Acceptable length of time to sit in a busy cafe when you've finished your drink/food?

[angelos02]

Yesterday I went with DH to local café, all seats outside were taken and there was a group of 4 people with empty cups in front of them. Fair enough I thought, they may be waiting for food. DH and I went and sat inside (we'd rather have been outside as the weather was beautiful). The group of 4 left about 20 minutes later having not ordered anymore drinks or food.

AIBU to think you should vacate your table fairly promptly if it is clear that people are looking to sit down? At least 2 other sets of people looked for seats outside, carrying trays so it wasn't just DH & I that they inconvenienced.

Or are some people just so self-centred they have no idea what is going on around them?

alright becool, no need to be rude!

Obviously, as we had an elderly person with mobility issues, we were not able to walk up the road to a less busy cafe!

Yes they had no obligation to move, but it would have been the right thing to do so, similar to giving up your seat on a bus.

rude?

becool, perhaps I misinterpreted, but I did feel that your reply did come across as a little bit sarcastic and aggressive.

feeling a little sensitive perhaps? I see a theme here ........

I did think YWBU and a bit silly by not asking the other customers and then getting cross when they don't read your mind and start revolving around you.

If it really bothered you and your GM really was in need of a more comfy seat, then for goodness sake ask. Don't sit back and tut about/judge other customers who will no doubt be completely oblivious about you.

If you have someone with impaired mobility and a group of 6 then you either book a table or go somewhere that has a table big enough.
If there was only 1 restaurant in the whole area that was convenient for you to sit at then you can't expect them to have a table available in the middle of the holidays unless you reserve it.
The sitting round chatting after a meal is part of the meal to me.
Expecting someone else to move just because you prefer the look of their table to the one that is empty seems very rude to me.
You don't have a "right" to have a table of the size you want where you want in the restaurant of your choice unless you reserve it. If you turn up somewhere on spec you take what is available or go elsewhere. All this envious glowering at other people who got their earlier than you and have tables is madness.

So there were enough seats, just not outside where you'd have preferred to sit. YABU Do you expect people to rush off as soon as they've finished their drinks or buy another drink to justify staying at the table? I think staying for 20 or 30 minutes after finishing your drinks is fine. Staying for 2 hours would be not so good if it's busy.

YABU. There were empty seats inside. You wanted their seat but they got there first.

I can't stand cafes when you feel you are on a conveyor belt. Drink, eat and get out.
The only place I know of where that happens is McDonalds.

YABU as there were still seats available. Even if there weren't, I think 20 minutes is acceptable. DP and I often sit for 2-3 hours over dinner. We order two courses each plus wine, so it's not like we're being cheap.

All this envious glowering at other people who got their earlier than you and have tables is madness.
YY!

And it's pointless. I for one would be completely unaware of your glowering - you are only pissing yourself off by having these unrealistic expectations that others are going to stop what they are doing in order to consider your possible needs/wants/ideas of "fairness"?

The whole point for me when I visit a cafe is to either people watch or meet a friend and catch up.

I but a drink and something to eat and leave when I am ready which will usually be around an hour all told

YABU to think they should have left after a set time

I think you should go somewhere else to be frank.

Check out the seating first before ordering that's precisely what myself and a friend did the other day.
We moved on until we found a place with a suntrap. Sat there for a couple of hours ordered food, drinks and then had one more drink.
We had paid enough for the drinks and food to warrent the use of the table and chairs for a good long chat imo.

I don't think the 3 men at the big table should move just because a party of 6 would like their table - even of one of the party has a disability. It's irrelevant - they were there first, they are entitled to enjoy their lunch and not consider what everybody else wants.

Yabu as there were other seats available.

However I got a bit annoyed on Sunday when I went to a cafe with my mum. There was a couple who were sat outside with empty cups when we arrived and the only seating available was one rickety barstool just inside the cafe. (you could easily see this as it was a v small cafe) I am 30 weeks pg and huge and they watched me attempt to climb onto this bloody barstool and nearly topple off (crap balance due to mahoosive bump), then sit very uncomfortably. They then remained there without ordering anything else for the whole time we were having our drinks.

If that was me, I would definitely have left to allow a pregnant woman to have a proper seat.

20 minutes? You are seriously annoyed about a group sitting at a table for 20 minutes?

YABU.
That group could have eaten before you arrived and have just finished their drinks. Groups go to cafes to socialise as well as to eat and drink, I don't see why they should jump up and leave as soon as their cup is empty. Fair enough if there had been no spare tables and the cafe owner had asked them if they mind vacating if they have finished, but there were other tables so there was no need for them to rush.
Okay I understand that you would have preferred the outside table, but it is a case of first come first served and they got there first.
If you were that keen to sit outside then to could have moved to that table when the group left.

For what it's worth I think you must be very lucky if your biggest worry is a group taking up the best table in a cafe for 20 minutes.

YABU

Did you actually look right down inside their cups and make sure there was not an inch or two of coffee inside all of the cups?

Perhaps they had had lunch/sandwiches, perhaps this was their second or third cup of coffee? Lingering over a coffee is one of the truly simple pleasures in life and unless you are going to a cafe/restaurant with "sittings" and they make it clear that they need the table back by a specific time then you have no right to complain.

And yes I am "so self-centred" that I don't always notice things around me when I am busy catching up with friends or enjoying my coffee and reading my kindle - certainly not people who already have a seat but are suffering (presumably fairly quietly) from "seat envy".

If there's spare tables, then people can stay as long as they like. If there's people walking out without ordering because of lack of tables, or people standing around with trays looking for a seat, then it's up to the owner of the place to suggest they order more or move them on.