Or is it just unusual where I live.

[midnightisaplace]

Since the good weather began DS (3.8) has been playing out much more than usual. There are a group of about six children who are all within about a year of each other and they have a great time together.

We have always started DS bed time routine at 7 with a bath after which he goes straight to bed. DS hasn't been too keen on coming in from his friends over the last week or so but I have stuck to my guns and he goes to sleep straight away so I know he needs it.

The other six children were still out playing when I came into the house from a walk ten minutes ago at 9pm. Some of the parents have been looking at me lke I'm mad when I call Ds in at 7. Am I being unreasonable in making my DS stand out as different from his friends?

The vast majority of children do need more sleep than adults.
My 7 year old needs at least 10 hours sleep or she looks terrible and gets very cranky.
Even as a teenager I used to be in bed by 9 or 9.30.

Well I think it's far too young and I would call it irresponsible, unless you have eyes on him constantly. He's no hope of getting himself out of a sticky situation at that age and it can happen so quickly.

Ours never needed much sleep. But tea was at 5.30, bath time at 6.30, story at 7.30 and quiet time from then - often still up. Ds needed sleep from 10 ish as a litly and would goo through to 6 if we were lucky; dd needed to nbe down by 9-9.30 and would wake at 7ish.

No way would they have been playing out - ever at that sort of age. Or even older tbh.

I've had exactly the same situation as you. I am quite strict about 7.30 bedtime on a school night and will ignore any cats bum faces when I break up playtime to bring mine indoors. I don't care what other people do for their children (although I do judge when they're off school the next day, 'poorly'), but I want mine to know that a good night's sleep is integral to feeling healthy and alert, and able to concentrate at school.

7pm is late enough for his age. My DC play out and they and their friends (age 7-11) all go in at six for dinner. DCs play in the garden until 8pm latest and then are in.
School holidays are different but that doesn't apply to you I guess.

Both DCs get called in at 7 and are in bed - usually asleep by 8.
Hooray!

I can't imagine my 3 yr old playing outdoors without me or another adult supervising. Not saying you shouldn't, just interesting that it's obviously normal for you but terrifying to me.

Another one shocked at a three year old playing out. I also live in a cul de sac...I'd never let a toddler out though! My DDs go out to play but they are 8 and 5....the 5 year old is only allowed on our (open) lawn. I keep the front door wide open so I can see her.

Three is TINY!

No way would my Ds been playing out at that age unless I was with him.......is there any adult supervision?

I work in a school and all day every day I watch worn out kids struggling to concentrate on the lesson.

7 pm sounds just right.

I wouldn't let a child that young play out either, if something happened and they weren't being supervised by an adult, social services would, rightly, nail your ass to the wall for neglect. A child that age cannot judge hazards, or be trusted to not follow something that interests them.

Yes and other, older children can't always be trusted with smaller ones. They can be quite mean at times. DH clearly remembers being made to stand on an ant hill as a small child by some older kids who were his "friends" this wasn't England either and the ants where he grew up bite hard.

I can't imagine my 3 almost 4 year old out without me but again I don't live somewhere where it'd be possible anyway

I wouldn't let a three year old play outside unsupervised. Even in a cul de sac you will have some cars driving down the road or backing out of drives, or the possibility of them straying off somewhere or another child lifting them up on to a wall that they then fall off or somesuch.

A lot depends on when they get up though. I'm always hearing parents complain about their school age DC waking up at 5.30am or similar, and these are always the ones with the 7pm bedtimes.

Sometimes ours play [quietly, or they're straight indoors, they know the score] in the garden a little later, and I'm quite sure we probably get a few from the neighbours, but ours don't get up until 8am as that's what works best for us with our morning routine.. up and out and no faffing. Plus DC2 (4) in particular really doesn't seem to need as much sleep as other children her age.

There's the old saying that I may have altered slightly about how you can lead a child to bed, but you can't make it sleep.. I'd far rather them running about in the garden tiring themselves out over them banging and crashing around upstairs making "craft" stuff aka piles of mess or whatever because they're bored and not tired.

Am I the only one amused that Op who had her judgey pants hoiked up about other peoples bedtimes is now on the receiving end of the judgey pants brigade

OP, my dcs have always slept later if they stay up later. Even now age 10 I know some would be a bit as he and all the kids on our street have been out until after 9 all week. He's in bed for ten and up at 8. Its plenty of sleep

Yes to later mornings - DS (5) sleeps 10-11 hours. We are up at 8 and he is usually asleep at about 9.30. He is sometimes playing out till close to 9.