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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

To point out that the word is 'being' not 'been'

152 replies

Thisvehicleisreversing · 07/07/2013 23:28

I've read a number of posts over the last few days where a poster has used 'been' when they've meant 'being'

It's annoying. So there.

OP posts:
usualsuspect · 11/07/2013 09:52

You don't need to go to Eton to know it's rude to take the piss out of other peoples spelling on a chat forum.

Or label them thick and morons as some charmers have done on this thread.

I'd take manners over spelling any day.

DuckworthLewis · 11/07/2013 10:44

We live in a country with free education for all. English is taught at schools as standard. If you don't get taught well at school then are these things called books which you can take out of free libraries.

I really worry about this country when I hear people spouting rubbish like this, I really do.

Do you mind if I ask how old you are OP?

Pinkponiesrock · 11/07/2013 10:44

What are yous doing today?

Makes me feel a bit sick!

usualsuspect · 11/07/2013 10:49

How can words make you feel sick?

How odd.

DuckworthLewis · 11/07/2013 10:51

All that smugness can get a bit nauseating, I guess

usualsuspect · 11/07/2013 11:13

True dat Grin

ThisReallyIsNotSPNopeNotAtAll · 11/07/2013 11:21

Words make you sick?! Strange.

I came here to chat shit and maybe hand out advice now and again. My spelling and grammar AINT important

Grin

Seriously though. I dont possess the ability to give a flying giraffe about this.

I bid thee farewell

towerofjelly · 11/07/2013 11:31

I am not fantastic at spelling and grammar but feel I get by. My DH is terrible and he knows it and I feel had he gone to school in more recent times he would probably of been given a lot more help. My point is that it is not his intention to annoy the S&G nazzis and often avoids training days and such in fear of the red pen. He won't fill a form in for the sane reason. Get your heads out your arses there are so much more to people than what they do or don't write.

KatoPotato · 11/07/2013 11:33

Sometimes I love been a part time worker!

Seems as how I'm off today...

Nuggets from my timeline...

usualsuspect · 11/07/2013 11:44

My DP is the same,towerofjelly.

he was labelled thick at school,so left at 14,
.
He's always worked though,but dreads training days.

Thisvehicleisreversing · 11/07/2013 12:38

DuckworthLewis I'm 33.

OP posts:
TuftyFinch · 11/07/2013 14:34

I taught a woman, who at the age of 40, couldn't spell the names of het children. She also couldn't read them a bed time story.
She was neither lazy or thick. She attended a school in the Uk from 6-16.
When I taught het, over the space of 1 year, to 'learn' the spellings of her children's names she wrote them both a Christmas card- the first she had ever written. We both cried.
Feeling you're better than someone else based on a natural ability to learn how to spell and write helps no one.
I'm the fastest runner in the world but it doesn't make me better than you.

hellymelly · 11/07/2013 16:39

So just how does finding "would of" annoying equate to bad manners? I am very polite in general.. Smile Anyway slang or colloqualisms in speech, which all of us use, vary with generations, and which are social glue in many ways, are quite different from writing something down in english that makes no sense whatsoever.

DuckworthLewis · 11/07/2013 17:10

hellymelly I am aware that I am generalising here, but it has been my experience that as you go up the socio-economic scale, grammatical/syntactical/muddled homophone errors such as you point out tend to decrease in frequency.

It has also been my experience that individuals have very little control over their own socio-economic status; contrary to popular belief, we are not all born equal and social mobility is much less liquid than The Daily Mail society makes it out to be

I guess I see your looking down your nose at someone's mistakes in the same light as I would if you were sneering at someone wearing 'chavvy' clothes, living in a council house, on benefits etc.

I think its snobby, unpleasant, and yes, ill mannered.

LRDLearningKnigaBook · 11/07/2013 17:22

It's bad manners to comment, not to find it annoying, I think, helly.

I think duck has a point, but I also think it's simply unnecessary to make people feel bad. I know there are a few rare people who'll respond with 'oh, thank you, I'm so glad you corrected me', but honestly, far more will feel hurt or upset.

