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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

What is wrong with describing someone as Asian?

347 replies

ProudAS · 30/07/2013 11:37

It's what the person is and not being used in a derogatory manner. My colleague felt he had to whisper though when describing another colleague to me.

I fail to see how describing someone by their ethnicity is any different to describing them by their gender.

OP posts:
curlew · 30/07/2013 12:23

Funny how there are always so many people with multi ethnic families and friendship circles on threads like this..........

LyraSilvertongue · 30/07/2013 12:24

Goodtouch, no I wouldn't say it was racist at all. Just a minor error. I'm sure no-one was offended.

tedmundo · 30/07/2013 12:25

Funny in a nice way or a mean way?

curlew · 30/07/2013 12:25

Funny meaning..interesting......

applepieinthesky · 30/07/2013 12:25

Funny how curlew?

tedmundo · 30/07/2013 12:26

stopgap .. Ahh, I see what you mean there.

HarderToKidnap · 30/07/2013 12:26

I think the vast majority of people have multi ethnic groups of family and friends don't they?

GoodTouchBadTouch · 30/07/2013 12:26

stopgap - my mum used to say things like "Indians are ever so intelligent"

and "gay people are very creative"

even "people with downs syndrome always seem to be so happy"

She was just trying to be pc...

My Granma still says nigger in the woodpile.

LyraSilvertongue · 30/07/2013 12:26

Curlew, funny how?

I've never used 'dual heritage' and never will. Far too PC.

HarderToKidnap · 30/07/2013 12:27

I don't think curlew knows many non white people. That's why when she meets one she desperately scrambles round trying not to mention their race but instead their lovely cardigan, and marvelling at us all knowing lots of Asian, black and Chinese people!

BeyondTheLimitsOfAcceptability · 30/07/2013 12:27

Ted - Darn!

Curlew, do you only know white people? Confused
Where do you live?

moogy1a · 30/07/2013 12:27

Funny how there are always so many people with multi ethnic families and friendship circles on threads like this..........
maybe because we live in a very multi ethnic country? I don't understand what you mean

BeyondTheLimitsOfAcceptability · 30/07/2013 12:28

Curlew, if you dont believe me, I have pictures! Hmm

tedmundo · 30/07/2013 12:28

It is interesting that people have lived abroad, met partners abroad and had children?

Is it funny? Just normal for me. I know a lot of people who have lived and worked overseas.

Talkinpeace · 30/07/2013 12:28

Asians have been told to aim for lower BMI that whites ....
Asians includes China, South East Asia, Indian Subcontinent

BeyondTheLimitsOfAcceptability · 30/07/2013 12:30

Tell you what I find funny, how many people assume everyone they talk to online is white. Saw it happen the other day, one poster kept pointing out she was black, yet being lumped in with all those racist white people by the person she was arguing with!

HarderToKidnap · 30/07/2013 12:30

My nan is a bit racist too - "a man helped me on the bus today, he was Asian but he was so lovely!"

frogspoon · 30/07/2013 12:30

moogy, whilst most major cities are ethnically very diverse, some rural areas have very few ethnic minorities.

So if curlew lives in a very rural village she may not have met many people of other ethnicities.

Jefferson · 30/07/2013 12:30

I agree appleinthesky. Interested to see what other non-white mumsnetters think?

applepieinthesky · 30/07/2013 12:31

It's completely normal when you live in a multi cultural country. I would find it more unusual if someone didn't have any Black or Asian family or friends.

stopgap · 30/07/2013 12:33

Goodtouchbadtouch, my mum once laughed and said, "Isn't it funny how they wear those big black hats indoors?" when referring to a group of Hasidic Jews. I wanted the ground to swallow me up (and I wouldn't mind, but I'm married to a Jewish man!).

My family is all white and prone to similar faux pas; having lived in London or NYC for the last fifteen years, more than half of my friends are non-white. Speaking as a white person (who, incidentally, has been called umpteen racist names by strangers over the years, owing to South Italian heritage and dark olive skin) I can't imagine living in an urban area for a long period of time and only coming into contact with and making friends with other white people.

Jefferson · 30/07/2013 12:33

Oops sorry. Read Beyond's post. I don't mean that I think all the people who have posted are white.

curlew · 30/07/2013 12:34

"That's why when she meets one she desperately scrambles round trying not to mention their race but instead their lovely cardigan"Grin

As I said, I try to avoid using personal physical characteristics to describe people of any race if there is an easy way to avoid it. Apart from anything else, it helps to avoid one's children describing someone as "the man with the enormous tummy". And I would probably not use Asian, because, considering the wide range of "types" who would fit the description it probably wouldn't be very helpful.

GoodTouchBadTouch · 30/07/2013 12:36

See stopgap - where I grew up the only non-white people were tourists. The only time I heard I foreign language was when I was on holiday.

Its completely different for my children

applepieinthesky · 30/07/2013 12:36

Why avoid it though curlew? Being Black or Asian is nothing to be ashamed of. It's not a dirty word Confused