AIBU to think that you cannot 'cure'/manage a paedophile?

[ilovebabytv]

In that that is their sexual preference (as abhorrent and fucking wrong as it is) is no more curable/manageable than being straight/gay?

And therefore leading on from this theory, that once caught they should be locked up either in jail/psychiatric hospital for life, (kept away from public in general) because they are always going to be a risk?

I agree with those who say that paedophilia is a condition that cannot be cured, only controlled.

Hysterical reactions, such as hang them, or lock them up for life, help no one, least of all those who need help to prevent them acting upon their urges or seeking help. Society needs to work in a way that helps paedophiles make the right choices, not the wrong ones.

I have recently had the misfortune to find out that a convicted peadophile who had been 'cured' on his release has just been banged up again.
His family are counting down the weeks until he completes half his sentence and is released again.

I am beyond angry.

I would prefer for him to rot in jail as his family covered up for him and allowed him to mix with my DC.

I hate him and I hate them for allowing this to happen.

He will not be 'cured' again and as long as he has an urge then no child will be safe.

I also know of an convicted paedophile. He is released and put back into jail time and time again. He can't be cured/managed, they have given him too many chances with, in my own opinion, little regard for the general public.

they can't be cured, and it is rare for them to be able to control it. They are a constant risk to the public, always.

I am livid at how the ones caught get chance after chance.

how do you know it is rare for them to control it

have you jumped on everyone you feel attracted too

Not sure if removing testicles removes desire but not all pedophiles have testicles. Some are women.

I know that headinhands, but don't know enough about female anatomy to suggest an equivalent. Anyway, I was just interested.

Its those who can't or don't control it that we hear about. There could be any number of paedophiles who would never act on their desires and it must be awful for them.

But surely the reason we don't "jump" on everyone we fancy is because they are adults who may reject our advances and have the ability to say no - I worry that children are vulnerable and easy prey also a paedophile will often justify their behaviour saying a child was attracting their attention deliberately by smiling and talking (as children do in an innocent way)

rapists will justify their actions

you are confusing the two issues those that abuse (not always a paedophile) and those that do not and control their tthurges

the reason i do not jump on every guy i am attracted to is that i can control my urges not because he will spurn me. i also want him to be attracted to me

The Guardian did an interesting article on this earlier this year:

www.theguardian.com/society/2013/jan/03/paedophilia-bringing-dark-desires-light

The answer seems to be "nobody knows". It does seem to be the case that some adults experience sexual attraction to children and don't act on it, but whether that is a mental disorder resulting from childhood abuse, or whether it's because they're just unlucky enough to be born that way, it's currently hard to say.

I understand the difference but I think there is a fine line and as I said earlier I believe the likelihood of a paedophile acting on their feelings is rising because of the Internet

I really can't believe half the shit that is being said on this thread.

Those poor peadophiles being attracted to children. How awful it must be for them.

Fuck off

There really is far too much sympathy in a lot of these posts, it's fucking sickening.

I worked with this client group this year. Loads of people in the community are convicted pedophiles. Some are managed in mental health services. Most are pretty free. One guy a know is monitored during the day. People just sit with him.

The trouble is, it's all massively expensive. I think a lot of these services will be cut back.

There are big problems with people with learning disabilities and paedophilia too.

Most of the clients I worked with were lovely.

I mean there are big problems MANAGING people with learning disabilities Who are a risk to children

Mainly no one wants to pay for it!

YABU

I work in this field and it is not about 'curing' people, that would imply that it is an illness. It is about teaching men (and women, although my experience is only with men) to manage their behaviour. Most men I have worked with don't want to feel attracted to children and are open to ways of managing there impulsives. As well as this there are lots of external risk management factors that can be put in place to protect the public.

I think there is a misconception in the media that 'peadohphiles' are lurking on every corner. The reality is that most sexual abuse happens within the home by a family member. The reasons men commit offences against children are many and complex. To say they should all be locked up for life is unreasonable. Prison is extremely expensive and committing a sexual offence doesn't mean you have a psychiatric illness.

I mean there are big problems MANAGING people with learning disabilities Who are a risk to children

Mainly no one wants to pay for it!

Not in my experience. The money is always found for that particular (small) group of people in the counties I have worked across. Always.

Ginger no one said that. If someone is born with these urges, and cannot change that, then that IS awful for them. Obviously if they act on those feelings then that is a horrific crime. But one doesn't always lead to the other.

The fact that there are any paedophiles on any corners is too many.
Put yourself in my shoes and then see if you think it is so unreasonable.

Not here - local authority and health and probation are starting to argue about this big time. Whose pot should it come out of ... ?

I can see that pressure is growing to check all potential clients for IQ (so local authority will have to pay) or mental health (so NHS). Police should surely pay for monitoring though but their budgets are slashed. I can see it escalating.

The reasons men commit offences against children are many and complex. To say they should all be locked up for life is unreasonable.

Is it really? I am finding it hard to see this as unreasonable. As long as they are a risk to children then they should be kept away from society, which unless there is an alternative, is locked up in jail.

I personally dont think there is a 'cure' for them, nor a way of managing/controlling them that 100% wont put further children at risk other than keeping them away from society in general. Perhaps I just place childrens' right not to be put at risk higher than the right for a child abuser to try and not abuse further children.

TB

Bullshit

ProudAs said it.

Those poor peadophiles. Why don't you go visit some and give them a big hug to make them feel better.

I wouldn't compare it to being gay.

I also don't care about any studies and percentages and past cases. The risk of reoffending is too great. I wouldn't care how many therapy sessions one had been too, still wouldn't want one anywhere near my child or other children.

I don't care if people think this is hysterical and over the top but hangings too good for them. They don't deserve any second chances, any help. They're a waste of money being in prison and should be put down.

And im talking about all paedophiles/child abusers be they strangers or family members, no distinction in my eyes, all equally abhorrent.

Potential clients are always tested for IQ here anyway. This is what gives them access (or not) to joint health and local authority LD services.