It is also hypocritical unless you never make a mistake yourself, and I have to admit, every time these threads come along, I am stunned by the number of people who're quite willing to criticize other people, but who get incredibly defensive when it's pointed out that they, too, make mistakes. I think it is fairly telling, that! It suggests people do know it's upsetting (because they get upset themselves) - they just assume they'll not be on the receiving end.

tufty, that's so sad, but wonderful you were able to do that with her. You must feel very proud.

Alisvolatpropiis · 11/07/2013 17:58

Doesn't it depend on the context in which somebody is told they have made an error?

On here? It's designed to make the person who made the mistake feel embarrassed.

In the work place? Well if you're writing letters that will be seen by clients/customers then personal feelings don't come in to it. Mistakes must be corrected.

usualsuspect · 11/07/2013 18:10

Absolutely right to correct in the work place.

But OP started the thread about MN.

DuckworthLewis · 11/07/2013 18:22

Hmmm...it's an interesting point Alis but the fact remains, today's mistake is tomorrow's standard English.

How many of you use the term 'begs the question' to mean 'begs you (to ask) the question'?

This is a perfectly acceptable modern use of the phrase, but it is still technically wrong. I even heard a Judge using it in this context a few days ago.

How many people over the years got 'annoyed' by people using it incorrectly? Tried to correct those using it in the workplace incorrectly? They certainly lost that battle, didn't they?

How about the word 'Gay'? Means something very different to me than it would have done to my great grandparents...

(I could go on, but I'm sure you get the picture)

BackforGood · 11/07/2013 18:26

Thanks to people like the last 3 posters who have defended the right of everyone to come on here and have a chat, against some sneery, rude and downright nasty people who might hopefully think a little bit more before being so offensive in future.

LRDLearningKnigaBook · 11/07/2013 18:32

Absolutely agree, avis, it does depend (though I still think it is important to do it tactfully and I agree with duck that sometimes, we have to be aware that language changes).

Fifty years ago no-one with a non-RP accent could have gone on the BBC. Now, thank goodness, that's changed and people wouldn't expect to be 'corrected' for speaking with a regional accent. I suspect a lot of grammar will go the same way.

AmazingBouncingFerret · 11/07/2013 18:46

It's just dialect and accents though isn't it?

I say could of/should of and been instead of being. It sometimes gets typed that way if I forget to proof read and spell check my inane chatty forum posts...

Those that are sick and crying because of certain words incorrectly said and spelt would keel over and die if they heard the way locals speak round my way!

"Goin tahn to tret me sen lark"

hellymelly · 11/07/2013 18:48

Duck I disagree with that, my grandparents were sticklers for grammar, (my granny was a teacher in an age when education in Wales was reveared above all else). My Grandfather was slaving down the coal mine at 14 , but running his own business in his 20's. Neither were born with silver spoons by any means, but they recognised education as the way for anyone to pursue their aims in life. I think the loss of respect for language is very sad, to be able to express oneself is such a basic human desire. I am not intentionally looking down on anyone, I wouldn't find mistakes annoying in someone who hadn't had educational opportunities, who had special needs, or dyslexia, but I see the "would of" written all the time on mumsnet by women who are clearly educated and whose spelling is otherwise fine. Maybe it is simply modern teaching? I don't know.

hellymelly · 11/07/2013 18:49

Spelling mistake on "revered" serves me right...!

DuckworthLewis · 11/07/2013 18:54

Yes, but I bet your grandparents have no understanding of, for example correct syntax in programming languages? (which is now being taught to 7 year olds under Michael Gove's planned changes to the National curriculum)

Which do you think is more relevant to today's society? Correct use of who's/whose? Or the ability to express yourself in the digital age?

LRDLearningKnigaBook · 11/07/2013 18:59

helly, I assure you, I have immense respect for language (as well as Welsh coal-mining ancestors of my own).

What I found terribly sad, in that context, was the number of people who lost their mother tongue because they were punished for speaking Welsh. That is what was seen as 'education' and 'respect for language' back then.

It's not very different from the attitude towards dialects and accents on this thread, though.

I genuinely find your posts slightly difficult to read, because you don't punctuate properly (what is it with punctuation and people who're pedants on this thread?!). Are you aware you're doing that? And that you might come across as just as 'annoying' as someone who writes 'been' for 'being'?