To find it totally inappropriate for a woman to be discussing my underwear with my DS?

[youarewinning]

Popped into town to run a few errands. Had a £5 gift card from M&S so thought I'd look at getting some new shorts knickers.

Get to till and hand them over (4 pairs for £5 offer). Lady at till jokingly says to DS (8). "Are these for you?" DS didn't really answer her but mumbled "obviously not!" She then said "aren't they lovely did you help to choose the colours?" DS said "no".

I then started to talk to DS about something else to change the subject, I am usually quite a live and let live type person, but this struck me as totally inappropriate.

I mean what 8yo boy wants to discuss their mums choice of knickers?

Did you say anything at the time?
Or did you do the full English of being a bit and scuttling off silently?

You should have said "no they're for my husband"

I think she was just trying to be friendly and hadn't really thought it through.

eyes Yes, English thing I'm afraid.

piano

Jan That's what I thought, I think that's why it was after I walked away it dawned on me how inappropriate it was (IMO!)

I also think she was just trying to be friendly but got it wrong.

Some people are just really awkward (me!) and often end up saying something slightly inappropriate.

Inappropriate seems a bit hysterical. They were only pants.

I'm sure many eight year old boys would have found the question THE funniest thing they'd ever heard in their lives.

It's a bit odd, but hardly inappropriate. It sounds like it was supposed to be a joke and she expected your son to giggle about, and when he didn't she tried to mitigate the awkwardness by taking a different tack. When I saw your thread title, I assumed it was going to be someone saying 'Oh look - I can see your mummy's thong' or similar, but this sounds like it was just an attempt at friendly banter that didn't find its mark.

Some people are just really awkward (me!) and often end up saying something slightly inappropriate

This. A bit odd, but harmlessly so. Trying to be friendly, missing the mark and she probably wondered why that had seemed a sensible tack to take herself as you left I've done enough shop work to have been there myself

It sounds like a harmless joke to me, if someone asked my 7 and 5 year old that they would find it hysterical!

I work in retail and feel you can't win, you try and be friendly and people don't like it, you don't say enough and you are rude! :o

I think it's quite funny ds age 5 would have thought this was hilarious.

She probably realised you didn't see the funny side and tried to come back from it. Probably cringing after you left.

so she was trying to make a joke, surely it was light hearted as jokes go?

Your ds didn't find the joke funny

I think possibly your ds and the woman sales assistant have different styles of jokes

really not a big thing to worry about

She sounds a bit dim to me OP. Imagine a MALE cashier saying that to a little girl as her Dad bought new pants!

They're only pants though
Quite funny really

I wouldn't have minded at all. So wouldn't occur to me I suppose to not say something like that to someone else.

It was a bit strange but maybe she thought it was funny. Do they get forced to do the chit chat bit at the tills in M&S? She could have been struggling for something to say and grasped at the only thing she could think of?

This would have made my Ds's day. He often puts my bras on his head and pretends they are Thors helmet

She was probably trying to make a joke that fell flat on its face, possibly because your son is 8. He might have giggled if he was younger. Inappropriate is a bit OTT.

Thanks for the replies. I had wondered if my DS' reaction had contributed to me not finding it funny. He is under Camhs for suspected ASD so I guess as he's so literal he didn't find it funny.

I'll be more liberal in my thinking in future

THey make you make small talk at the tills sounds like it was all she was doing. The toys my dp puts them on his head and pretends his flying a spitfire....

I agee in thinking she was making small talk. On reading these replies I have had a rethink and actually do think the question about them being his was quite funny and DS serious reply just threw her.

IABU!