AIBU to withdraw support and friendship to this woman

[acheekyvimto]

A small bit of background, I met this person through our 8yo DD's. She often struggles with parenting and so I offer support and friendship where I can. Although it hasn't always been easy, she doesn't take any responsibility for her dd's actions, how I kept it together when her DD pushed my 2yo DS down the stairs I don't know.

I forgave her in time because her DD and my DD are friends and I thought they'd both changed.

Fast forward to tonight and I've been dropping all of us off at an activity all week. Her DD has bullied my daughter through most of it, she blamed my daughter with retrospective apologies because my DD was telling the truth.

The final straw is tonight, I get her DD in the back of the car stating that adults don't like my daughter. Mum drags her daughter from car, swearing and cursing.

I've had a text saying "soz, my daughter was talking while driving, told her to be quiet." No mention of her the hurtful things she was saying.

Should I withdraw my offer of friendship.

Well I'm glad you are going to move her out of your dc's social lives... Maybe you can just back off / always be busy? Would that be less of a confrontation so minimising the awkwardness of school? Or do you feel it's important to create a distinct break?

OK, another day, another incident.

I've backed off, her mother seems to be spouting off some rubbish over me and DD to her DD(L). So far this week L has kicked me daughter, said some hurtful remarks about Saturdays incident.

My DD is a drama queen because she cried when L had her nails in embedded in her arms. Or because she deliberates excludes my daughter, she gets upset. I admit that she can be dramatic but it is not up to the mother to refer to her that way. But in that case an apology would suffice rather than blaming my daughter. I don't call her daughter a violent, vindictive little shit to my daughter. Although I would be perfectly within my rights the number of times she has assaulted 2 of my DC.

So another visit into school, lovely teacher seems confident that there will be no trouble next year socially for my DD and she only gravitates to L when there is no one else to play with. They admitted they may have made a mistake with DDs class allocation this year, with her being placed in a class with very strong established friendships among the girls and her friends being in another class.

She is also reeling from the loss of her best friend, who moved away, earlier this year.

Feel reassured, school breaks up on Friday anyway so little chance for further conflict and ignoring of any offers of meeting up and certainly no more offers of help and assistance.