To feel very chuffed with myself.(DV related)

[IneedAsockamnesty]

I've talked before on here about my stbexh and the DV and we have been separated for about 3 years that entire time I have had protection orders and various other things in place to keep him away from me but have struggled to get long term orders so had to renew every year.

Well today I went to court by myself no representation and obtained a life time protection order with a power of arrest attached and had the order extended to cover all my children.

Sorry for the not so stealth boast but in RL I have nobody I can really tell as I work in DV services and have done for years so don't really want anybody (for that read anybody stupid enough to do so) to make a professional judgement anti my work because some people are still idiots who think if you have experienced it whilst working in the field then you can't be very good.

Be absolutely made up for yourself! x

He does not have much choice as exactly 100 yards from my house is a police station so the second they see him ( and they do keep am eye out) he will be arrested and at the last breach he was told another breach and he would be looking at prison.

As he's currently on a suspended sentence they would make him serve that time as well.

He's quite well spoken very charming to look at him you wouldn't think anything was wrong and he moves in decent circles the only thing he cares about is what his golf buddies think about him so not having his name in the around the courts page is a huge incentive for him not to breach.

Sock I take my hat off to you (again)

How is the pregnancy going? All well?

Wow, I didn't realise.

I've seen you post so helpfully for other people, and I didnt know it was personal as well as professional.

Well done - I'm so pleased you had such a good outcome today.

Rhonda its going really well everything as it should be.

Brilliant! Well done.

YANBU in the slightest. I'm so chuffed the court took this as seriously as they did. Well done, you've done a brilliant thing.

Sanity,

Its one of those really weird situations this type of work has been something I've been involved with since I was a teenager (started volunteering at a woman's centre back then) and you think all your knowledge will protect you,only it does not.

I was only with him for about 7 years and it started so slowly it was just so hard to put your finger on what was wrong by the time you gather all your knowledge your at a point where you believe the gas lighting and put downs he actually used my work against me and as a tool to use to abuse me so many times. Early on he was just a stroppy git whose sole goal in life was to extract as much money from me as he could and freeload it only became physically violent at the very end. I was very lucky ( in a way)because the courts considered it to be a mega serious thing he did and he did it in front of about 9 witnesses before he beat me up he had me trapped in the house for 4 hours trying to set fire to it and he cut the phone lines so I couldn't call the police but everyone who saw him jumping up and down on top of me in the street when I escaped from the house got involved they all gave statements they all helped so he had no chance of getting away with it. Prior to that night there were the usual things like pushing shoving ect but when your in the situation its so easy when its not an actual hit or kick to put it down to other things and not see it as violence. (I've even seen posters on here put down women who want to react to shoving or poking or pushing and ridicule other posters who say call the police and not posters who normally come across as being unintelligent)

My work did help because I went into auto pilot and knew what orders I could get and I can not fault the police who dealt with me but it does go to show that nobody is safe from a domestic abuser no matter who you are or what you know.

Its such a weight off my mind to know that as long as he lives he can't come near me or communicate with me ever again and I'm more chuffed as IME life long orders are very rare.

Today is the first day of the rest of your life. Enjoy x

Sock, well done and congratulations! Lovely to read a happy ending on this board - you are truly awesome and enjoy your very restful sleep tonight. x

Well done you. I'm sure you have enormous empathy with your clients due to your own experiences.

Well done you! I can't really add anything more to the admiration and joy at your success that's already been stated on this thread, but I'm really so, so very pleased for you.

And it's lovely to know that when you're dealing with people who need your help in a professional capacity they are likely to relate to you better and believe you because you've been there.

Well done.

Hope the rest of your pregnancy goes as well as it has done so far.

Go Girl! Boast away - you've earned it

De-lurking to congratulate you. I don't know your story but I think what you have done is truly amazing,you should be so proud of yourself!

Well done! Fantastic achievement for you and your family. Wishing you and your family all the happiness in the world

It sounds like you have overcome a lot - you should be more than chuffed with yourself as it sounds as though your courage will have made life better for your whole family.

Congratulations

What you have achieved is amazing!!!! It just goes to show that DV can happen to anyone. I can only imagine that your clients will find your story and strength inspirational. I am so pleased for you and your DC

Here to a peacefull future

I think the DV profession is so terribly lucky to have you.

I'd want you in my corner every time. And anyone of your profession that judged you, imvho, shouldn't be in it in the first place!

Well done, a huge well done! What you've done is immense and you have every right to be proud of yourself.