Baby talk...doing my head in!!

[DescribeTheRuckus]

I have a 5 (6 next month) yo DD who is really lovely and chatty; she's always been a good speaker, so it is inexplicable to me that when summer holidays roll around, and when we go to the USA to visit my side of the family, she adopts a grating, lispy, mispronouncing words (that she normally speaks clearly) type baby voice, which drives me absolutely mad.

I have tried ignoring her when she talks this way, talking gently to try and find out why on earth she does it, etc...I just do NOT for the life of me understand. It's not only aggravating because I don't understand it, but it's simply NOT HER VOICE...she didn't talk like this when she WAS a baby, she doesn't do it at school...she doesn't do it AT ALL when the school term is on ffs...so why during every bleeding holiday??

I kind of thought she was doing it in the US because she maybe feels a bit insecure in America, but she's been going once a year since she was born, and she loves my parents/extended family as much as she loves her British family. She is perfectly comfortable around my family, knows them well, loves her cousins to bits, and still...this voice. And, because she is doing it at home in the summer hols, it can't be a wobble about being abroad.

Anything anyone could suggest?? She is so lovely, and it's not nice feeling annoyed with her...this is the time of year that we should be having fun and enjoying each other!

Is it just me?? Am I being unreasonable to want her to just talk normally, or are my expectations too high??

I think it's insecurity and shyness to be honest.

Annoying, but I wouldn't make a big thing of it.

It's best ignored.

Worra...if she did it all the time, and was a shy type, then I would agree. But this is ONLY in the school hols, and mainly when she's just with family, not with the wider world. That's why it's tough to understand...

Kids do it at all stages IME.

My eldest (nearly 15) talks in a 'new voice' these days. Its VERY loud and bellow-y.

My niece (same age) has apparently started talking without really moving her lips. Like she is too cool to even bother. Its winding my sister up a treat! Don't worry. I get that it is annoying though. Like she has regressed!

maybe she just wants to be different in the hols and with family.

look at it this way, are you the same person at work as home? maybe it's her way of relaxing and regressing.

chill, she won't be talking like this for ever.

The only thing I can suggest is that you refuse to interact with her at all until she stops. And tell others to do the same. Tell her what you are doing, then she has a choice. I'm sure she'll soon learn which side her bread is buttered on when she's gone without a few things/treats!!

Does she ever 'slip' into her normal voice? Every time she does make sure to comment in a positive voice and gentle praise. I don't know how you've been responding until now, maybe you do this already, but kids like attention from their parents, especially positive attention and hopefully she will do what she can to get more of it from you and dh : ie talking in get normal voice.

What do you think?

Maybe she is absorbing the fact that your US family speak differently to people at home, and she is experimenting with this concept. Perhaps this is just her playing with her voice and trying to speak differently as she is observing those around her do....

Maybe she wants to be babied. Tired from school, having to be a " big girl" takes it toll ! Have a chat with her about although you loved her when she was really small but now she is older how you love the fact that you can have grown up girlie chats & do things together.

I think it's just 'I'm somewhere different, so I'm going to be someone new'. I can see why it's annoying you though!

My little brother (16) does this annoying mumbling which you can only just about make out.

It. Drives. Me. Mad! And makes me want to scream JUST SPEAK PROPERLY!!

Just ignore.

Thank you all. Those of you who told me to chill out are probably right...I'm getting myself all worked up about it!

I did have another talk with her this morning about how lovely it is to have our 'girly' chats, and how I miss hearing her usual 'girly' chat voice, and how lovely it would be for us all, including Nana and Papa, to hear that as well. She's gone with her Auntie for the day (and I guarantee will speak in regular voice), but we'll see what happens when she's back.

It is me, isn't it? I need to chill out...

Funny thing is...she often teases me about my American accent, and tries to imitate that...I would much prefer her mangling my accent in imitation to this baby voice!

Could you do it back? If she teases you about your accent then maybe you could tease her about her new "accent"? She might get so annoyed by you doing it that she stops.

Does your American family 'baby' her? Or are there younger cousins around? Perhaps she's trying to damp down her UK accent to fit in, but doesn't really know how, so a baby voice is what comes out? Or maybe you are more tied up with other people than normal (understandably) so she's looking for more attention from you? Is her father with you (sorry I don't know your situ but you don't mention him in your last post) - maybe she's missing him? Maybe she's homesick?

Either way, ignore, ignore, ignore, praise the positive, if others are encouraging it then ask them to stop, and make sure you continue to have your girly chats.

I would just say to her in a clear calm way- I don't understand what you're saying to me when you talk like that, talk normally please. When she does then make a fuss about isn't it easier and nicer when you can understand each other! If she doesn't, then say 'I still can't understand you' and then wait for her to talk to you as usual.

Don't make a fuss of it or worry about it but present her with the facts, she'll soon come around.

Sorry...to clarify confusion...we live in the UK, leaving for the US tomorrow morning for three weeks holiday. Baby talk started when school let out in July; it tends to happen during any school holiday when she is home with me more, but she doesn't do it when she's with the childminder, or when we've been out with friends. Her dad is British, and neither of us has ever talked to her in a baby voice, and neither does either side of the family...even though she is the youngest on both sides. Her older brother (aged 7) used to do this, but only when he was with new people...never with family, and I could understand that...a bit of a change because he's feeling insecure.

I am overexplaining this all...it's just a phase, and some of it, actually when I look at what I just typed, is probably just a way to get my attention...she spends more time with me during school holidays, and tends to get a little more clingy, anyway...perhaps it's just her way of trying to stay close to me when we're not at work/school, etc. Plus...even if it's negative...at least she's got my attention when I'm saying to her 50 times a day to speak in her big girl voice, please!

Yup, exactly that. Make sure you ignore the irritating voice and just give lots of attention and praise for the big girl voice. It can make you feel like a twerp but it works pretty much straight away for any unwanted behaviour.