AIBU or is DH?! It's him for sure. WRT piggies...

[AliBingo]

Finally I have a situation where I can post a topic asking if IABU or DH :)

Were messing about with DD (1yo) earlier and playing Humpty Dumpty etc then I told him to do "This Little Piggy" - she loves that game and giggles like mad.

So he took her foot and started off with "This Little Piggy Went to Market" on her little toe

He then did the second smallest toe with "This Little Piggy Had None" so perhaps he's beyond hope.

But on the first point, I told him it was completely wrong and that he has to start with the big toe and work his way down to the little one for the wee-wee-weeing home and he thinks there's nothing wrong with his way.

What sort of family did he grow up in? And what sort of man is he? Am seriously thinking about LTB. So shocked.

So, AIBU?

I will show him this thread later and we'll try and decide on steps forward.

LTB!

Definitely big toe first. There's no hope for him I'm afraid.

DH is in denial, he just said wtf. How can I get through to him.

What in the world? I'm American, and even I know it goes big toe first!

I recommend Relate....I never say LTB. Even in instances like this where it is so, so obvious.

He started with the little toe?!

How on earth does he do Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes?

This is borderline abusive.

He started with the little toe?!
^^

How on earth does he do Head, Shoulders, Knees and Toes?

Mushroom, arf

You need to stage an intervention OP. This behaviour isn't right at all.

If you start with the little toe, how on earth do you then elaborate in order to increase anticipation with each repetition? "And THIS little piggy... The littlest one of all... The teeny weeny little one... Went wee-wee-wee all the way home!" Doesn't work with "this little piggy... The biggest one of all..."

Well-known fact: little children like littlest things best.

Wow :(

Pink, porky flag

LTB

I'm sorry, but you actually have a child with this man?

You have to think of your poor child. You can't let her grow up thinking that this is any way acceptable. You owe it to her to LTB,

I know, I am in a turmoil.

Will wait until things have calmed down a bit then try Mushroom's excellent suggestion (thanks!)

Be brave

How can a big toe go weeeee weeee weeee? you need to be a soprano to weeee. Big toes are tenors at best. No wonder there's a bunch of threads today about people being shocked by mn.

Op maybe cbt would help your dh.

My friend says this little piggy had roast beef. We were always told bread and jam.

I imagine your DD is currently on the phone to Childline?

LTB - he's clearly a maniac!

Well Ali I snapped this thread open fearing there was some kind of guinea-pig abuse going on.
My relief was incandescent until I realised you are talking about TOES.

I'm an NHS Podiatrist. I'm on LEAVE
The only toes I want to think about are MY OWN .

So for that reason alone YABU.

And yes , your DH is wronger than King Wrong of the Wrong people

Bread and jam? That's just wrong. Thats a three syllable phrase in a two syllable space!

Ours is "this little piggy had roast beef, this little piggy had Quorn"

I change what the piggy had to eat each time because a pig eating beef sounds fucked up. Ice cream, cheesecake, etc

There's only one way forward to salvage this op, your dh has to do all the baby music groups from now on.

You get the peace of mind knowing that he will be singing the correct words and you get to escape the torture that is baby music groups

Your poor DH has obviously been deeply deprived as a child and denied proper 'this little piggy-ing'. It's the MIL's fault.

I'm shocked and saddened (possibly even disgusted) to read this...

You poor thing.

I just asked DH and he made a suggestion - OP ask your DH to do "I'm a little teapot". If your DH takes his willie out to be the spout, LTB :-)

Obviously, it's the littlest piggie that goes "wee wee wee"!

Just be lucky he knows the words. I once ear wigged on my DH doing the piggies and he totally fudged the middle ones...