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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to think this is a bit rude of postman?

17 replies

HaveIGotPoosForYou · 15/07/2013 20:11

I have ordered a few things online, mainly clothes. One of the items got delivered today.

I was in the living room, partner was just about to answer the front door when it knocked but was upstairs so had to come from upstairs to downstairs. By this time the postman had gone round the back where we have a gate. The gate was open as in not locked, but it was shut over (Front door wasn't working for my Mum this morning so had to go round the back. Partner was going to try and open the front door as it plays up a lot). Anyway, postman comes through to our back garden where the gate leads. He opens the back door to our house which wasn't locked as we let my partners guide dog out on and off throughout the day.

Postman opens up the door and chucks my clothes parcel in and then just leaves.

AIBU to think it's rude to let yourself in through someone's gate without instructions to, to then go into their garden, open up their back door and throw a parcel inside and not even say a word?

OP posts:

minibmw2010 · 15/07/2013 20:15

Have you ever asked him to do that before? They are on a fairly right turnaround so don't always have time to wait. At least you got your parcels.

OldLadyKnowsNothing · 15/07/2013 20:16

My postie opens my door every day. Quite happy for her to do it.

WaitingForMe · 15/07/2013 20:16

I'd report him. That'd freak me right out.

BrianTheMole · 15/07/2013 20:19

I wouldn't be happy with it.

MooseBeTimeForSpring · 15/07/2013 20:21

Our postie was fab. If he could get them in, he'd put parcels through the cat flap. If not, they went behind the wheelie bin (never in it).

Gruntfuttock · 15/07/2013 20:21

I'd prefer that to having to go to the delivery office.

jchocchip · 15/07/2013 20:23

Gosh yes, our local delivery office has shut and it is 6 miles and a days wait to go to collect!

Original poster

HaveIGotPoosForYou · 15/07/2013 20:33

Not this particular postman, no.

The other postie we asked to leave near gate but never to go into the house.

I was BFing at the time so it freaked me out quite considerably.

It was only about 45 seconds, hardly a long wait to be honest with you. I know some people are impatient, but that's a bit much. Could've waited an extra 45 that it took for him to go through the gate and just let my partner open the door and thank him for the parcel.

OP posts:

quoteunquote · 15/07/2013 20:37

Seems a good idea, at least it wasn't left anywhere someone could get it, or you have to go and get it.

My postmen/women always pops into the kitchen, and put the post on the table, my dogs don't mind. (we have a lot of dogs).

Original poster

HaveIGotPoosForYou · 15/07/2013 21:29

My DPs dog wouldn't mind either in fact, he'd probably lick the man to death.

We're not particularly friendly with the postman though. It's not that we aren't nice, he just isn't very chatty.

If we were on proper talking terms I wouldn't mind so much iyswim. It just feels like an invasion of privacy.

OP posts:

soontobeburns · 15/07/2013 21:39

No not rude. My old postman was very rude!. I was a student and doing voluntary work so was in during the day and out mostly in the evenings.

He frequently liked to say "sleeping again" "well I knew you would be in" "about time you answered the door"

I also at one point got quite a few parcels delivered and he would bitch to me about delivering them and telling me to stop online shopping.

Dick.

taleteller · 15/07/2013 22:23

well I would not find that acceptable. Our postie would never ever dream of opening our gate let alone go to the back door, let alone open it. If he ever did that I would definitely complain. Maybe it depends where you live if some people have posties coming into their kitchen!!

Reading that you have a guide dog in your home makes me wonder if he feels he would like to be more "helpful" and perhaps he did this with the best (misplaced) intentions. I am speculating here as I have no idea of your circumstances. Just a thought.

If you didn't want him doing this I would speak to him and suggest an alternative place for parcels to be left.

SaucyJack · 15/07/2013 22:29

YANBU for you to not personally appreciate him coming into your home uninvited.

However, I should imagine there are just as many people out there who would love the complete lack of faff.

Original poster

HaveIGotPoosForYou · 18/07/2013 13:17

tale I am staying with my parents at the moment so at my parents house. DP is only here during the weekend as he works, so the guide dog is only here some of the time. I think the postman has only seen it once or twice, as far as I am aware.

I think it does depend on the dynamics of the area though, you are right.

Saucy If I'd have asked him or he offered wouldn't have minded too much but wasn't too keen on uninvited doing it, especially whilst breastfeeding right next door.

OP posts:

ThePowerof3 · 18/07/2013 13:25

On one hand I'd be happy to get my parcel but yes it's a bit rude to chuck it through your back door!

Helenagrace · 18/07/2013 16:27

At least you got your parcel! Round here you'd have a "sorry we missed you" card through the door and when you race to the van you find that they never intended to deliver it and it's still in the depot.

That is of course if they haven't already nicked the parcel!

Purple2012 · 18/07/2013 16:32

Our postie is brilliant. We both work shifts so if the curtains are closed he won't knock but give it to a neighbbour he knows we are friends with. If they're not in he will leave it somewhere safe in our back garden with a note through the door.

Flip