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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To have told someone "it's not nice to litter"

24 replies

ctrlaltdel · 03/09/2013 13:26

I was leaving work when I saw a lady in her sixties coming in the other direction just past the entrance. We made eye contact and as we did she put a banana skin down in the flower bed. I then said to her "it's not nice to litter".

At this point, she came right up to me and started an angry tirade that she was planning to pick up the skin on her way out, that there were no bins nearby and that I should not be accusing someone older than myself but addressing the younger generation instead. I quietly replied I would if I saw them do the same and got into my car and left a bit shaken by the encounter feeling like I'd done something wrong. Should I just keep my mouth shut in future?

OP posts:

NotYoMomma · 03/09/2013 13:30

well if she hadn't left it there and was just putting it down for a bit?

I would not say 'it's not nice to... xyz'

it is rediculously patronising and awful. I would have said (once she was moving) 'excuse me, you have forgotten your rubbish, can you pick it up'

or some such

Original poster

ctrlaltdel · 03/09/2013 13:47

Ok, I agree it was a stupid choice of phrase to have used and it got her back up. It was literally the first thing that came into my head (toddler DC mode probably) and I was just annoyed that she should have dumped the peel there in the first place when there are several bins inside.

OP posts:

Original poster

ctrlaltdel · 03/09/2013 14:00

Would someone really just put down a banana skin for a bit?

OP posts:

Thepowerof3 · 03/09/2013 14:05

Aren't banana skins good for a flower bed?

rockybalboa · 03/09/2013 14:05

Planning to pick it up on her way out? Bullshit. I think you did the right thing, who gives two hoots whether she was older or younger than you.

itsnothingoriginal · 03/09/2013 14:08

No YANBU and I wouldn't have bought her story about picking it up later either!

You're brave - I have often wanted to do the same when I see people chucking their rubbish on the ground but never have the guts!

AFishWithoutABicycle · 03/09/2013 14:14

I wouldn't have said anything but only coz I don't have the balls (Lady garden) to do it.
How dare she say you should resoect your elders when she's acting like a 6 month old that doesn't realise when something is out of her sight it still exists.

mrsfuzzy · 03/09/2013 14:22

good for you for saying something, i speak up too, with regards to her age she should know better anyway! what about respecting our surroundings and the environment, she is hardly setting a good example to any young people watching.

AdmiralData · 03/09/2013 14:54

YANBU. I absolutely loathe littering, right up there with spitting and driving like a twat. YADNBU. Good on you OP, wish I had the balls. I once stood back and allowed a neighbour walking their dog to let said dog poop outside my house and didn't say a word. I just stood there with an open mouth like a guppy :(

DropYourSword · 03/09/2013 14:56

I HATE littering, but I would have thought banana skins and apple cores etc would be OK as they decompose. Wrappers and cans etc are a huge no no!

mrsfuzzy · 03/09/2013 15:01

have a confession to make, someone let their dog poo outside my gate they knew that i'd seen them so as i knew where they lived i put a note through the door saying that if they did not clear it up pronto it would be delivered via their letter box! i know that's horrible but it worked the poo was duly removed, and the culprit now walks his dog on the opposite side of the road - result! i know it could have gotten nasty but i am all for standing up to social bullies and the like.

SillyTilly123 · 03/09/2013 15:01

My nan (in her 80's) always moans to me if she sees someone littering, yet she seems to think its fine if she does it!

In fact a few years back she saw a school kid (teen) drop a pizza box on the floor and she tutted etc then 2 mins down the road she threw her bus ticket away. I always tell her off lol.

GrimmaTheNome · 03/09/2013 16:16

YANBU, and OK phrase on the spur of the moment. If she'd really been planning to pick it up again she wouldn't have got so angry. As to not saying anything because she was older - she's setting a poor example isn't she?

plentyofsoap · 03/09/2013 16:31

I hate that people drop litter, well done. I once slipped on a bananna skin left on the pavement years ago, no joke I went bloody flying!

NotYoMomma · 03/09/2013 16:34

I didbt mean put it down for a bit as in to rest but I dont know if shemight have been planning to sit down or something or eat a sandwich etc...

I just think the wording probably induced the rage

TwoAndTwoEqualsChaos · 03/09/2013 16:49

YANBU, and, in fact, well done to you! I wish I always challenged when I saw such things. At the moment, I am experiencing more bad manners/rudeness from older people rather than youths, which I find much harder to deal with.

nickelbabe · 03/09/2013 16:51

i think you only said "it's not nice to litter" because you were being over-polite to an older person.

you should have said "please pick your litter up as littering is against the law"

she was BU as she shouldn't have done it, and YANBU to say something, but I think you should have been less passive and just told her that she was in the wrong.

nickelbabe · 03/09/2013 16:53

I did once pick up a piece of litter someone had dropped in front of me and said "you seem to have dropped something"
they didn't know what to say, but mumbled thanks

i am well aware it could have gone the other way "i did it on purpose" but then I would have said - "the bin is there, please use it"

specialsubject · 03/09/2013 17:30

good for you. If there is no bin, you carry it until you find one.

dirty cow. Serve her right.

Original poster

ctrlaltdel · 03/09/2013 19:13

Thanks for the support! She'd definitely put it down and was a couple of paces away from it when I spoke to her. I usually keep away from any confrontation and just give people a judgey-pants glare but this time it did annoy me enough to say something.

Hopefully, she did feel guilty enough that she picked it up on her way out later

OP posts:

livinginwonderland · 03/09/2013 19:30

Banana skins/apple cores are good for plants. If it had been plastic or something, then fine, but YWBU to moan about something that's not doing any damage.

Capitola · 03/09/2013 19:36

Hmmm, tricky. I agree with you OP but -

My husband chucks apple cores out of his car window into the undergrowth. I think 'litter', he thinks 'biodegradable'.

I think nickelbabe's comment might have been more effective. I did this once when crossing the road and a guy in a car in a queue lobbed out a load of wrappers onto the road.

I picked them all up, went up to his window and with a huge smile said, 'You dropped something!' and threw them onto his lap.

Original poster

ctrlaltdel · 03/09/2013 20:44

Yep, agree with using a different response if I get into the same situation again so I'll bear that in mind.

The lady did not mention the biodegradable qualities of the banana skin at any point in her rant against me so I'm guessing that the environment was not high on her agenda when she dropped the skin down. (If she had just said it was biodegradable I may have been more understanding...)

OP posts:

mrsfuzzy · 03/09/2013 20:57

biodegradable or not, it's not really on to drop litter anyway.

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