to want a break? My husband thinks so...

[OnTheNingNangNong]

I have two DS. My eldest is at school, my youngest is a toddler. The toddler is really demanding, full on, Tantrumming, screaming, hitting, biting, pinching, climbing nightmare.

I am trying to deal the best I can with it all, but I'm a SAHM. I am burnt out. I have only spent two occasions away from DS2 in his life. One was a hair appointment and once when I had day surgery.

I really want a break, I want my husband to take DS2 out so I can have some peace when DS1 is at school. I don't want it all the time, but once in a while would be really helpful.

My husband doesn't see why I want it. If we go out he wants us all to go. His idea of going out is taking DS2 into the garden for 5 minutes until he gets bored and comes yo find me.

I've had enough. I know my husband doesn't get a break as such, but I do take the children out when he wants stuff done so he can get on with it. He doesn't want to socialise outside of the house.

I had promised to take DS1 to the local large play park tomorrow, knowing that my husband will be off work this weekend. The first in a while. DH has now arranged for hisfather to come over and do some DIY. He knew I had plans- he could take DS2 while I ran aboit with DS1, who really needs some time on his own.

I feel really shitty and close to tears over it all. I just want time to myself in the day light.

AIBU?

Yep go for it. Everyone needs time on their own.

When I was on maternity leave last time and DH was WOH, we arranged that he would take DS out every Saturday morning so I could have a break. Having that routine helped us because otherwise we fell into the habit of doing things as a family, which although nice didn't give me a break or give DH one-on-one time with DS.

Will be interesting to see how we manage it once DH goes back to work now we've got DS2, but DH does recognise the need for us to "swap roles" for everyone's sake. YADNBU.

YADNBU and your husband is being just horrible - you need this time for your health, well being and sanity. You need it without children and you certainly need it (more so) when you have two young kids.

You deserve this time, take it.

He needs to walk a mile in your shoes and then see how "selfish" you're being to want a little bit of time to yourself.

and

Good on you for putting some changes in!

I have time on my own. I am a horrible horrible person without it.

DH works hard, and had the DC on saturdays until 3 because I work.

I know that he finds that ridiculously difficult so I do try to take them away from him for a couple of hours over the weekend so he can get some time. It's terrible to be tied down all the time.

YANBU
I sent DD2 to nursery one day a week once DD1 started school, despite being a SAHM.

We drove each other nuts, she wanted company, I wanted peace

YANBU infact i could have written some of that post myself. My DS is very difficult at the moment. I don't get alot of time to myself, but i most definitely leave DS to DH at the weekends, and i deal with DD, so that I get a break and DH gets to remember what its like

Thank you all again. I had a bit of a lie in this morning, only half an hour, but still it's a lay in.

I do wonder if my husband is worried/scared about looking after the DC, but they're his children too and he can cope, as every body has to when they have children. I will be making sure next Saturday I will be having a break, no matter what- as my eldest is having his birthday party on the Friday and I will need space to recover.

My husband works various shifts so I couldn't do set days, but I can plan for every 3 shift cycles on the second day off so everyone knows what's happening.