and have done work when off sick before to meet deadlines.

My boss just got in touch with a colleague, to get in touch with me, to ask about a piece of work that is due next Friday - its a couple of hours work tops. We spoke on Wed and I said I would definitely see to it even though I was sick - I will also hopefully be back before the deadline.

My boss was communicating from her hospital bed where she has just had major surgery for which she is due to have 4-6 weeks off work.

Am I being unreasonable to think that 1) my boss needs to switch off from work at this point and 2) that she should trust that I will do what I've said I will do as I always have in the past?

You should not be working whilst on sick leave. You can't help that you have had health issues in the past year or so and your employer should be supporting you and not bullying you in this way. They are being unreasonable, not you. Your boss is also compromising her health by working at this time as well. Maybe the bigger issue is the culture of your workplace. Possibly your health issues have not been helped by the pressure that you have been under to work whilst officially too ill to work. You should contact your company's/organisation's occupational health and get the help YOU need to get back to work. In the meantime, please don't push yourself like this - you are off sick for a reason and you need time and space to recover. xxxx

It's been really difficult mainly because my boss doesn't understand illness - a point I think she has just confirmed by working from hospital - lunatic.

I have ME/CFS so 'pushing on through' just makes it much worse. I wouldn't even consider doing any work at the mo, but I'm off on maternity leave in two weeks so there are things that have to be done and it stresses me more to not do them.

Work certainly has made things worse, apart from a couple of days with morning sickness, the only time off in this pregnancy was for anxiety (never been off with it before) which was work induced made worse by hormones.

Being off with the ME last winter was definitely made worse by feeling under pressure to do more.

My workplace is crap, HR are useless, but the big problem is my boss' attitude. She's not horrible just doesn't get it.

I'm so sorry. ME is a real illness and yet some people still seem stuck in the days of yuppy flu. But, my darling, you need to think of your baby now. If you wanted to you could complain of workplace bullying and you would have a good case. Do what you need to do, then enjoy your baby.

I hate to say it, but maybe this experience that she is having may make her realise what illness is like and how it can make you feel - e-mailing and working after a major op WILL have an effect on her recovery. But that is her problem. You have enough of your own. Take care of yourself and your family and your new little one.....they will be there long after work.
xxxxxx