I dont think so but aibu?

[hugsandbutterflies]

So, i was bathing the kids and called on dp to get me a towel for ds2. Dp had said before I put them in that he was going to play the computer so I was under the impression he was not busy.
Anyway he came through with the towel and took ds2 to the living room with him, I was right behind them to quickly get my phone and as dp put ds2 down on the sofa I squeezed past to get my phone. Just as I got it, dp shouted, "watch out for my soldering iron".
It was lying on the floor, no cover, and on, maybe an inch from my foot. I shouted at him, I am so angry he just left it there on, no warning, the big rule is,its only to be used in the kitchen for safety and because the smell makes me sick.
If he just said, sorry I didn't think or something like that I would have got over it quickly but he's adamant I should watch where I'm going and I should of somehow automatically known he was using it and in the livingroom aswel.
We are not speaking now, because he says he has nothing to apologise for.

Sounds like you're both very tense

I'd forget about it & enjoy your evening

It is very unsafe to leave a hot soldering iron lying around on the floor, so YANBU for that.

He knows the kids wouldn't have stood on it as ds1 was still in the bath and and ds2 was just out but I'm supposed to look for myself.
I'm really angry with him right now.

YANBU. A soldering iron would burn your foot just as much as the dc's - it should never be put where ANYONE can stand on it. He's transferring blame on to you because he knows your right but is feeling defensive.

^you're not your

He just says I'm over reacting and he's not sorry as he's done nothing wrong. If i almost burned him I would apologise.

We are having a tough time at the moment and I'm supposed to be trying to save this relationship but it feels like he can act however he wants and if I even hint I'm annoyed with him, I'm a bitch.

YANBU

But are you pissed off at something else he's done?

the children were in the same room as the hot soldering iron? if they are young enough to be bathed and put on the sofa, i am assuming they are not old enough to be trusted around such things. also he has little respect for your safety.

doesn't sound worth saving to me. not if he is like that.

Soldering irons should always be on a table, on something heat-proof. Always.
He was quite stupid to leave it on the floor (not that telling him that would be very helpful!)
YADNBU.

I am pissed of with him for a lot of things at the moment. He's depressed and not himself. He loses his temper so easily and seems to be taking everything out on me. He's off work at the moment and we are maybe spending too much time together but I'm feeling like he's changed into a different person.

A relationship is never going to be 'saved' if only one of you is trying to save it. Why are you the one putting the effort in but not him? Don't know your situation but would posting in relationships help?

I know it can't be saved if he won't try too but he seems to think he is trying. For example, yesterday he spent the whole day doing DIY but instead of saying I'm going to be doing this all day, go do something with the kids, he kept saying, ill be done in 5 and them we can all do something. I bit my tongue let him get on with whatever unnecessary thing he was doing, no moaning. When the kids were asleep he then wanted to spend time with me but I wasn't intrested, which makes me a bitch.

You never leave a soldering iron on the floor, or anywhere near dcs. I use one regularly and they get bloody hot - hot enough for a third degree burn.

I'd be bloody fuming.

There was no way I would of seen it, its his new portable one so no cables its just like a big pen. At least with the other ones I can see a a cable and a unit and it is obvious but this ones just no so in your face. Still angry but this is helping.

Just wish he wasn't so selfish, I'm noticing he puts himself first almost always and it hurts.