AIBU to be annoyed that PIL spend far more on DGD than DGS?

[sunshineandclouds]

NC for this one.

PIL live in a different country to us but very close to their DD and DGD. They visit 2-3 times a year and we visit twice.

This is why I am upset: everytime they visit and buy anything for DS they make sure they also buy for their DGD and as I'm sure they buy for her at home as well it feels like they are buying far more for her than my DS.

It's not that I want them to spend lots of money it just feels like their showing favouritism towards DGD and this is unfair on DS.

AIBU?

Do I have this correct?
Your DS and their DGD live in different countries?
When your PIL visit, they buy your DS treats/toys/gifts and buy for their DGD at the same time?
But you are annoyed because you think the DGD gets other treats on top of these and you would like your DS to get them too?

The point is that when they are with you and your ds, they buy for him. That already puts him in a pretty good position in how he is treated by his grandparents.

If they are the sort of grandparents that buy for their grandchildren when they are with them, then you are right, and they probably do end up buying more for their GD. That just means that they see her more, not that they love her more. They visit you, which must be expensive if you live in different countries, and that shows they love their grandson as well.

You are being unreasonable if you are counting the cost of what other people spend. That's not nice. And, you should never confuse stuff with love.

You are not being unreasonable if you think that your in-laws are playing the favourite game. But I don't know what you can do about it.

Well you obviously DO want them to spend more money on your DS because you are complaning that they spend more on the other child!

They make the effort to come and see him 2-3 times a year! What do you think that must cost?

Out of interest, how is it that you live in different countries? Who moved away?

I don't care about the cost at all, its about him feeling they want to buy more things for his cousin than him. Not the monetary value. I don't want him to feel they don't care as much just because they don't live near us. DP moved away before DS was born.

It sounds completely normal to me. They visit you in a different country and buy present and see things to buy his cousin back at home. I don't see why you need to compare.