To not see a problem with *hugs* or one or two kisses at the end of a message?

[HaveIGotPoosForYou]

I have seen a fair few MNetters complaining about offering hugs, hands to hold or putting one or two kisses at the end of a comment being 'unmumsnetty' and 'yuck'. I don't see what is wrong with it.

I can see why it would be weird if someone was commenting on what everyone had for lunch, but most of these are in the relationships, mental health, general health, childbirth etc sections and it seems perfectly natural to me if someone is In pain, grieving or something else traumatic has happened that these things would be offered.

AIBU here?
If so, why?

I sometimes hug but never kiss, if somebody has posted and they are feeling rubbish a reply and a wee hug isn't doing anybody anyharm and if it makes other mumsnetters boak then meh I dont care, it is much better than calling somebody a cunt which is used all over the place on here

and of course I do not go up and Hug randoms in rl typing down a hug is just offering sympathy and empathy imo

It's nothing to do with education or anything else.

It's purely because loads of other forums are full of people being sugary to each other and it's like drowning in syrup.

I think people just mean 'I'm not being an insincere twit, I actually mean this'. Not sure why that should make anyone cringe, though I guess it's a bit overused.

I don't understand people who have to end every message with a 'x'. It comes across as so insincere, especially when they are saying something a bit nasty.

Such as:

"You sound a bit needy. x"

If it's appropriate to the thread then I see no harm in people typing ((hugs)) if they want to. I wouldn't because I am not a huggy kissy type person in RL.

Also prefer that mumsnet isn't all hugs/huns/xxxxx because when I do post for advice I prefer to have thought out responses rather than "aww hun ((hugs))"

That sounds as if I'm contradicting myself, I meant, I see no harm in people typing ((hugs)) after leaving their comment (A comment that isn't awww hunni )

People I have notice also say that about text messages.My messages always end in Xx so people know it's me. On here rarely do I put kisses but I will send hugs especially when someone has had bad newsor a tough time.

I am not a fan.

I really hate kisses on texts, all of my friends do it on every bloody text.

no I get you ABF aww hunni ((hugs)) is just meh and nobody has actually said anything

YY, I agree AF (you cunt) - I've been on forums where the norm is that if you see a thread, you post quickly to say 'aww, hugs, hun' before you launch into whatever you wanted to say.

If we all did that MN would be nine times bigger than it is and would take seven hours to load a page.

AF? ABF.

Of course, MN would also be a lot smaller if I didn't constantly brainfart and double post.

how do we handle aww hunni in real life I know a few I just --twitch- smile at them I now seem as if im contradicting myself too

I love, love, LOVE how the typo looks as if you're calling AnyFucker a cunt!

And yes the quick stupid response then a more in depth one would be very annoying.

mrsjay, a lot of my friends and the school mum's do the hunni thing in rl. I just smile through gritted teeth pleasantly and carry on.

you just have too I spose as you cant stab them in the eye or owt like that

Oh, shit, it does look as if I randomly decided to namecall AF. Whoops.

I don't mind the huggy people in RL. I hug, partly cos one of my mates routinely hugs everyone hello and goodbye. But I don't also sit down in the cafe with them and say 'right, tell me straight, DH was buggering a goat last night and I'm not sure my marriage can survive, also, I used the disabled loos just now, am I doomed?'.

I mean, it's not totally the same as sitting down with your mates for coffee in terms of politeness vs honesty.

I'm not a big fan of , especially 'unmumsnetty' ones.

If a post warrants the need to give a virtual hug then you don't need to justify it with the unmumsnetty crap. Be confident in your virtual hug giving!

I quite like little xxx's. to me they just convey compassion and a general kindly feeling to other posters, and that's a nice thing, especially when it can be difficult to convey your intention through words on a screen.

there is no such thing as unmumsnetty! who made those rules? sod that. do what you like.

hugs xxx

Do what you like and prepared to be judged for it but there is such a thing as unMumsnetty activities.

Those would be textspeak, bad spelling, tickers, hunni etc and indeed hugs and kisses at the end of each post.

We bring out the tar & feathers for those who end txtspk posts with xxxxx

I don't want to hug or kiss people I don't know, whether in RL or online. I went to a party given by French people recently and had to mwah mwah everyone. It was traumatic.

cote i can't spell and my grammar has some clutching pearls maybe im not a mumsnetter after all i need a hug

I was watching real housewives yesterday they all mwah mwah and they hate each other it was quite sinister

Nah, it's judging spelling/grammar that's unmumsnetty mrsjay. It never goes down well - on forums like CiF it seems to be totally acceptable for people constantly to be sniping 'ooh, I think you will find you ended that sentence with a preposition, I cannot possibly take you seriously'.

I have to say, thank god we don't do that - it is seen as bad form, isn't it, to attack the spelling/grammar rather than the content?