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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

How much keep should my child pay?

20 replies

ChillySundays · 01/09/2013 22:34

My DC works irregular hours (anything from 15 hours to 30 hours a week) at minimum wage so I can't charge a set amount. Am thinking that a percentage figure is better but I don't know what percentage this should be. Could really do with some advice. Thank you

OP posts:

Original poster

ChillySundays · 01/09/2013 22:38

OP posts:

flipchart · 01/09/2013 22:39

I'm not sure.
My DS has just started an apprentiship and will be earning about £125 a week I think.

I am taking £40 a week of him. However what he doesn't know is that I am putting it into a savings account for him so tht I can give the whole amount back to him as a leg up when becomes to leave home.

He is saving £40 a week.

musicposy · 01/09/2013 22:40

How old are they? There's a lot of difference between a 17 year old also studying and a 23 year old doing nothing else with their free time.

Original poster

ChillySundays · 01/09/2013 22:46

She's 18. While she was at college I didn't take anything off her but now she has left she needs to start paying something. (Of course minimum wage at 18 is less than at 21.)

OP posts:

inkyfingers · 01/09/2013 22:47

If they're still in full time education, I'd prefer to let them keep most of it as pocket money. 10% would be good as gesture that stuff costs. But only more when it's a ft job post-18.

chesterberry · 01/09/2013 22:58

How much money does she need to cover necessary expenses (food, clothes, travel) and how much do you think is a reasonable amount for her to have left over for leisure time or to save? Your percentage should probably reflect this, if you're providing all meals and your child doesn't have to pay bus/rail fares or run a car then you can probably charge a higher percentage than if they have to pay travel costs or provide their own lunch whilst at work etc.

I would guess maybe 20-30% of their salary would be fair but I think a lot depends on how much money would be left over - taking 20% from someone only earning £40 a weel leaves them with a lot less spare cash for necessities and leisure than 30% from someone earning £200 so how much money she will have left after she pays her keep probably needs to be considered.

musicposy · 02/09/2013 05:07

Given that NMW for 18 yo is a fiver an hour and some weeks she has 15 weeks work -£75? Iif you can afford it I wouldn't be taking anything.
However, I wouldn't be paying for anything either, other than basic food. So mobiles, driving, leisure activities, clothes, presents for family birthdays, room redecorations, any extravagant food etc etc I wouldn't be funding.
If you are really struggling I'd take £15 to £20 a week regardless of hours to cover food and leave it at that.

Lilacroses · 02/09/2013 05:12

My friends take£10 for every £50 their Dd's earn. They are in pt jobs while studying. The girls don'tseem to think that's unfair,they take pride in paying their way like I did as a teenager.

lastnightiwenttomanderleyagain · 02/09/2013 05:55

My mum always taught me the rule of thirds - if you can spend a third on rent and bills, a third into savings and the remainder as disposable income then you'll be fine. Yes, there have been times when the third on rent and bills has proven tricky, particularly when starting out and wages are often low with high living expenses, but I've always found it a good rule to work to.

So I would suggest 30-35%.

It also depends how much you're trying to prepare her for when she leaves home - although her income may fluctuate, her outgoings are unlikely to. you might want to base the amount on her total monthly take home and do it either as one lump at the end or as equal payments each week.

flipchart · 02/09/2013 07:08

My rule is a third as well. I said early on that itake £40 from DS and he saves £40,

In reality he is saving £80 a week as I. Am putting my share of 'housekeeping' as my mum called it away.

Original poster

ChillySundays · 02/09/2013 08:10

Thanks for all you replies. I am hovering between 20% or 25%. She pays for petrol for her car and the car tax but we pay for the (very hefty) insurance and the repairs. I also pay her mobile. She is a bit of a spender so I feel she should pay something towards expenses. Maybe if she starts saving will look at it again

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MortifiedAdams · 02/09/2013 08:14

Id go for 20%, and make her pay her phone bill every month too!

HappyMummyOfOne · 02/09/2013 08:21

Nothing personally, cant imagine charging my child to live in their own home.

If i thought they were being wasteful i might take a little and save it for when they got their own place and give it back so that they could use towards furnishing it.

ILoveAFullFridge · 02/09/2013 08:35

IMO she shouldn't pay rent to her parents. But she should be responsible for her own bills (ie mobile and repairs if she has damaged the car) and she should contribute to the household (ie carrying her weight doing the chores at the very least, and doing the shopping from time to time).

If she's on MW, then paying her car insurance while it is teenage-high is being a helpful supportive patent, but paying her mobile bill is not giving her the opportunity to learn to budget and be responsible for her outgoings.

Isthisoneleft · 02/09/2013 08:41

I agree with the pp who said about paying own bills/costs rather than rent.

I would get her to pay 20% of her car insurance or an affordable amount rather than rent.

BMW6 · 02/09/2013 08:46

I believe it is your child's interest to learn how to budget and be responsible financially, so I would ask for 25% of take home pay towards home expenses.

Yonihadtoask · 02/09/2013 08:48

She isin't in education now? So this is her only job?

In that case I would probably want her to pay 20% of her take home? but would average it out, so that it was a set amount. That will teach her how to budget for the lean weeks, as well as the better paying weeks.

I think she should be paying for her own mobile now, and something towards the car expenses.

If she were in education still, and this was a part time job, then maybe I would leave her with more cash in her hand.

My first job at 17 yo paid out £42 per week- I paid £10 per week to my parents - and paid for everything else myself. Driving lessons, clothing, travel. (this was in the mid 80s, there weren't any mobile phones :) )

zingally · 02/09/2013 14:15

Flipchart - Friends of mine did this for their daughter. I thought (and still think) what a lovely gesture it was. :) I know daughter was thrilled to receive the money back after a year. I think it was about £1200 all in.

livinginwonderland · 02/09/2013 14:40

She should be paying her own expenses. If she has a car, she should be paying insurance (monthly, so it's not a huge lump sum), MOT, tax and petrol, and her own phone bill. However, I wouldn't require her to pay rent if she was paying all those expenses.

Original poster

ChillySundays · 02/09/2013 18:44

One thing to bear in mind is that once they leave college the child benefit stops so I am losing that although I have a younger child so only losing £40 rather than £80. I have said I will continue to pay the mobile until the end of the contract which is only for a few more months if it was any longer she would be paying it now. It is trying to get the balance right so that she able to save some money - car will not run for ever so she needs to be thinking about saving money for that. Insurance is £1500 so even monthly it is a not a small sum even monthly. Realistically her hours will tend to be the nearer the 15/20 hours so she will average £100 per week.

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