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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To start dd at 2 pre schools for settling in and choose whichever one she gets on the best at

24 replies

plim · 05/08/2013 21:30

Sounds ridiculous I know but we are spoilt for choice with four good pre school / nursery settings nearby. I put dd3 on the waiting list for all of them two years ago. She will be 2 in oct and I'm going back to work.

I've dismissed the outstanding private nursery that everyone raves about (we've been on the waiting list for two years!) as I found the owner almost too business like - too many rules, no flexibility and the staff looked like they'd just come out of school themselves.

The second is the closest to our home - a good ofsted and even does an after school pick up for dd1 and dd2 so totally convenient - but I hated it! The manager was really detached from the business, the outdoor space was on a farm and it didn't feel safe and they hada high turn over of staff.

So we've gone for the pre schools. Both equidistance to our house, 1 is outstanding ofsted, a portacabin set in the grounds of a local village school (our school doesn't have a pre school), it has a small but well equipped play area, its clean and looks very well run and has an excellent reputation but the manager who has been there for 14 years is leaving and the deputy is taking over in September. We haven't met her.

2nd is run by three women one is a former primary teacher, she is a foster carer and has been running the preschool for 23 years! She is retiring in 3 years time and she is really lovely, gave me her home phone number and said call anytime etc. it's another portacabin but its a bit tired, they have tons of books and stuff but it looks a bit shabby not dirty but 'tired'. The outdoor space is amazing - veg gardens and outdoor classroom under cover etc. it's also where a lot of dd3 cohort will go.

Problem is we found out that 2 only has 3 children on rota for September as all the current class start school in sept. it's good in some ways as dd3 will have a lot of attention! But they've applied to take 1 year olds to get more children. They are gov funded so they say it doesn't matter what their numbers are.

So, I'm so stuck and really need a fresh perspective! My thoughts was to start dd3 at some play sessions in both as she gets unlimited play hours with me in September at both to settle and suss them out but is that unreasonable! And sorry for the unreasonably long post :)

OP posts:

Sirzy · 05/08/2013 21:33

they won't get much funding for 3 children though.

Personally I would go for pre school 1, but I would pick one and go with that rather than confusing her with 2 settings. Maybe one visit with her to each before deciding but I wouldn't stretch it out too much

mrsjay · 05/08/2013 21:36

what Sirzy said really sums up what I was going to say dont start her then take her out it will confuse her

mrsjay · 05/08/2013 21:37

oh and fwiw I started in childcare straight out of school i was very good at my job

FamiliesShareGerms · 05/08/2013 21:39

Choose one and go for it, otherwise she is unlikely to settle at either.

Original poster

plim · 05/08/2013 21:41

Shit I know I should but I don't know which one!!!

OP posts:

mrsjay · 05/08/2013 21:46

ID go with the 2nd one if it was me just but what you are saying about it, it might not be state of the art but sounds lovely

Original poster

plim · 05/08/2013 21:56

It is lovely and the woman who runs it is great but I'm worried about the 1 year olds joining and how they will cope.

OP posts:

mrsjay · 05/08/2013 21:58

I am sure it will be fine they need to have the ratio i cant remember what it is now so they cant take in too many babies

Original poster

plim · 05/08/2013 22:09

I spose it comes down to what's more important the people or the setting. If its the setting then 1 wins hands down but if its the people then its got to be 2 as we haven't met the deputy at 1.

The building at 2 is SHABBY!!!!

OP posts:

mrsjay · 05/08/2013 22:12

is it safe inside and you did say it has an outside area and an outside classroom as long as the building is safe inside and out then it doesnt matter what it looks like, the women who run out sound like they really love their nursery,

Original poster

plim · 05/08/2013 22:16

Oh yeah definitely safe! Just a bit 1980s!!! They have a piano in one corner and loads of bean bags and that's about it!

OP posts:

mrsjay · 05/08/2013 22:17

do they run play sessions before you have to accept the place ?

Original poster

plim · 05/08/2013 22:19

Yes she's booked in at both settings doing an hour a day with me and dh then two hours etc for four weeks.

OP posts:

mrsjay · 05/08/2013 22:20

oh now i dont know what to do go to the sessions before you accept get a feel for it then choose which is what you were goiing to do in the first place

BrokenSunglasses · 05/08/2013 22:23

A child won't know the difference between a tied looking portacabin an a new one, try not to focus on that. What matters significantly more is the people working there.

Number 2 sounds like a no brainer to me.

mrsjay · 05/08/2013 22:30

TBH me 2 it sounds really nice and even if it is a bit tired looking it doesnt mean anything if the building isnt up to scratch as long as the children enjoy it

Original poster

plim · 05/08/2013 22:30

Well the woman at number 2 is great and has so much experience. I liked the fact that she said we can bring dd3 siblings to a few sessions to help her settle in and things like that that made me feel that she is genuinely interested in her. I'm just concerned about th not having the numbers and it being a strain!

OP posts:

mrsjay · 05/08/2013 22:32

it wont be a strain a lot of preschools take littlies now I think it is fine it works out the woman is experienced she will work it out go to the sessions see how you feel, did you have this angst with your other dc

Original poster

plim · 05/08/2013 22:37

No! We lived down south and it was a battle to get them in anywhere so no choice really. Dd1 hated nursery and didn't settle dd2 lived his and never looked back!

OP posts:

Original poster

plim · 05/08/2013 22:37

Sorry 'loved' his

OP posts:

Saffyz · 05/08/2013 22:45

Ask to meet the deputy at number 1. They won't mind at all.

maja00 · 05/08/2013 22:50

I'd really worry about the dwindling numbers of the 2nd one. What do they mean by "government funded"? If it's just the 15 hours a week for 3 and 4 year olds then that is not going to cover staffing or building costs for 3 children. Suddenly taking on under 2s, more staff etc, trying to find enough paying children is a real gamble. I would not be surprised if they shut down soon.

Original poster

plim · 06/08/2013 08:18

I don't know how the funding works. She just said that they are funded by the school which means she's lucky as she can run it for the children and not as a business

OP posts:

maja00 · 06/08/2013 10:19

Are you in the UK? It seems very unlikely to me that the school would be funding a pre-school or daycare nursery from their own budget. Even children's centres attached to schools have to fund themselves from daycare fees. Something odd going on there.

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