to think this is an ultimatum?

[mummytowillow]

My parents have told me something quite serious about my nan who is very elderly.

It's caused a lot of problems in the family but doesn't involve or impact on me.

The person it does involve lives with my nan and is there occasionally when I go to see her with my daughter. We stay 20 mins and just chat. My DD adores her.

My parents told me this info because they want me to disown my nan and stop DD seeing her.

They said they told me to 'see where my priorities lie'. I laughed and said I'm not taking sides and will continue to see her.

There is no risk to my DD so why should I stop just because their not happy.

Is it an ultimatum and should I ignore?

^ more info please.

She's taken sides with some lies the other person has said.

She can't see the wider picture, its nothing criminal or to do with kids etc.

My parents are very unforgiving and itd their way or the highway.

If its something quite serious, but you also say it's that she has taken sides over some lies, then it sounds quite petty really.

It is an ultimatum over nothing, so I would be tempted to ignore the ultimatum, and if that's not possible I'd be cutting contact with the person who issued it.

Well, you are an adult and you are under no obligation to obey your parents. Whether you are doing the 'right' thing or not, I have no idea (don't know what this Other Person has done/not done/said). What, exactly, are your parents going to do if you say, you're entitled to your opinion, I'm entitled to mine and I refuse to stop seeing these people.

Your parents sound like bullies and very petty to 'see where your priorities lie- sounds like you'd be next on the list if you annoyed them!

Can clarify who has told there lies, your nan or the person living with her?