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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

to have felt sorry for this little boy.

26 replies

Snowyelephantshavewrinkles · 05/08/2013 11:43

Was in shopping centre yesterday, two people chatting one with two children the other with one. Lady with two children had one in the buggy and one holding her hand.

This was the loud conversation I heard.
"Oh yes she (points to child in buggy )is wonderful but this one is a piece of shit. He is an evil bastard who is only a fucking nightmare can't wait until he goes to school out of my fucking way."

I glanced at the boy who just looked so sad.

Now I know life can be hard with two little ones and I should not have been listening in but that really did break my heart.

OP posts:
mrsjay · 05/08/2013 11:47

thats horrible poor kid. although people do swear and whatnot around kids that is just terrible to hear,

ShatnersBassoon · 05/08/2013 11:49

You weren't listening in. She was broadcasting her abuse for all to hear. Glancing at them isn't enough.

lovecupboards · 05/08/2013 11:49

One day society will have to address why people like this are able to carry on having kids when they clearly hate them.

Original poster
Snowyelephantshavewrinkles · 05/08/2013 11:50

I also didn't think stepping in and saying something would have helped.

OP posts:
libertine73 · 05/08/2013 11:50

that's horrible, poor kid :( even if you think..... I really can't wait for eldest to start school, I'm struggling....you NEVER let your child hear you say it. nasty cow.

mrsjay · 05/08/2013 11:52

no it wouldn't have helped one bit she wouldve probably smacked you in the face for being an interfering cow.

Wishwehadgoneabroad · 05/08/2013 11:53

:(

ourlittlestreet · 05/08/2013 12:02

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Rooners · 05/08/2013 12:02

I stepped in once, and said something when there was a mum talking like this to her little girl.

I got an earful but at least it might have made her think, actually, people think I'm a bitch if I talk to her like this (I hadn't said that - something polite but direct) and maybe, just maybe it made her think.

I don't know. It took the focus off the little girl for a minute while she slagged me off anyway.

ourlittlestreet · 05/08/2013 12:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

LazyMonkeyButler · 05/08/2013 12:07

Oh dear, how sad Sad.

Did she really think her son wouldn't hear & take it in? Terrible.

ladymariner · 05/08/2013 12:14

My brother stepped in once, he saw a bloke swipe his little boy on the backside so hard it took him off his feet!!! My brother saw red and asked the bloke what the hell he thought he was doing, the bloke told him to fuck off.....big mistake! My brother kept his cool (god knows how, 20 years ago the guy would have been picking his teeth off the floor) but icily got his message across.....the bloke backed off! As my brother said, if that's what he does in public to that little boy what does he do in private?

SillyTilly123 · 05/08/2013 12:33

When i used to work in a fruit and veg shop one of the regular customers came in and started saying things like that about her dd (she wasn't swearing really bad but did call her a bitch-which is bad enough) I felt so sorry for that little girl. Like the little boy in your story she looked so sad. I never looked at that customer in the same way again. :(

MyBaby1day · 05/08/2013 12:53

YANBU, poor little thing, what a poor excuse of a mother! Angry Sad

ImNotBloody14 · 05/08/2013 12:59

i'm so glad to see the responses to this OP. I posted a while ago about the way children were being spoken to on a ch4 'documentary' and got told by quite a few on here that it wasn't abusive because the children were raised like that and knew by the tone whether the threats were real or not and that because everyone around them all spoke like that it was ok. Hmm

OctopusPete8 · 05/08/2013 12:59

God thats awful Sad ,

not much else I can say Sad

zatyaballerina · 05/08/2013 13:09

yanbu, that's horrible. I wonder why people like this have children, it's such a pity that babies are born to these ungrateful scum when there are so many people who would love to be able to have a child to love and cherish but can't. It's such an injustice.

FrenchRuby · 05/08/2013 13:15

I wonder too why people have children if they clearly don't like children. Poor kids :(

BinarySolo · 05/08/2013 13:20

I remember working at a surestart. There was a toddler there who would always cry for his mum when left in the crèche. He was crying at the door once while she sat on the sofa next to it and said 'oh for fucks sake, just shut the fuck up you little shit.' Sad I always wondered what his home life with her was like and how he'd grow up.

Fairylea · 05/08/2013 13:21

So sad. There is just no need whatsoever for anyone to talk to their child like that (or about them to someone else). Just horrendous.

whereismytoenail · 05/08/2013 13:30

I took DS to the park a few days ago , when we were walking back for the bus home , 2 women were walking along with pushchairs and 1 older boy , he looked about 7,
i dont know what he had said or done but she shouted " ill fucking knock you out , i couldnt give a fuck where we are " i just looked at her with my mouth hanging open and hurried my DS along

Ive thought about this little boy ever since but what could i do ? risk saying something and lend up getting a punch in the face in front of my 3 year old

Its awful , no need what so ever to go on like this , like other people have said , if this is what they are like in public , what about at home :(

LEMisdisappointed · 05/08/2013 13:33

I've stepped in a couple of times in situations like this - sadly i don't think it made an ounce of difference :(

Rooners · 05/08/2013 13:40

'I remember working at a surestart. There was a toddler there who would always cry for his mum when left in the crèche. He was crying at the door once while she sat on the sofa next to it and said 'oh for fucks sake, just shut the fuck up you little shit.' sad I always wondered what his home life with her was like and how he'd grow up.'

and THIS is why we have a crime problem, and abusive people, and people who abuse their own children.

When I see people treating their babies in this way I want to go to them and say, that is a criminal in the making if you carry on treating him like shit.

Eyesunderarock · 05/08/2013 13:45

Well, let's hope he is school age in September where he will be in contact with people who will care for him, have conversations with him, play and entertain him and teach him that he is both loveable and worthy of being loved.
People who will talk to him politely and patiently and listen.
For all the shit teachers get thrown at them, for a number of children they are the first taste of being considered as human beings with rights and wants that should be met.

BinarySolo · 05/08/2013 14:45

I know Rooners. It was probably about 5 years ago now but I still think a lot about some of the stuff I saw and heard working there. The girl in question had twin sisters and they were all signed up for a teen mum programme. They must have all planned to get pregnant at the same time as the kids were just months apart. We had to report their behaviour a few times.