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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To be feeling a bit lost at the thought of sending last dc off to school?

4 replies

fourandahalfkids · 11/08/2013 19:38

I have 4 dc's, the oldest is starting secondary school in September, the youngest is starting primary. I was 21 when I had dc 1 and have spent the last 11 years as a SAHM. This was totally my choice and I dont regret that at all..
I have spent the years volunteering in different ways but mainly running a toddler group and helping out at the school while dc 4 has been in nursery and I have enjoyed this immensly.

However- over the summer holidays a sense of redundancy, lack of achievement, unemployability (is that even a word?) Has crept in and I am beginning to feel a little bit miserable.

Dh has gone from being in the forces (and gaining qualifications), to becoming a youth worker and gaining more qualifications. He is one of those people who could turn his hand to anything and could get a job anywhere. He also has hobbies and interests (too many really he just doesn't have time for them).
I on the other hand have nothing- i've spent the last 11 years devoted to my kids, have really had no hobbies in this time other than my volunteering and i've lost any skills/confidence I ever gained from my education.
I feel totally unemployable - and even if that were not the case dh's job means he works some mornings, some afternoons and some evenings. So all over the shop really. I could never fit in a job around that.
I am starting to feel a bit resentful of dh and all the opportunities he has had, and I know that's not right.

I just dont know what to do with my life at the moment - I am starting a job as a lunchtime supervisor at the school in September (1hour a day). I would love to be a T.A there as I love volunteering with the children.

I just feel a bit redundant and empty really. Do I need to pull myself together? Is it natural to feel like this when the last dc goes to school or am I just being whiney!
I was actually crying over this earlier and I know there are far more pressing things I could be worried about.

Someone come and tell me i'm not the only one going through this please.

OP posts:
BeaWheesht · 11/08/2013 19:41

I feel kind of the same. I'm 32 and have been a Sahm for 7 years, my youngest isn't quite 3 yet but starts nursery in January and I feel a bit lost and like I don't know how I will ever get back into the world of work.

I'm trying to find funding for a part time course at the moment. -could you do that?

fourandahalfkids · 11/08/2013 19:48

I'm looking into getting my maths up to scratch, so hopefully will find a course for that. But tbh, other than become a T.A I dont know what else I would do. So maybe a course to help with that. It's just finding the funds, dh's job isn't amazingly paid, but too much to qualify for free or subsidised courses. Glad i'm not on my own tho, thank you.

OP posts:
thegreylady · 11/08/2013 21:06

The TA idea is an excellent one-there are lots of courses and I believe there are some where you train 'on the job' and get paid.

bearleftmonkeyright · 11/08/2013 21:49

Op I am you a year ago. I am a MDS now, starting level 3 ta course in September. I have learnt to swim, got fit on my bike, volunteered at school and generally getting my life focused. It has taken me this year to get used to my youngest of three starting school. You won't look back because there is so much to look forward to. But it does take some adjusting.

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