To ask this mum where she bought ds's present so I can take it back?

[LiegeAndLief]

Ds got a very lovely thoughtful birthday present from a school friend which he really likes. Unfortunately, we had bought him the exact same thing for his birthday which he had already opened and played with by the time he got the present from the friend, so we can't return the one we bought.

It is part of a range. Would it be extremely rude to text the mother and ask her where she bought it, so that we could exchange it for something else in the same range? I don't really know her at all other than the odd hello at the school gate, but I have her number because she left it when she dropped her son off at ds's party.

Alternatively I could just go to the one shop in our town which sells the range (where she probably got it anyway) and say we don't have the receipt but ask to exchange it... but ds would undoubtably tell the friend when he goes back to school so that might be worse than being upfront about it.

Could you regift the toy and buy your DS something to replace it? That's what we usually do.

I would phone the mum and ask her. It's not as if you don't like it - you liked it so much you'd already bought if for him yourself!

why not just use the receipt for the one you bought?

If you swap it won't he tell anyway ? Yes rude to text and the store are not obliged to swap it even if you knew it definitely came from there.

Think I would go to the shop where I had bought the item, use my receipt (or explain hadn't got it), and swap the item for something else in the range - but depending on age of DC and if you really didn't think he would keep quiet - as he could legitimately just say thanks for a great present, I love it - I would also probably tell the mum how well she had chosen the present and that you'd swapped it due to it being a duplicate.

What cantspel said. I wouldn't dream of asking this of someone I didn't know well.

Regift.

I thought about that cantspel but the one we bought was from amazon and this one has clearly had a price label on which has been ripped off and slightly damaged the box. We've never had anything from amazon with a price label on so I think it would look really obvious that it wasn't the same one!

Could you leave it at the grandparents house to play with there?

If it wasn't part of a range, I would just re-gift it. However, as you will be looking to swap it for something in the same range, I'd explain the situation and ask where she got it from.

Or - do you still have the box from Amazon - could you swap the boxes and send one back to Amazon?

Hmm, I hadn't thought of the regifting option, maybe we should do that and just buy him an alternative.

Not really littlewhitebag, the gps live in a different country and we only visit every other year or so, so it wouldn't get much use!

Box from amazon was ripped to shreds by a small excited boy attacking his presents.

Just Google it you weirdo.

If it's a great thing that your DS loves I would definitely re-gift it to someone who will appreciate it, and buy your DS something else in the same range to be the item that is "actually" the gift from the friend.

Please, please regift this OP. After 4 decades of buying my family what I've thought were great gifts they've either got one already or it's a very pale colour( that was an Osprey purse for sister), or the Xmas cake I've made to gift and "fed" brandy for months with Waitrose's best is too rich so they gave it away! Isn't richness the point of Xmas cake? I've given up and now buy impersonal things for them from Marks with gift receipt enclosed including awful trial size bathroom bags of their awful Magnolia fragrance toiletries and twee calendars. They seem quite happy with this since I just threw in the towel.

Perhaps you can use equivalent amount of cash to buy something as a surprise on the long haul of dark evenings between half term n Xmas which your DS would love.

If she was a good friend of yours and wouldn't take offence then yes. Otherwise no.

Definitely re-gift. I wouldn't have the receipt!

megsmouse I have had exactly the same moment and we both went bright red but didn't say anything. Terribly terribly British, I agree! (I can't say it was 'English' cos I'm Welsh ).

I wouldn't ask, I used to buy presents when I saw them in the sale and kept them for children's birthdays, so if you'd asked me for the receipt there is every chance I would have had it for months before you got the present and would have no clue where the receipt was. I was geld to move onto putting money in card much less stress.

I wouldn't ask. Regift it (obviously to someone the friend doesn't know!) or sell it on eBay and buy an alternative.

Google the name of it and you will find which shops sell it. Or save it as a gift for someone else.

I think it would be rude to ask where it came from so that you can exchange it. For all you know, they were re gifting the thing too, and if you ask you will just create an awkward situation.