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AIBU?

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Original poster

To not have the TV on cbeebies all the time

50 replies

Ilovemyself · 10/08/2013 11:04

Our children are twins of 17m and a singleton of 5 months.

When the twins were younger we used to have the TV on cbeebies all day. They had their favourites and also some they didn't watch so much, but on the whole they were always watching the TV, no matter what they were doing. They also got upset if the TV Watson any other channel.

A couple of months ago we decided we wanted to we wean them off the TV, and now the TV is hardly ever on cbeebies. Tbh they take very little notice of the TV now. It is on a lot of the time, just not on things that interest them.

I know a lot of children their age are raving about waybuloos or baby jake or night garden, and I have started to think are we doing the right thing? I don't want them back to needing the TV, but wonder if we are being unfair by not letting them watch it.

OP posts:
noblegiraffe · 10/08/2013 11:08

I don't understand why you have the TV on all the time, CBeebies or otherwise.

Original poster
Ilovemyself · 10/08/2013 11:11

Because there are a lot of programs we like to watch, or have music on in the background . But that isn't the question Confused

OP posts:
Fakebook · 10/08/2013 11:20

My dd never watched TV as a toddler. She was in full time nursery and we never had time to put the TV on. She got through toddler age without knowing what In The Night garden was (thank goodness!) and without knowing what Waybuloo was. She's 5 now and it doesn't seem like she's missed out or has been affected by it!

My DS is 19m and at home all the time and only watches Mr Tumble and Numberjacks. He doesn't rave on about them though, and we have the tv on most of the time we're at home too.

Do what you feel is best.

ToysRLuv · 10/08/2013 11:22

Are 17 month olds raving about stuff?

SPsTotallyMullerFuckingLicious · 10/08/2013 11:23

Do what you want

Figgygal · 10/08/2013 11:23

YANBU just keep it off I've had to do that to wean DS Off peppa pig as he screams whenever it's not on and snorted at us to have it put on Shock

SmiteYouWithThunderbolts · 10/08/2013 11:24

I don't want them back to needing the TV, but wonder if we are being unfair by not letting them watch it.

You're not being unfair at all, don't worry. We fell into the trap of having the tv on a lot, but I put my foot down a while ago and now they only have a little bit of tv a day. They're fine! They play in the garden or run around chasing each other. Ds1 especially has gotten much more into reading and is a proper book worm now.

I much prefer the peace and quiet of not having the tv on in the background constantly. I find the constant murmur of it really annoying now.

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 10/08/2013 11:25

YANBU. I refuse to have Cbeebies on all the time. I got sick of toys sitting unplayed with when the TV was on. So I switched over the TV to whatever I wanted to watch and DC wandered off and made their own fun.
TV isn't banned, and I do put child friendly shows on now and again, usually as I am sorting tea out.
I think it has done my kids a world of good. Their imaginative play has improved so much.
After a chat with my brother last night I realised how little TV we actually watched when we were younger, yet we had a fantastic childhood. We played out all day when it was sunny, and when it rained we wrote story books together, built dens in his room, learned tricks with yoyo's etc.
I think minimal TV for children does them good.

noblegiraffe · 10/08/2013 11:29

"Young children may not be paying close attention to a televised program that they cannot understand, but their parents are watching. It might be back- ground media to the child, but it is foreground media to the parent. It distracts the parent and decreases parent-child interaction.30,31 Infant vo cabulary growth is directly related to the amount of ?talk time? or the amount of time parents spend speak- ing to them.32 Heavy television use in a household can interfere with a child?s language development simply because parents likely spend less time talking to the child.33
Even if the program is not intended for the child to watch, research has found that children play and interact less with adults when a television is on, perhaps because the adult?s attention is focused on the television program. A study that examined 12-, 24-, and 36- month-olds found that background television not only reduced the length of time that a child played but also that it reduced the child?s focused attention during play.34 Children stop to look at a televised program, halt their ongoing play, and move on to a different activity after the interruption.34 Although most research has been performed on ado- lescents, study results suggest that background media might interfere with cognitive processing, memory, and reading comprehension.4,34?36 Only 1 research study, conducted in 1996, resulted in evidence to the contrary. In that study, 10-month-old infants tuned out surrounding noise and concen- trated more during play.37
Background television has the direct effect of distracting a child and the in- direct effect of taking a parent?s atten- tion away from the child. In addition, parents? media diet influences the media habits of their children.3"

pediatrics.aappublications.org/content/early/2011/10/12/peds.2011-1753.full.pdf

TwasBrillig · 10/08/2013 11:29

Smite and figgy -she's not leaving it off. She's leaving it on - just on what she wants to watch not kids programmes

personally I tend not to have adult tv on around the children as they pick up so much, especally as they get older. I also don't want too much screen time (I suspect we have a lot more than many mn though). In our case the only tv they watch is cbeebies and it will stay that way for a long time. I like that there is no adverts and that its age appropriate. Ideally though its off.

I've never really felt comfortable sitting watching 'my' tv in the daytime when the children are playing, but that's me. I wouldn't say you're being unreasonable at all, just making different choices.

