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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Rude FB friend?

14 replies

ReturnofSaturn · 06/08/2013 15:50

Contacted a friend on FB at the weekend after not having spoken to him in quite a long time!
Anyway am I being incredibly unreasonable to be pissed off with it being ignored, yet him then being active on FB since! No read receipt on it so I can only hazard a guess he deleted it straightaway or something.

Argh some people are just so ignorant, I'd rather I was just deleted off their friends list if people don't want me to contact them!

OP posts:
FrussoHathor · 06/08/2013 15:52

Yabu. He may not even be aware he has a message. Give it at least 2 weeks.

babiesinslingseathair · 06/08/2013 15:54

YABU & a bit childish.

I've done this. It tales some emotional investment to write a meaningful response. It goes on a to do list. Especially if its someone who's just not that important in my life,

On the other hand it takes no time/effort to like, share or comment briefly on crap.

That's Facebook.

Also, maybe he's just not in the mood. It's the same as mobile phones, texting etc, they are tools for my convenience, not others'.

ConfusedPixie · 06/08/2013 15:55

You could have gone straight to his 'other' inbox, in which case he may not even know he has a message.

FirstStopCafe · 06/08/2013 15:57

Yabu. I use fb on my phone so can pop on for two mins to do really quick things. If there is a message I want to reply to properly I will wait until I have more time. This may be what he's doing. Give him more time

DameDeepRedBetty · 06/08/2013 15:58

Don't know about anyone else but I don't know I've got FB messages until they turn up in my email inbox. If I do a quick update on the phone, I certainly won't see the inbox.

MadeOfStarDust · 06/08/2013 16:00

I don't use FB on the phone - just on my laptop at home - could take a week for me to look at it.. (2 weeks if we are off on holiday)

jacks365 · 06/08/2013 16:01

All messages on fb are emailed to me so I have read them even if it shows on fb that I haven't. I also post pictures on fb from my phone without actually going onto the site so sometimes it will look like I've been on fb and ignored a message when it's simply not true. Give him more time.

wigglesrock · 06/08/2013 16:01

YABU and a bit stalkery. You contacted him at the weekend, it's only Tuesday afternoon Hmm

ReturnofSaturn · 06/08/2013 16:10

Wow didn't think I was being unreasonable or stalkery, just a bit unusual for me, people always respond straightaway usually. There is more to this as to why i''m annoyed/disappointed but I don't want to be accused of drip feeding! So i'll just take the YABU's Smile

OP posts:
MrMacadoo · 06/08/2013 16:17

drip feeding has to be less annoying than saying

"There is more to this as to why i''m annoyed/disappointed but I don't want to be accused of drip feeding! So i'll just take the YABU's"

and then not providing any further info! It's like telling someone that you have a secret but you can't tell them what it is! So for that, YABU

CSIJanner · 06/08/2013 16:24

YAB-slightly-U

My friends thought the same but in reality I didn't even know that I had messages in my FB inbox. I couldn't read them until they said and I logged on using my laptop instead of the phone. I never got a text/email telling me I had one as my settings had all been reset by FB itself.

meganorks · 06/08/2013 17:18

I sometimes see messages straight away (ie as the person has just sent) and think 'oh I don't want to reply straight away, I will look like a right keeno'. Then I promptly forget! Or doing something else and think reply later but again forget. Do the same with texts too sometimes. Certainly doesn't mean I don't like the senders!

LazyFaire · 06/08/2013 17:23

If you haven't been in contact on facebook for a while, it has probably gone to his 'other' message box with all the spam, which you don't get notifications for.

Leave it a week and then if you are dying to speak to him, post a wall message saying 'Hey did you see my PM? Just fancied catching up!' and if he ignores that well at least you know where you stand!

Unexpected · 06/08/2013 17:24

If he uses his phone to FB, he probably hasn't even seen your message. The presentation I get on my phone is very different to on my iPad. I sent a stuffing recipe to a friend in Dec which she never acknowledged but she posted on FB the other day that she had logged on for the first time in months from a PC and found about 12 messages which she had no knowledge of until then.

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