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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

to be pissed off about this.

21 replies

oldham70 · 09/08/2013 00:59

According to mil dd1 is tall like her daddy. Be is 5 ft 10 fgs and she is the 2nd shortest in her year. I accept I am short butmy brother and father are both over 6ft.
Now according to dh dd2's red hair comes from her great uncle. Err what about her maternal uncle and grandfather.
Sometimes I think I must have imagined my 3 csections..
Aibu

OP posts:

PoppadomPreach · 09/08/2013 01:04

For your child to have red hair, BOTH parents must carry the red gene.

Tell him to stick that in his pipe etc etc

YANBU, it would annoy me too!

IneedAsockamnesty · 09/08/2013 01:26

It is a bit annoying.

But try and remember that his family have the benefit of his family history with regard to looks and traits and are not as aware of the same things about your family,so its only to be expected that they will consider dd in that context

Original poster

oldham70 · 09/08/2013 01:33

Ironically she never claims any family resemblance with ds. That is of course because he has a few issues. Plus she has always favoured dd.

OP posts:

mynameisslimshady · 09/08/2013 01:53

Just laugh, honestly its not worth it,

My MIL announced my son couldn't be my husbands because he didn't have some imaginary family trait. Then went on to claim everything he did as theirs, when his eyes started going brown, like mine, she actually said 'oh his eyes are turning brown, I wonder where he got that from, must be a genetic throwback' (they all have blue eyes) and sat in front of me (telling her repeatedly I have brown eyes) and phoned about 10 family members until she found one with brown eyes (an auntie linked by marriage) and then audibly breathed a sigh of relief. because she tracked one down.

Weird woman hated me for stealing her son. It was pretty amusing watching her try to remove me from my husband and childs life though.

shellbot · 09/08/2013 08:35

I had a MIL like that. I think she honestly believed my son was a clone of ex-h. I don't see her anymore but wonder how she keeps that belief now when both my sons have my eye colour (blue) and hair colour (sort of blond/golden/light brown) when ex-h is just dark brown (in between the grey ).

shellbot · 09/08/2013 08:37

mynameisslimshady - I too was a son stealer. With hindsite I wish she fought harder for him and kept him!

shellbot · 09/08/2013 08:37

hindsight duh

SofaKing · 09/08/2013 08:50

Dd and ds2 have red hair, just like dh' s dad. Also just like my dad which they always ignore!

I think they are desperate to find a resemblance as dh looks nothing like fil at all, literally polar opposites physically and mentally.

YouTheCat · 09/08/2013 09:04

My ex thought he was cock of the North when I found out I was having twins. All his friends congratulated him on his virility and his mother puzzling at how we could possibly be having twins as there are none at all on his side.

I did point out that our non-identical twins happened because I am predisposed to release 2 eggs, genetically. I have twin brothers. My mother's maternal aunt had twins. There's a lot of twins running through that side of the family.

But oh no it was all because exh was such a fine specimen of manhood.

foslady · 09/08/2013 10:34

I told my ex MIL I thought my dd ought to have a DNA test to find out who her mother was seeing as everything she deemed as positive came from her fsthers side.......but only from her part of the family as she is still mad with her xh, my dd granddad.......

Thecurlywurlymum · 09/08/2013 19:04

I too am a son stealer. And as for my ds. Anyone would think she gave birth to him as well. Made me feel like a brood mare for years. Don't get me started on the rest of his bloody family. Anyone know of a good hit man?

howisthisnotagoodplan · 09/08/2013 20:50

yanbu at all! my mil does this all the time. all my ds traits/looks/habits come from her side of the family - no matter how remote or dead that person is they have had an influence in shaping my ds! combined with her constantly buying 'I love my daddy' tshirts. when ds was first born I asked dh why she didn't just come in and pee round the Moses basket to properly stake her territory!?!

urtwistingmymelonman · 10/08/2013 06:15

when my son was born a woman(who knew my oh better than she knew me) kept saying' omg! he looks sooooo much like his dad doesn't he? did you actually do any work at all???'
(what?apart from carrying him for nine months,labouring for ten hours and then sqeezing him out of my vagina you daft old trout?).
the fact was that if you compared mine and my sons photos at roughly the same age you would have been hard done by to distinguish who was who we were that alike!

Justforlaughs · 10/08/2013 06:18

At least YOUR DH is your DCs father! I kept getting "isn't he like his dad" when they weren't biologically related (and completely and utterly different in every way possible! eye colour, hair colour, straight hair/ curly hair, face shape, height and personality extremes - placid and laid back v's totally hyper and over excited about everything)

MammaTJ · 10/08/2013 06:20

Acoording to one spiteful 'friend' rumour, my ginger haired DD is a friends because she has red hair like him.

Nothing to do with me and my ginger hair then, or DPs ginger bits in his beard when he grows one. Oh no, couldn't be!!

urtwistingmymelonman · 10/08/2013 06:24

that sounded like I implied my son was born a woman didn't it???

birdmomma · 10/08/2013 06:33

DD1 is the spitting image of me, every one who ever meets us tells us this. It is like looking in the mirror of eternal youth when I look at her. My MIL thinks she looks just like her Dad of course.

urtwistingmymelonman · 10/08/2013 06:37

same here birdmomma.

MyNameIsLola · 10/08/2013 07:18

I have the opposite with my aunt. My children are the absolute spit of DH apparently, none of their traits resemble me or my family. Looks-wise, I agree with her on the eldest two but the younger two are unmistakably my children, they look exactly like me in every way.

Meanwhile, her DGCs take after our family, obviously. Even though her DGD is olive skinned, brunette, dark eyed and tall while we are all fair haired/skinned, short etc.

It's so bloody odd. And why does it even matter??

BinksToEnlightenment · 10/08/2013 07:26

It's my mum who does this and it drives me batshit. It even gets to the point where she calls her dad my son's (only) grandad and completely excludes his actual only grandad.

It's like I've been reborn!

FeetUpUntilChristmas · 10/08/2013 08:29

I hate all the comparing of new babies with relatives -"oh doesn't she look the splitting image of great uncle barney" etc

My IL do this all he time, and to be fair when my DDs were small the did look very much like my DH, mainly because they were blond and blue eyed like him, however so is my DM and her family. But to be truthful I wasn't going to spend time looking back through old photos for family resemblance, however often it was brought up.

Now they are teenagers if they are out with DH it's still quite obvious that they are his DDs, but now the older one actually looks more like me, whereas the younger one has the same build I had at her age, and the bone structure of FILs side if the family.

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