To dread dd asking me to listen to her violin practise.

[Bluemonkeyspots]

I know, I'm the worlds worst mum but its torture!

I make all the right noises and tell her how well she is doing but I want to claw my own eyes out.

She has unfortunately inherited mine and dh's lack of not being able to carry a tune on neither a instrument or through song.

Is it even possible to make a tune on a violin without years of private tuition?

God I love her but a whole other year of this (onto the 2nd year now) may push me over the edge.

Aw. YANBU. I am distinctly evil in that I can't abide reading aloud. I just hate the sound of my voice! I also get annoyed by the constant interruptions "But why did the mouse say that Mummy? Why did he?" when the next frigging PAGE WILL REVEAL THE ANSWER!

I say "Well, let's turn the page and see..." all patient...but my guts are churning!

I'm really not musical but this reminded me so much of being a child.

My parents put up with me 'learning' violin for about four years before they let me drop it. 20 minute lessons shared between three of us, once a week, then 15 minutes on my own. I had no clue.

Much later on someone told me that there are some instruments that are quite easy to get an un-painful sound out of relatively early, but the violin isn't one of them: even people who end up being really quite good spend a fair while sounding as if they're murdering cats with cheesewire.

Well, she won't get any better without your encouragement. Nobody ever picked up a violin for the first time and was able to make it sing. It's a tricky instrument and requires a lot of work in order to sound reasonable.

You should be happy that your child has the opportunity to learn.

Hidden OP said she makes the right noises ffs. Not ALL parents are keen on ALL their DC hobbies.

hidden, I read it that she's trying to be encouraging but doesn't know if she/DD are on a hiding to nothing. She wants to know if it's possible for her DD to learn.

I bet it is, btw, but agree with natasha - even if you're no more skilled on the cello, it is deeper so doesn't have quite that brain-liquifying quality.

My parents listened to 4 of us learning the violin....bless them. Well-worth it though..a beautiful instrument.

hiddenhome - you managed to sound like a really scary violin teacher there. i had a sudden vision of my son;s first teacher as I read your post ... and it terrified me.

OP - it is tough. I found that the best thing was to get the children to practise whilst I made dinner. It gets easier.

I say this, and I know that one reason it's all become a bit lax around here, instrument-wise, recently is because I just haven't been able to find the time/will to listen. It is hard sometimes.

Sorry, I should have said that I listen whilst doing dinner because somehow it lessens the pain.*

*Though, obviously, there are days when it's utterly fabulous and a joy and there is no pain ...

LRD: "brain-liquifying quality."

That has made me laugh.

Ear plugs?

Seriously, you're all over reacting and sound totally neurotic. Ds1 learnt the viola and I was so determined to encourage it that I took it up with him!

Ds2 is learning the clarinet and dh has now taken it up too.

You're a bunch of pussies.

thecat - you can tell I know what it sounds like!

My poor dad isn't musical either, and would spend hours trying to 'tune' my lent-out school violin after it'd been bumping on the school bus for an hour. He once broke the D and G strings.

Cross post.

I don't get how anyone is being neurotic? How do you mean?

Isn't the OP just fed up with the sound and wondering if she's doing the right thing?

hiddenhome - Hmmm. I'm not sure calling us a bunch of vaginas is terribly endearing, or furthering your argument. But you go, girl!

the violin is incredibly difficult to get a decent sound out of it when you're a beginner.

My parents were kind enough to tell me when I'd been playing for ten years and was pretty good at it that the first few years were torture They're not generally the encouraging sorts, so I'm amazed they managed to keep their opinions to themselves.

I'll see your violin and raise you a trumpet! Two in fact, just as dd1 was becoming proficient, dd2 took it up...

When you add that to the electric guitar and the saxophone it's not hard to see why the neighbours hate us

Look OP. Ditch the violin. Tell her to listen to Justin Beiber instead. This is all the musical education she needs.

Drums. You can even feel them - they make the earth move.

If she really can't carry or tune, or seem to recognize correct tuning, then the violin is possibly not for her.

I play, and it is a really difficult instrument to get to grips with - she needs to develop muscle memory to know where the right notes are on the strings, and that's going to be very hard if she doesn't have a very good ear.

I would suggest if she wants to play something she goes for something like piano (just hit the right key to get the right note) or a string instruments with frets and therefore guidance for her fingers such as guitar.

Also blue does she not have a tutor? She'll need one for the violin, seriously.

sorry, carry a tune...

I played the flute at secondary school and I'd def. recommend as a DC learning instrument.

cheapish
light and you can put it in your school rucksack
doesn't really need that much tuning
In C so it doesn't need transposing usually

But best of all you don't really need that much puff to get a pleasant sound out. I'm rubbishly unmusical but even I could play pleasent christmas carols/showtunes etc on the flute. All you have to do is blow and press on the right keys.

DH and I were actually pleasantly surprised that DD didn't sound like she was strangling a cat when she started playing violin (she has been playing for a year). I don't think that shows she has any great talent. I think it is more to do with the fact that SIL and my DB,who both inflicted their screeching on DH and I learned violin as children, must have been really bad at it.

My hated task was always listening to them read out loud. Especially by DC3, by which time I knew every sodding Biff, Chip and Floppy adventure off by heart. My heart sank every time I saw the reading folder come out

My son played violin for 3 years (at junior school) and managed to pass his Grade1 exam in the end. It was painful, but with plenty of encouragement to practiice at home ,10 minutes e very day, then half an hour nearer his exam, he was suddenly able to produce a (mostly) tuneful sound! She won't get better if she doesn't practice,so I think if you want her to play, and she wants to continue, you just have to put up with it. It will get better eventually.

My daughter plays flute,(been playing since year 4 juniors...now just gone into 6th form) and will be taking Grade 8 exam after Christmas. It is not cheaper to play, and not particularly easy.You have to have the right shape mouth (this is checked by the flute teacher).Just blowing doesn't get you anywhere, it is not like a recorder! To get a reasonable sound, the cheap ones off e-bay are no good. We ended up paying £500 for a Yamaha,for her to get this far. And they go out of tune ,and need servicing every so often.

Hang on in there! My DD is about to start her fourth year on the violin- somewhere around about year 2 they just seem to 'get it' and the tunes start to flow much easier- she can make it sound really good now but it takes time & practise.