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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to expect someone to see the 'do not block access' signs on an adapted minibus?

56 replies

deebeeandboys · 13/07/2013 12:43

First post on here, hello! :-)

We have a minibus, it's adapted with a ramp at the back, drivers seat turns so my husband can get in and out easily with his powerchair. It's a bit knackered, needs a lot of work to the body, but it's clearly a wheelchair accessible vehicle, not a builders van or something.

We park up on a main road, next to a lowered curb, to fetch the kids from school. We have to drive as we've moved house and the kids have had enough stress over the past 3 years without changing schools again too. Dh often gets out and goes with me, if it's nice. Quite a few times, we've had people park over the lowered curb behind us, but they've noticed the 4 various signs on the doors saying 'please leave 3 metres for access' and given enough space.

Yesterday we parked up a little early, to go to the shops. I nipped back to the minibus on my own to drop something off and noticed someone had parked right up over the lowered curb, too close to get the ramp down. There was another car's length at least empty behind them, so they had deliberately decided to park that close- they could have reversed up a bit to give us space.

Got back with the kids and the car is still there. No room to get dh back in (and he's the only driver).

We waited. All the other parents parked up nearby left. Got fed up, called the local police and they said they'd send someone out.

Just before the police arrived, a couple with a baby came strolling back- staring into the van as they walked past, then proceeded to get into this car- they weren't going to speak to us or apologise.

I have two noise levels- very quiet or very shouty. After 45 minutes standing in the heat waiting for them to come back, I was fuming. I told them we'd called the police, that they'd blocked us in. Their attitude was 'we can park where we like' and 'we made a mistake, but you won't resolve this amicably'. They then pulled out into oncoming traffic and nearly hit a car.

Is it acceptable to knowingly block in what is clearly an accessible minibus? And stand watching from a park (realised after they were the people doing that- maybe waiting for us to leave or something or wondering why we were photographing their car... I nearly went over to the park and yelled out the reg number- dh wouldn't let me Grin). And then get shirty about the people you've blocked in being upset and pointing out 'mistakes' have consequences?

Policeman suggested we buy cones to put behind the van! Shouldn't have to get that far- what happened to common sense? We don't have an adapted minibus for fun- I doubt they'd swap. Sad

I'm a little bit stressed about other stuff and this has kind of tipped me over the edge. Angry

OP posts:
BoneyBackJefferson · 13/07/2013 15:15

deebeeandboys

"We park up on a main road, next to a lowered curb"

Do you mean blocking a lowered curb or to the right/left of a lowered curb?

YouTheCat · 13/07/2013 15:21

Even if someone was cross, I would apologise, because it would have been my fault for not reading the many signs.

Yes, RedHelen, cross posted.

I still think a lot of people on this thread don't realise how horrifically annoying, frequent and inconsiderate this is.

WestieMamma · 13/07/2013 15:26

I'd like to think they made a mistake as it's easily done. I have to confess though that if someone was 'fuming' and having a go and telling me they'd called the police, I wouldn't apologise either. I'd be too afraid and want to get away quickly (possibly explaining the near collision). But then I'm a big scaredy cat.

gallifrey · 13/07/2013 15:29

what does that mean?

YouTheCat · 13/07/2013 15:30

It means 'read the thread'.

KirjavaTheCat · 13/07/2013 15:40

I imagine their AIBU would get a few sympathetic comments.

"AIBU to expect that if I was unintentionally blocking someone in, they'd try to find the owners of the car? Considering we were in the park across the road from where we were parked, and they kept looking in our direction as if they wanted to say something. They waited 45 minutes for us to come back, only to shout at us and threaten us with the police. We didn't know why they were standing by their vehicle. It was a genuine mistake. I was so shaken up I nearly crashed into another car with baby DD in the back while trying to get away"

I can see both sides tbh.

quoteunquote · 13/07/2013 16:01

How do you know they saw the sign?

Would't that come under driving without due care and attention, as a driver you are required to take notice of signs and other road users.

Preventing another road user from using their vehicle is completely unreasonable,

And ignorance is not a plea in this countries legal system.

If it was a mistake, why didn't they apologise?

Because they were in convenient denial, ignorant people who don't even realise they are TAB.

next time take a photo and put it on, youparklikeacunt

YouTheCat · 13/07/2013 16:06

Exactly, Quote.

Mia4 · 13/07/2013 16:36

YANBU to be angry at the thoughtlessness and they should have apologised tbh but if they park over a dropped kerb then they aren't all that considerate anyway OP. If you have the pics isn't there some 'twatty driver' website you can submit to? Pretty sure I've seen that mentioned here.

Mia4 · 13/07/2013 16:39

That's if they were over a dropped one, looked like that at first glance but on second I'm not sure. Were they OP?

WestieMamma · 13/07/2013 16:47

And ignorance is not a plea in this countries legal system.

