To think he is being unreasonable???

[BookwormBetty]

My DH works 300 mile away and drives to work every Sunday evening and home thurs evening. He usually leaves at half 5 Sunday but recently has been leaving at about 4pm - says he is getting tired on the road (which I understand).

I was needed with my mum Sunday gone (she has a terminal disease and in a wheelchair) and couldn't get back home until 5pm. DH was with DC (5, 3 & 1), and text me saying he couldnt believe i'd done this. We had already spoken about me not being able to get back in time and it was a touchy subject. when I returned he stormed out of the house and sped off down the road and we haven't heard from him since.

I just think he is being unreasonable and was no real hardship for him to leave a bit later - like he just to do anyway. AIBU?

Bloody Hell, I could not live like that.
Can he not find work nearer home?

He's tried it and it didn't work :-(

Of course HIBU. You are going through a tough time if your mum is terminally ill and he needs to start supporting you rather than being a selfish knob

That's what I think!

how long does it take him to drive? it must be taking quite a toll on him.

however, he should have been more gracious given the circumstances, or arranged child care til you were back.

sorry about your mum. it must be really difficult for you at the moment and this can not have helped.

He is being unreasonable. One hour isn't going to make a huge difference to him. If he's tired he should stop half way and take a break. I used to drive 250 mile round trip once a week and I have an underacrive thyroid which causes tiredness. Breaks and coffee and fresh air. Or don't drive until you feel able to, simple as that.

I'm sorry to hear about your mum.

I think an hour is fine particularly considering your mothers circumstances. It's not like you were with get till 9pm

We have no child care options, my mum was our person. It take about 4 plus hrs for him to get there. I figured he could have stopped for a break.

Thanks for all your kind thoughts about my mum.

If it takes him four hours, even leaving at 5 he'd be there around 9, when it's still light.

Of course he's unreasonable. He might have a long drive but you have the stress and hard work of looking after your children and your mum. Presumably his evenings are spent doing whatever he wants?

So sorry to hear about your mum. That must be so difficult for you and for her.

If you was having a catch up with friends then I could see his point but you was caring for you mother.

I am sorry about your mum, your husband should be supporting you not adding to your worries by driving off like a twat.

I'm so sorry about your mum. Your DH was totally unreasonable.

Is there really nowhere for him to work closer to home? Can you all move to where he works? It just doesn't sound very sustainable in the long term, especially if you don't have emergency childcare.

I don't think anyone is being unreasonable. I see 2 people who are under a lot of stress and pressure. I see one person (DH) who isn't coping with it particularly well. I'm sorry you're both having a tough time, but obviously op is having it tougher and DP needs to dig deep and be a bit more supportive. But he's still not exactly being U, I think he's struggling.