DameDeepRedBetty · 10/08/2013 11:29

I found that dtd1 in particular would watch anything that flickered. I took to tuning into a radio channel, so that there was music and voices around to soothe dp, who freaks out if there isn't some background sound.

forevergreek · 10/08/2013 11:40

We don't have it on at all in day. I find tv very distracting and wouldn't want it one whilst trying to read to them/ them trying to concentrate. Tv here is late eve occasionally or when someone is ill
As far as adult tv, I don't think many things we would watch would be suitable for young children ie game of thrones, 15 rated films, etc etc... But I suppose it depends what you watch.
In answer to question, of course you don't have to have tv on children's channels

manchestermummy · 10/08/2013 11:44

TV is off more than on in our house. It isn't banned but I don't see the point of having it on for background. Personally, I would not have it on something I watch with the DC around. When they do watch TV, it tends to be stuff that has been recorded so that there is a finite end. Or a DVD.

Call me odd/anal if you like but both my DC have excellent language skills and I am convinced part of that is to do with our approach to TV. We also put on radio too and a whole variety of CDs. Love Spotify too.

ToysRLuv · 10/08/2013 11:52

I wouldn't have adult programs on while DC are around, either. DS is nearly 4 now, so does really pay attention. To be fair, at 17 months he didn't care about the TV at all (much less rave about anything), so I can't really relate to your situation.

In any case, we only watch CBeebies or DVDs. Some days quite a lot, some days barely any. Whatever gets us through the day! Plus, DS has learned a lot from shows like the Octonauts, so it's not just "light entertainment".

Do what feel right and gets you all smoothly through the day. I would, however, reassess whether you want to have adult programmes on while DC are up. After all, if you record them, you can give them your full attention after bedtime. At the same time, you'll be able to give DC more attention while they're awake.

MrsMook · 10/08/2013 12:05

I tend to listen to radio in the day.

C Beebies started being used in small amounts when DS1 was 1 as it was mid-winter and something to do in the long evenings and allowed me to get on with things like preparing dinner. The amount went up when I was pg over the long winter and struggled to leave the house with him because of SPD. By the time I'd recovered from the birth and felt ready to rejoin the real world, DS was hard to pull away from the TV as he watched everything and was reluctant to leave it to go for breakfast, get dressed etc. We ended up with a small range of DVDs on loop with DS drifting in and out and coming in and protesting everytime it was turned off.

I put a timer on the TV so it clicks off at 10am. We had tantrums for a few days but he quickly accepted it. It now doesn't turn on until he's in bed. It's so much better a month in. He's not looking for it to be on constantly and it's more of a treat with boundaries. Because it's switched off at the mains, it won't turn on every time the remote is touched, and doesn't matter that he can use the DVD player himself.

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 10/08/2013 12:12

Just because the TV is on it does not mean I don't interact with my children. I still play trains with them, read to them (though I do pause the TV when doing that), do jigsaws etc.
I like the TV on as background noise. I don't have unsuitable things on the TV, usually it is comedy shows that are on during the day, that don't deal with adult themes. If anything has a hint of being unsuitable I put something else on.
My children also like to go and play in DD's room for an hour or so a day as she has lots of books in her room. DD likes to read to DS and he tells her what the pictures show.
Plus this only refers to the days we are in the house all day, which I try to avoid as much as I can.
My children have excellent communication skills (according to school and pre school) and are very social children.
At the moment our system works for all of us. If at any point it no longer suits us I will reassess the TV situation.

ToysRLuv · 10/08/2013 12:17

Right. Good for you.

LittleprincessinGOLDrocks · 10/08/2013 12:21

Yes it is thanks.

mameulah · 10/08/2013 12:24

cbeebies radio is really good too!

I use it at school, even with 7 year olds. They really enjoy it, or they say they do!

jessieagain · 10/08/2013 12:28

I think that it is good that they don't watch tv!

Research has shown it is not the best for them as it is too passive and stops them from playing, which is how they learn.

I try and turn it off as much as I can and when there is nothing I am really interested in watching i turn it off. Before ds it was always on so this a big change for us.

I only use it as a babysitter if I need ds occupied but he only really likes a few programs so I play DVDs for him instead of just putting on the tv.

He is 2 btw and although he likes some program's I think if we got rid of the tv altogether he wouldn't really miss it anyway. I just see it a convenience for me.

enderwoman · 10/08/2013 12:38

Depends what you mean by adult TV. Neighbours, Question Time or Top Gear is harmless but I wouldn't watch the news or Die Hard.

Pobblewhohasnotoes · 10/08/2013 12:40

I tend to put it on in the afternoons about 4pm when I'm starting to flag. Although by that time there's shite such as Grandpa in my pocket on.

I sometimes put it on when I'm in the kitchen to distract DS as he hates me being in there and tries to push me out. Otherwise it's off. Sometimes he turns if off himself! His language is great at 18 months so I'm not worried that I'm hindering his development.

I can understand wanting background noise on, I'll stick the radio on and we have a dance.

pianodoodle · 10/08/2013 12:56

I had cbeebies on a lot at one stage but DD only really paid attention to specific programmes. I think if you actually watched it all day your brain would leak out your ear Grin

I like background noise too when I'm at home alone (with DD) so we've changed to absolute 80's radio. Now DD can be stuck in a musical time warp with me!

I did feel a bit bad as someone gave me the Godfather DVD (my favourite!) for my birthday and I put it on for a bit one day when DD fell asleep in her highchair at lunch.

I was getting into it when just after the cafe shooting scene DD exclaimed "they're asleep haha!" pointing at the bloody bodies slumped over the table... not sure how long she'd been awake for but she seemed to be enjoying it Blush

manchestermummy · 10/08/2013 13:14

There's Cbeebies radio?

beepoff · 10/08/2013 13:45

Isn't radio as "bad" as TV in terms of background noise, passivity and distraction?