Oh, I don't know..........?

[gandaulf]

I am on here to admit that I am so unhappy. I want to curl up in bed and cry all the time. I don't because I have 2 wonderful children.
Everyone seems to stare at me ... They think I am as strange as I do myself. I am hopeless and a failure - why am I such a joke ?
I want to shout to someone, anyone, - Help me to stop feeling that I shouldn't be here. Oh my God - all the above is just me me me.
Please don't respond as I know you will all say I am selfish and should be thinking of my chidren but believe me I am - What kind of life can I possibly give them?

I am so selfish I am going to ask for this post to be deleted!

So sorry for posting all the above rubbish in the first place!

Nobody's going to flame you for feeling like crap.

Have you got anyone in real life you can talk to about this?

What about your doctor?

You sound depressed but that doesn't mean you don't deserve to be listened to nor does it mean that the way those feelings make you think and feel should be ignored, none of this makes you selfish or a bad person. Depression is as much a real illness as any other and just because no-one else can see your pain doesn't mean it's not very real.

Is there someone i your life you can turn to for support?

Why do you feel this way? I've been there. Many many people have. It does sound like depression.

You need to work out why initially.

Don't delete your post, people will talk you through it.

You are not selfish - you sound like your having a hard time of things - or depressed.
Please talk to some one in real life if you can - not easy I know.
You are not alone, many people feel the same, I used to be one of them, get through one day at a time.

Please see your GP, they can be the first point for help, depression is not weakness its just an illness like any other. But I'm sure you know that deep down.

p.s. Your kids will love the fact you are their parent and love and care for them, you sound like your doing a great job.

Don't feel bad at posting. One times writing things down and letting of steam helps. Why do you think people stare - i'm sure they don't really. Everyone has insecurities about themselves which other people don't really notice. Try to stay positive, and if you need to talk, go to your gp.