Yes it is, depending on how the law is written. Some laws state that it is an offence to 'knowingly ...'. In which case ignorance is a defence.

YouTheCat · 13/07/2013 16:53

It's still driving without due care and attention though, which is an offence.

WestieMamma · 13/07/2013 16:57

I'm not sure it is though. It could be argued that reading what's on the side/back of a van rather than watching the road and the road signs is driving without due care and attention.

gallifrey · 13/07/2013 16:59

so you can't drive at all then? not even to pull it forward a bit? Maybe you should learn and then this wouldn't happen again.

YouTheCat · 13/07/2013 17:01

That would be against the law and would invalidate insurance if there was an accident.

How about a bit of consideration? Learning to drive is very expensive, why should OP fork out when all people have to do is read one of the 4 signs on the back of the vehicle?

gallifrey · 13/07/2013 17:08

because people are tossers who block other people in, and they had to wait for them to come back before they could move. Or ask someone else to pull it forward for them, I'm only trying to suggest other courses of action so they don't have to go through this again!

quoteunquote · 13/07/2013 17:20

so you can't drive at all then? not even to pull it forward a bit? Maybe you should learn and then this wouldn't happen again

So she should accompany her DH everywhere in case ignorant illiterate TABs prevent him getting into to his vehicle? seriously, you want her to break the law because someone can't be bothered to park properly?

It could be argued that reading what's on the side/back of a van rather than watching the road and the road signs is driving without due care and attention

No it couldn't, unless you are suggesting that drivers are not required to read the signs when they park, which is what everyone has to do, to find out how long they can stay in a space.

The OP's vehicle was clearly there first, as else how would her DH of got out?

To block someone in is disgraceful, to prevent a disabled person from getting into their vehicle is so fucking vile and selfish, it is nasty bullying.

Some disabled people are operating at their limit, when they need to go, they need to go, being in pain, or the stain of limited mobility is incredibly hard, anyone who is still managing to get about deserves consideration, not shitty selfish self serving interference.

when someone you know is no longer a TAB, remember your selective ignorance.

and take the chair challenge, one normal wheel chair, you get your both your legs gaffer taped together, wear two padded jackets, and snow mittens. and do everything you have to do in a normal week without any assistance.

report back your findings.

gallifrey · 13/07/2013 17:30

I'm disabled actually so I know exactly what it's like...

WestieMamma · 13/07/2013 17:33

No need to get so personal. I haven't said blocking anyone in is acceptable, just that I don't believe it constitutes driving without due care and attention.

quoteunquote · 13/07/2013 17:48

which is really unacceptable as you are helping create a culture of accepting below standard driving,

When you drive along the road and you see a highways vehicle with the sign on the back, warning you there are maintenance teams working ahead.

would you consider it constitutes driving without due care and attention to not read that information and adjust your driving accordingly?

WestieMamma · 13/07/2013 17:56

I'm sorry but no amount of frothing will make failing to read a sign in a private parked vehicle you are parked behind driving without due care and attention. It just won't. Don't take my word for it though, read the CPS guidance on prosecuting the offence and you will see it doesn't relate in any way shape or form to parking too close behind another vehicle.

If done knowingly, it's selfish and inconsiderate. No doubt about that. But I'm not aware of any legislation prohibiting it.

quoteunquote · 13/07/2013 18:09

so if you pulled up behind a parked ambulance, you wouldn't read the word ambulance on the back?

LittleSporksBigSpork · 13/07/2013 18:18

I'm so sorry this happened to you OP, YANBU at all.

It shouldn't have to come to cones, though sadly I agree with the police that it would be a good precaution for any in your situation to take. Particularly as I guess the minibus is adapted for him to drive and would be difficult for most other people to be able to just pull forward (previously drove, can't now due to disability, and some adapted cars I've seen may as well be spaceships for how intuitive it is for someone who it isn't adapted for and some are adapted in a way that it's basically impossible for anyone else to drive it).

I hope your day got better!

YouTheCat · 13/07/2013 18:40

They didn't fail to read one sign, they failed to read 4.

Shesparkles · 13/07/2013 18:52

It doesn't constitute driving without due care etc, because unfortunately for the OP and many others in her situation, these signs, no matter how many of them there are have no standing in law, just the same as an individual disabled parking bay outside a house has no standing in law. It's a courtesy thing, and unfortunately not everyone has shows courtesy or consideration towards others.

I think to compare parking behind OP's adapted vehicle to an a,balance is a red herring, an ambulance is an emergency vehicle, OP's is an adapted private vehicle.

I say all this as the daughter of a very disabled man, who drives an adapted vehicle, which I often have to drive for him, so I'm WELL aware of the challenges faced.

I tnk the response from the driver of the other vehicle has been a combination of fighting fire with fire, responding to the OP in the same way she approached them, along with a bit of a guilty conscience and attacke being the best form of defence