ILs BYOM bbq - AIBU? (Do I win the prize for most acronyms in an AIBU?)

[ViviPru]

The PiLs are hosting their annual summer family bbq at the weekend. Everyone tends to bring a bottle or two, (which suits me as I'm slimming and am happy to provide my own low calorie wine) and a several of us contribute something which tends to be individual to the invitee, so a godparent always takes a particular salad, someone else lives near a nice bakery so always brings some nice breads etc etc. I usually take a pudding or a cake that travels well as we live some distance away. Plus Mil doesn't buy free range eggs so I would rather bring the pudding so I know its provenance. MiL usually gets in touch the week before to confirm whether we will be bringing said items.

This year however, its 'Bring Your Own Meat' for the BBQ. Apparently they have done a booze cruise so have plenty of alcohol and have said not to bring any at all as their fridges are at capacity. They're always fully stocked with booze cruise spoils anyway, so it's slightly annoying that the intimation is there that where they would ordinarily provide BBQ food, they are now providing the drinks instead. And salads and a pudding.

The same number of close family members are invited as usual (about 25 guests in total) and the ILs are definitely not in any financial difficulty whatsoever, they can however be a bit penny pinching and whinged last year about how much the whole shebang was costing.

I'm not opposed to BYOM per se, we often do it with close local friends for small low-key occasions, but AIBU to think that BYOM is a bit of an unreasonable request in these circs and to feel a bit grumpy about it? It's not a huge inconvenience; we will be travelling for 3 hours so I'll need to bring the cool box, not a major issue, but we'll also have to stock up at the butchers now which I hadn't scheduled between now and the weekend, and I CBA to hover over the BBQ to ensure DP gets his nice farm-assured steak and burgers we've brought before some uncle gets his mits on it. I just think the notion is a bit silly. Added to the annoyance of not being able to bring our own drinks (even if we just keep them in the cool box rather than 'demand' fridge space we will still get raised eyebrows) and pudding.

I'm also hot and bothered and anything would probably get my goat right now. Bah.

I love byo type affairs.

But, i would be peeved to not get to eat my own offerings.

Plus it would be a pita to take meat if travelling and staying elsewhere the night before.

I'm pretty shit at rant... I got it out of my system when the BYOM email came through and I got on my high horse to DH. Then my initial fury subsided somewhat so I decided to stoke my own flames by bringing my non-problem to you people for a good fist-shake... but even this is not working.... I can't seem to muster the rage.

I don't really mind if I don't get my own meat to eat, (maybe our friends/relatives are too self-conscious to bring Tesco value sausages!) and if your DH doesn't either then I'd not worry too much.

I admit I really wouldn't fancy carting meat around for 3 hours though! Hope it keeps fresh for you.

vague rage.

Too hot to be wound up.

To ensure you can EYOM, can I suggest buying some of the little flags you can get and sticking them in the meat

On the flags you can write Vivipru and (farm assured) so that everyone knows it's yours and the provenance

i would be peeved to not get to eat my own offerings.
I have no problem with a BYOM bbq as long as you get to actually EYOM.
I get what you mean about taking nice meat and some other fucker eating it,

So how do we ensure this issue does not arise? I'm going to source some godforsaken haloumi if it kills me, but I don't want to hover around the BBQ like some kind of naice meat and greek cheese obsessive.... I don't want to be people to know that I am that woman....

Xpost Gobbo

FLAGS! Genius.

Another YAB very U from me too.

It sounds like you are looking for things to be grumpy about.
Unless the BBQ starts at 10 in the morning I can't imagine its not possible to buy something locally. You could even arrange a supermarket to deliver direct to your In-Laws on the day of the BBQ.

I am sure you will be allowed to take your own low calorie drink If you are actually going to be 'banned' from fridge space just pop some ice in your drink.

I can completely relate to threads about irritating in-laws but you need to be fair about what you perceive as irritating

Food colouring could be your friend here. You will know the funny green tinge is nothing to worry about...

Twinky food colouring?! You're a pass master at this...

Maryz I like your style... although will I be able to convince PiL that I like my haloumi rare?

Twinkly

TWinkly even. It's clearly too hot to respect your name.

But everyone will steal your Halloumi and corn on the cob,vivi!
trying to fan the flames of vague rage as I'm hot and grumpy and would quite like a (burger) bun fight

I am very disappointed that nobody has called you entitled yet. :( In fact, I was considering working up to a vague rage about that, but it's too hot.

You need to write the name of the farm on the flags.

I couldn't find any halloumi either the other day. Weird

YABU.

Just stop on the way at the supermarket and pick up some meat. And halloumi cheese. I love halloumi...

I'm actually getting a gentle rage at the lack of YABUs from those who have not RTFT accusing me of PiL prejudice Knid

Kiri I think there's a cartel buying it all up the second it hits the shelves....

I think all I can manage is a tepid rage. Maybe.

Vivi - I was all set to say YABU but then I remember when we were at a bbq last year (we always have BYOM or bring and braai - its a South African thing), and there were nearly fisticuffs between DH and another guest when he tried to claim our butcher bought, doorstop thick steak and leave us his supermarket skirt steak. Saffas take their meat very seriously.

Best solution - everyone brings and cooks their own meat!

I want a bbq now but DH not home until late .

My Dad went to a BYOM, he did get to EHOM but it was FUBAR*

*Fucked up beyond all recognition

Why would you hide a halloumi mountain? Give it to me

Lidl vegeburgers?