To think DH is not being 100% truthful with me?

[spg1983]

DH is a really laid-back person, and is waaaay too relaxed about some things, including his health. He is normally a very healthy person who plays sport regularly and eats well, but when there is an issue (eye infection etc) he takes so long to get himself to the doctors that the problem has got worse and needs much more treatment than it would have done if caught earlier.

Anyway...DH's dad died young, he had cancer. Not sure where on his body it started but MIL has said that he had some moles removed as they were cancerous and that the doctor had noticed that as a child, DH also had the same type of mole so he should be careful in case they start to show signs of being cancerous.

So...for months now, MIL and I have been pestering DH to go to the doctors, booking appointments for him but he's always had to cancel for whatever reason but finally this week he went to the doctor. This was only because a friend who has recently had moles removed and is fighting cancer saw his back and expressed concern over a couple of DH's moles.

When DH got home he showed me 2 moles that the doctor had highlighted as needing to be 'kept an eye on'. The doc had measured them and taken pictures, so had done a pretty thorough job. I asked DH if the doctor had said anything about them being suspicious and he said there was nothing to worry about. Later on though, he dropped into conversation that he had to go back in 4-6 weeks for the doc to have another look and re-measure the moles, but insisted there was no suspicion of anything being wrong and it was just precautionary.

AIBU to wonder why the doctor is leaving such little time between checks? Or have we just got a very conscientious doctor? We've just moved surgeries so don't know the doctors that well...

not an expert, but I saw my GP about a new getting bigger mole and he wanted to see me again in a month. But he seemed quite laid back about it, so I assumed that was a standard "keep an eye on it initially" length of time to go back.

Growth is an indicator of malignancy; suspicious moles will grow quite fast, so the short gap between checks is to remeasure them- if they have grown in that time they are definitely suspicious and need fast treatment.

Sounds like the doctor is being thorough. The moles may look normal and the GP just wants to rule out all possibilities. If they were instantly suspicious upon first inspection your DH would have been referred already.

I've had two moles removed and the doctor decided they had to go the very first time he saw me.

Sounds like you have a good and efficient doctor who is following procedure.

Skin cancer is not an hereditary cancer so don't worry about your FIL's history.

I had a mole removed after one visit to the doctor. It wasn't really that bad but it was itchy. Doc said oh, we'll just take that off, you can't be too careful with moles and I was booked in the following month. It was sent off for tests and nothing to worry about.

Just make sure he does go back to the doctor in 4-6 weeks.

Nancy66 Skin cancer is not an hereditary cancer so don't worry about your FIL's history.

Around 10 % of melanoma cases are due to inherited susceptibility. There are at least two genes and another chromosome region (that contains a gene as yet unidentified) associated with an increased risk of melanoma. Having a first-degree relative with a history of melanoma increases your risk to 2-3 times that of the normal population.

However, that's not to say that OP's FIL had a genetic susceptibility to melanoma (or even that his skin cancer type was a melanoma).

OP, the doctor is undertaking normal surveillance, to check for - and hopefully, rule out - quick growth which would indicate treatment.