to think this alone is a dealbreaker

[stillbusy84]

So our last dd was unplanned. She is 10 months now and is still not sleeping through. In the early days during a bad episode (d)h sais we should have terminated the pregnancy. This hurt so much for many reasons. Anyway i let it go as a in the heat of the moment thing.
However he did it again yesterday because she started crying as our meals arrived whilst eating out. This was in front of our other dc too.
I feel like our marriage is over. He seems to have become so selfish. Valuing his sleep over everything. Has slept the last 3 nights in same room as ds. I have had to share with dd and baby.yesterday was the last straw. I was shattered as dd has been waking 3 times per night. He didn't even surface till 11.
Aibu to think it's over.

Yanbu :(

Children are damaged by such comments and he's not even being a decent enough husband.

didn't want to be kept awake by me getting up to feed /soothe dd.

Oh the poor thing!
He wasn't even gettin up FFS!

I have had to wake up every 30 min when DS had D&V for a couple of nights and not having DS was the last thing in my mind.

He deserves a life of uninterrupted sleep on his own.

That is a disgusting thing to say. I would maybe have forgiven him for saying it when you just found out you were pregnant but anything after that baby was born is plain spiteful and in front of other kids is just plain nasty.l
I wouldn't leave though I'd make him leave.

mrstp he does work hard and is the sole wage earner.
However, that is about it.
I know its over but its hard to make the split after 15 years.
I know i have to do it though.

He must be very rich if you are still with him.

lotsofdirections Your dh sounded lovely
Sorry for your loss
Op your dh is a disgrace

First step made then. You know it's over. I've been divorced, I know the first step is shitty. What is the second step? Seek legal advice?

So, will he be saying this to her when she is 14 and wanting to go out with her friends, dressed inappropriately and answering back when asked to change?

Will he say it to her when she asks for help to go to uni and the financial strain stops him from doing something he wants to do?

Get rid, so he cannot harm her in this way.

You are doing the right thing OP it must be incredible hard but you are doing the right thing for your children. They will be much happier for it.

YANBU I would have got rid after the first time he said it, and pushed for the cost of therapy for all DCs Due to his attitude in the divorce after citing emocional abuse as the cause for the breakdown of the marriage. That's EA of the DCs as Well as you.

Thank you ladies. Will be glad to return home from our holiday so i can make plans. Today we were out and got separated. Dd later told me dh said i was stupid because of the mix up.
I can see now this is emotional abuse and me and the dc deserve better.

Roll on tomorrow.

You and your DC deserve so much better than this idiot OP.