Something REALLY wasn't right with this

[BrevilleTron]

I have just finished a 13hr shift at LandRover and went to a local town to meet my mate.
Whilst walking through town I see an old lady dive in front of a bus to pull a toddler away just in the nick of time.
Child is hysterical.
No one seems to be with him. He keeps trying to run back into the road.
He doesn't know where dad is and mum is 'at home'

He spots his big brother and wants to go over to him.
Me and another mum take him over. Old lady goes about her business.
His brother is 3

I phoned 999 identified myself ( in uniform so name on shirt) told them the problem and was told to stay with both children until police arrive.

We waited for 40 minutes. Had to stop older brother running off. He clearly had some SN ( both were adorable but couldn't tell us anything other than their first names)

Mum turns up with toddler and approx 1 yr old in buggy.
Tells us 'they opened the door and ran out'
She said she had called the police and had the neighbours looking out for them.
We ask her to stay with us until the police come.
She agrees.

Now I once lost DD aged 5 in Asda for 10 minutes.
I was a crying hysterical wreck who threw my arms round her and nearly crushed her! It aged me 20 years!

This mum just did not react! No hugs. No real admonishment other than 'you shouldn't have done that'
We were still stopping the older one running off while she was there!

So AIBU (or Was IBU as I did) to tell the police (as they approached me saying 'you called us' that something didn't add up. She just didn't seem bothered by the fact her two year old had nearly been killed.
Now I do appreciate that I am seeing a snapshot and that she may have been in shock but it didn't seem right.

So MN do I need to de-wedge the judgy pants?

Not at all. I'd have shook her senseless, sounds bloody scary.

She could well have been in shock though, you just don't know. Could be at home sobbing now at the thought of what could have happened. Could be sat watching telly with a cuppa.

Sounds like shock and probably completely being over whelmed with 3 young children, one with possible SN.

I do try and give the benefit of the doubt. I've had parenting moments that I'm sure people have witnessed and judged.
It was just the way she barely even acknowledged them other than seeing that they were alive. No hugs.
Nothing.

It may have been shock causing her to act like that or maybe she is neglectful. You can't tell. However it is likely that the police will submit a report to SS and they may follow it up with a visit just to check things out.

YANBU to have told them your concerns. It may not be correct, as you say it was just a snapshot, but they will be better placed to make a judgment on that and have the opportunity to make observations because of what you have told them.

Perhaps she has Sn of her own? A friend of mine loves her children dearly, but would react like this in a similar scenario.

What did the police do when they arrived?

probably a combination of shock and the exhaustion of having 3 under 5's and one with SN.

none of us can know- it's a very odd situation that hopefully none of us have to go through. you did the right thing telling the police that and hopefully they will inform the right people and if she is known to any of the agencies then she will be offered the support she needs- if any.

a few weeks ago my 4 year old 'disappeared' from the house. I had sent him upstairs to get his pyjamas for the bath and when he didn't come back down after a few minutes I went up looking for him, I called and called searched under beds, wardrobes, under tables. I called ds1 in from outside and we took half the neighbours houses each but no-one had seen him, we went to the park across from our house and I Know I looked calm when I was asking people if the had seen my 4 year old and they were looking at me like I was a piece of crap for losing my child- I was hysterical on the inside- my brain was struggling to form the words I needed to ask those people if they'd seen him but I knew I needed to stay calm til I found him otherwise ds1 would go into meltdown and I would give in to the panic and not know what to do. we went back home to phone the police and I heard this tapping coming from my airing cupboard and there was ds2 sitting grinning up at me. I stayed calm then aswell because if I had let go of my emotions then I would have scared the shit completely out of him. I did bollock him, loudly and angrily after I had hugged him and bathed him and nipped out for a smoke. but I needed to hold onto that outward calmness until the inner shitstorm of panic had gone. I didn't sleep for a few days after that out of guilt and the 'what could have happened' thoughts. things don't always look like what they are.

I left them to it. Didn't want to hang around and gawp. Asked the cops if they needed me further and they said no

So I consulted the nest of vipers
none of you are vipers really

And having read all the replies you have come up with things I hadn't considered. So thank you all.
My judgy pants are off and I'm just content that no-one died and two children are reunited with their parents.

Thanks for letting me sound off and thanks for your points of view
< I luffs you vipers>

The police took 40 minutes? THAT is unreasonable.

To be fair to the police there was a bad accident blocking the road.

the police probably were a bit more 'relaxed' about time (i.e; didn't blue light it there) because OP was staying with the DC til they got there. she had given them her name so it would be a bit nuts for her to hurt them or run off with them after having done that