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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

to think the internet has saved hundreds of womens lives?

2 replies

Bogeyface · 11/07/2013 18:29

Good natured argument debate with my friend about this and I wondered what MN thought.

I say that many many women who would have been too isolated or too ashamed to get help can now find support when they are in abusive relationships to the point where many will have left where otherwise they would have stayed. My friend says no, women either stay or leave depending on how bad things are and how they feel about their husband.

I have seen women empowered by the support they have found on here, Netmums et al who have contact WA and then found themselves able to leave. I wonder how many of those women would have ended up dead at the hands of their abusers if they hadnt had that support. My friend uses forums so I am surprised she says that they would have left anyway, that said, she is a very strong person and did leave an ex BF when he hit her once when he was drunk. The concept of staying with someone like that is totally alien to her and I wonder if that means she is not very sympathetic to abused women.

I wish that these forums had existed 50 years ago, so that my aunt wouldnt have spent a lifetime with her abusive husband. My uncle is a bastard, mainly EA and FA but occasionally PA as well. He was never faithful and their DD's hate him. But she was brought up to believe that once you were married, that was it, you stick at it and work at it. My grandparents tried to talk her out of marrying him, but once she was married they didnt do anything to encourage her to leave but you just didnt do that. She is still with him now, in her 70's and he is still a bastard. Perhaps if forums like MN existed then where she could be anonymous and not worry about "what will the neighbours say?" she would have left and I also wonder if things like WA, lone parent support groups, benefits for lone parents etc would have existed much sooner too.

Anyway.....ramble over.....

has the internet saved lives?

OP posts:
SoleSource · 11/07/2013 19:48

YANBU

The support and confirmation of their feelings is invaluable and IMO does spur people on to want to improve their lives. Change can be very scary and sites such as Mumsnet can offer a safe place to discuss problems.
By reading posts of other people's positive experiences and encouragements directed at the abused, people do change for the better.

The internet is often deemed as bad but there is so much good too.

SoleSource · 11/07/2013 19:49

It is easier to admit one is being abused online than in reality for lots of people.

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