To change from being a timid introvert into a shrieking banshee?

[thismousebites]

I have always been that parent who walks away from confrontation. The one who, if their DC s are upset by another childs treatment, just tries to smooth over it to keep the peace.
But, just lately I have turned into someone else completely. I just feel that I am not going to take any more shit and have started to verbalise my feelings rather loudly.
In the past week alone I have jumped into the car and chased after 3 children who decided it would be fun to wipe dog shit all over DS2. I screeched to a halt when I reached them and basically told them that if they ever went near my DCs again I would fucking have them.
Saturday night our neighbours decide to place extremely large speakers in their garden and delight us all evening with 1000 decibels of Ibiza Classics.
I got so pissed off that at 10.30 I threw open the bedroom window and shouted "Oy, if you don't turn that sodding music down, I am going to call the police" then slammed the window shut. The music became very low.
Then, today I literally burst into the Heads office and gave him the hairdryer treatment over DS1s secondary school allocation.
What is happening to me? I am becoming the woman who used to scare me in the school playground. I half expect myself to start screeching to my own DCs at pick up time tommorrow "Get over her, NOW".
Is this normal? Have I just reached the stage where I am thinking enough is enough, time to start making a stand, or it is just the menopause making me crazy?

Was the Head responsible for the secondary school allocation? I suspect that YABU on that one, at least.

You sound as though you are under a bit of stress at the moment.

YANBU to fuck. People think they can do whatever the hell they like these days. Eg, coming out of the cinema one evening, you know the drill when you are leaving after the film is over, everyone starts milling out and shuffling to the exit. A man behind me thought it would be ok to nudge me along by bumping his rather large belly against my back. Well...............I turned round and reddened him. lol

The first two incidents seem perfectly reasonable and it's hard to say about the third. WRT the first situation - if you can't get worked up about someone treating your child like that then I would suggest there is actually something wrong, so no need to worry that you blasted kids who were doing something so vile. The second might have been better dealt with calmly in the first instance, but they must have known they were disturbing you so it's not exactly the end of the world to give them a piece of your mind.

love the cinema incident.
Yes the Head was responsible.....he admitted this to me this afternoon, so he can scrub me off his parent volunteer list with regards to DD and DS2 who will still be going to his school for the next 5 years
And yes, I do feel very stressed ATM but it is so not me to do this stuff.

YANBU - although it does sound as though early recipients of 'the change' may be receiving some of the years of pent up 'if only...' type interest on your part.

If it makes you feel any better DH, who is usually the peacemaker, did once threaten to kill our neighbours. In fairness, he was in the middle of finals, they had the flat above us and chose to not only to have parties (loud ones) mid-week, but to ignore the hammering on the door asking to keep it down. Anyway, one night, wearing only his dressing gown and several days of stubble, DH tried the door, found it open, marched straight into their sitting room, turned off the stereo and announced to the now quiet room that any further noise would result in him coming back up, removing the door from its hinges and removing the offender over the sixth floor balcony...We didn't hear from them again. .

Enjoy the inner banshee. Frankly, sounds like its good for you and the DC's.

In my case it's an improvement, I've undergone a similar transformation. I was depressed, shy, anxious. Got a bit better. Then my ex royally fucked me around, we split, I have 3 DCs five and under, I work part time. I just don't have time to tolerate other people's shit and shoddy behaviour any more.

In the past year I've confronted a (huge aggressive looking) woman directly at my DCs infants school over her sons bullying behaviour. Not the recommended way to deal with it, but it solved the problem.

I've clawed my way back into work after mat.leave, despite them openly saying they basically don't need me any more but can't fire me unless I fuck up

Basically I am thinking this (admittedly hard) easy of being seems to be preferable to being walked all over. At work they were assuming they could speak to me like I am a lesser mortal; thanks in large part to Mumsnet I have become waaay more assertive and full of self belief. I say seize it and run with it, but maybe tery to adapt it with a positive attitude easier said than done

*(admittedly hard) way of being, that should say

Also I spend a lot of time observing other people, everywhere I go. I now aim to project confidence. It is possibly verging on a slightly aggressive swagger sometimes, but I am vehemently trying to fill myself with worth. I am worth respect. If you expect it you largely get it.

I think thats it. I have read so many threads on MN about people being walked over, ignored, seen as too timid to say anything back, etc, that it has finally got to me.
It does seem to have awoken the tigress in me......along with the raging hormonal changes.

A bit of controlled rage can get things done, plus sometimes it's necessary, like when you/I have used it to defend DCs.
I spent my whole childhood watching my mum being too timid to speak her mind; I remember from a young age feeling frustration at her for never verbalising what I KNEW she would be thinking in loads of situations. Then I realised I was veering that way. Now, I will politely but assertively challenge poor food in a restaurant, or people expecting huge favours that are never repaid, or general thoughtless behaviour. It is easier for me to directly tackle it, or I overthink it and dwell on it a lot longer than I would if it weren't promptly resolved. Have your family/friends picked up on it? People can be very shitty if their perception of you is threatened. . Another reason to be strong

I think there maybe a happy medium between timid and shrieking banshee. The trouble with shrieking banshee is it can put people's backs up and can make situations worse.
I go for persistent and firm.

However, I think shrieking banshee was a very restrained response to the boys and the dog shit incident.

I am glad you are standing up for yourself though. I think 'timid' is the worst option.

Yes I agree that timid is worst.
Funny you should mention that about other peoples perception as a family member did actually ask me if I was not being a bit too "OTT" as they put it. But then they are so used to me not returning fire, so to speak, so they may be feeling a little uncomfortable with my actions ATM.