To feel demoralised and turned off.

[BeeBiscuit]

I like less sex than DP. Used to be different but life changes. I thought couples often varied and would maybe discuss, or one grit their teeth. Anyways, we have sex once or twice (sometimes more)a week but have not done the deed for 5 whole days (!) My partner made his displeasure at no sex last night clear by sighing,puffing, rolling over etc so i didn't sleep. We had been at a theme park for 2 days with 3 kids and frankly i was knackered!Today in a very blunt way he has gone on and on about how he cant trust me as I gave him a verbal come on and didn't follow through on it. Very loud, shouty and aggressive. Muttery comments out of ear shot Not happy and has made that clear. When I asked "So you want me to have sex just because you want it" he couldn't respond. How do you deal with this - I don't know what the "normal" way is. He just shouts at me. AIBU to feel under pressure and AIBU to be upset and turned off?

Thankyou ops, please help me deal with this xx

You poor thing. This is horrible behaviour from him, truly horrible. Don't give in to his demands. If he won't discuss it properly like an adult then let him sleep on the sofa and slam doors all he likes.

Rise above, rise above.

thanks. your comments are keeping me sane. its so reassuring to know that I am not mad x

Don't be sad, be angry

His behaviour says far more about him than about you. And it basically says he's a bully and a jerk.

i would just treat this as the ridiculous behaviour it is. i would laugh at him and say when he's willing to discuss it like a grown up, who cares about their partners feelings then you will be happy to, but till then he can strop about all he likes and frankly he's making a real tit of himself.

This behaviour says nothing about what you're worth, it says everything about what he's worth.

Jeez.
Explain to the childish man him :
a) he gets sex when he's kind, thoughtful and you are both in the mood. Moody sulks/ shouting do not put you in the mood.
b) to go and spend a bit of time in his own with a box of tissues.

Thanks All ! The situation is far from sorted but the advice you have given me has so far helped Xxxx

Sounds dreadful OP

He sounds horrible and very childish!

Definitely do not have sex if you don't want to. This would be a very bad road to go down.

Tell him he is being rediculous and immature and that his behaviour is the exact opposite of a turn on. It turns you off sex very fast.

If he wants you to want to have sex with him he will need to work on making you feel happy, relaxed and valued. Not overworked, pressured and nagged.

Thanks OPs, tbh think the only reason we are still together it the fact we have friends staying. He has slept downstairs since, but last night it all kicked off really horribly whilst guests there. I overheard him saying that he kept having paranoid thoughts about me sleeping with someone else. Now worried tbh. I haven't got the energy for one sex life let alone two .

The poor lamb has gone without for 5 days! Oh Lordy! My poor husband hasn't had more than hugs and kisses for almost 20 weeks as I'm constantly puking and feeling less than sexy because of it. We've talked about it like adults and even though I know he is sad that he is missing out on he intimacy I also know that he will stick to his word and not pressure me in to anything. Think mostly he just doesn't want to get thrown up on. It takes two people or more teehee to DTD, and they should both be up for it not jus doing it from some twisted sense of duty or because they've bee bullied.